


Soulmates

by moor



Category: Naruto
Genre: F/M, Growing Up, Humour, Loss of Virginity, Pranks, Romance, mention of rape, mention of violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-04
Updated: 2016-12-17
Packaged: 2018-05-24 17:27:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 14
Words: 49,508
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6161044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moor/pseuds/moor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>KakaSaku. Age-swap AU.  A series of interconnected one-shots. Originally posted to tumblr for their October 2015 KakaSaku Month prompt, "Soulmates". Huge kudos and thanks to everyone on tumblr who encouraged me to keep it going into a full story, and especially to AijoInu and sleetfallrain for their immeasurable help and beta skills. All errors remain my own. Loosely inspired by YoukaiYume's age-swap AU, and several others. On with the story!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Age 5/6: Genin

**(In the beginning - age 6 - Genin)**

Frowning beneath his face mask, Kakashi stared up at his sensei.

"Sakura-sensei?"

"Hmm?" She smiled down at the lad from behind the scarf that forever covered the lower half of her face.

Something twigged at his memory, elusive as mist, leaving only faint traces of feeling and emotion behind before they, too, dissipated.

"Kakashi-kun? What is it? I recognize your thinking face," she said, poking him gently in the cheek. Her roseate hair slid forward over her shoulder and Kakashi's strong, little fingers itched to touch it.

_Do you ever feel like things are backwards, and I'm the one supposed to be looking after you?_

Not that he'd ever say that to his sensei; he would never suffer her _that's-so-cute!-_ expression… not for that.

"Nothing."

She watched him from the corner of her eye as they continued walking through the village.

Her idiot former teammate, Naruto, waved madly at them as they passed him and his genin team at the training grounds. Kakashi was sorely tempted to leave a trap or two near its entrance, but sighed to himself when he saw the blond's best-friend eyeing him. Hmph. Damn Uchiha was too attentive. He postponed the plan until the walk back.

"Is your team AWOL?" laughed Sakura as they passed Sasuke, her other former teammate. The Uchiha was leaning against the entrance to Naruto's team's training ground, with apparently nothing better to do.

He huffed through his nose. "Collecting their packs to meet at the gate. Mission."

Beneath his own mask, Kakashi's cheeks burned with jealousy. He had no team, which limited him greatly. No one wanted to put up with a 'kid', especially if that kid was better than they were. His last three teams had rejected him; Sakura was his third sensei, and so far, the longest-lasting one. No other teammates had been assigned to him.

He hoped to keep it that way.

Which meant getting through the too-knowing Uchiha blocking their path.

Sakura frowned at Sasuke, raising Kakashi's hopes.

"You're leaving now?"

The Uchiha's expression softened. "I'll try and be back in time."

"You better."

They held each other's gazes for a beat. Then another.

Kakashi's brow furrowed in consternation. _Ugh._

Perhaps he should move things along himself.

He tugged on Sakura's sleeve. "Sensei, katana practice? You promised."

She nodded, smiling apologetically to Sasuke. "Catch me when you come back."

He nodded, then looked down at Kakashi; a glint in his dark, knowing eyes. "Things going smoother since you got a private sensei, hn?"

As if he was lowering himself to the Uchiha's level. Kakashi gave him an unfriendly, half-lidded stare.

He heard Sakura coughing behind her hand. "Good luck on your mission, Sasuke. Leave my student alone; he'd give you a run for your money."

"Hn."

Sakura shook her head at him, giving him a quick one-armed hug which, to the Uchiha's credit (or discredit), he leaned into and returned right back.

At least until his expression flinched. "Tight," he grunted.

Sakura laughed and released him before sauntering away, Kakashi at her side. "Wuss."

"How many ribs did you crack?" Kakashi asked as they passed another training field. He looked up at her to see her scratch her cheek, just above her scarf. The breeze blew wisps of her petal-coloured hair around her lovely face.

She smirked at him. "Just one or two. This time." She bit her lip before throwing back her shoulders and looking at him proudly. "No one teases my student."

Then she reached down and ruffled his untamed mane of silver hair.

He turned his patented baleful stare on her. "Sensei…"

She laughed at him, and nodded her chin ahead of them, a glint in her emerald eyes. "Training ground seven. On your mark… get set… go!"

He was off like a shot, leaving a trail of camouflaged caltrops behind him.

"Ow! Hahahah! Nicely done, but I'll get you for that!" She laughed, giving chase.

Behind his mask, Kakashi let himself grin.

Just the two of them.

The way it was supposed to be.

* * *

Sakura glanced over at Kakashi and her eyes creased as she smiled at him from behind her raised collar. His eyes dropped to where her mouth would be, then back up to her eyes again.

"Sensei?"

"Hm?"

"How come you always keep your mouth covered?"

"Ah, I have terrible teeth!" she said with a laugh. With an exaggerated gesture she covered her mouth and widened her eyes comically.

She reached over to ruffle his hair and he pursed his lips behind his own mask.

Their travel to Suna as messengers was quiet and relaxed as they crossed through the deep forest. As the mission was a 'B' rank due to the travel, normally a Genin team was unable to accept it. Luckily for them, Sakura-sensei was ANBU-ranked, and though he was only a Genin, Kakashi knew she'd wiggled it out of her Shishou, the Hokage, to give him some time to conduct proper missions.

"You're strange," he said, voice flat.

"Sure am," she said, still smiling.

Strange enough to find the type of mission he could not only do, but do well, and mostly autonomously. She'd let him take the lead through most of the mission.

He looked around. This section of the wood had towering trees with large whorls to land upon…

He looked up, then looked over to Sakura-sensei.

She grinned at him, and winked. "Go for it."

Anticipation rushed through him as he leapt into the trees… and against his training he let out a quick, "Whoop!" as he raced along branch after branch.

He felt Sakura chasing after him, calling encouragement and remonstrations, as she felt necessary.

He felt alive.

* * *

_There!_

It was late afternoon on their mission and Kakashi flipped off the massive tree trunk and it exploded a split-second later. He spun in the air and had planned his next six moves before his small body was bulldozed to the side, careening across the forest to crash, bumping and rolling, far down on the forest floor below. His vision swam.

He made out a blurry shadow to his left. "This? This is what Konoha thinks of us? They send their freaking kids out to escort classified intel?"

The nearest voice echoed behind Kakashi's fuzzy eyes as he strained to get his bearings. _Where had he landed? Where was—_

There came a gurgling noise again from his left, then a soft, heavy thunk as a pair of bodies hit the ground together.

Another two fell a second later, and finally the last. There had been six, he remembered then, and he'd taken out one while Sakura dragged their attention away from him. She had drawn them almost all away, yet they had still gone after him when they realized who she was.

Pushing himself up, he stumbled to his sensei, grabbing hold of her red tunic. "Sensei, are you okay?"

"Kakashi? Oh, thank kami." She dropped to her knees beside him, her hands already glowing. "Let me take a look at you. Your eyes are unfocused, did you hit your head? Come here, baby."

He scowled at her. "I'm a shinobi, I'm not a—" His eyes shot open as he felt the shadow falling across them before he saw it.

Then he was being thrown to the ground again and rolled to the side, covered by a firm, muscled body that was three times his size.

Sakura's arms wrapping tightly around him, she shuddered twice, three times, four… his breathing was rapid and ragged when he suddenly felt Sakura-sensei tear herself off him and fly back at their missed opponent, her scream of rage and sheer power sending shivers up and down his spine.

Her glowing fist tore right through the enemy, and she ripped her fist back before kicking him out of her way, then opening up a crater in the earth to fall into.

Before his young eyes she palmed the earth and shot chakra out, ensuring there were no enemies left.

It was then he saw her back, peppered with kunai and senbon; her tunic becoming more and more crimson.

She glanced back at Kakashi, then, her fierce gaze softening. "Come here, baby, let's get you healed."

Kakashi nodded. His arms were still trembling as he sat obediently in front of her. He didn't miss the hand-signs she cast before she began healing him.

"What was that for?"

"Hm? Just calling some friends." She smiled at him, falling to her knees. "Now, turn your back to me so I can take a look at it."

She healed him before they set back to walking again, though Sakura adjusted their route. "We're going to check in with someone first before we get back on our way."

His eyes flicked up at her back and she turned to face him. "Hm?"

He swallowed.

"It's okay, we're fine. We'll be there soon. Promise!" She smiled down at him, sweat beading on her brow beneath her hitai-ate.

Two hours later, she called a short break, and re-formed the hand signs from before.

Kakashi watched her, and memorized them.

They set out again, though their progress was much slower. Sakura-sensei was leaning on the trees occasionally.

Darkness fell, still they walked, though it could barely be considered progress.

"Should we camp here, Sensei?" he asked, sticking close to Sakura's side

Sakura swallowed, her voice hoarse, her breathing hollow. "Not yet, we're almost there."

Kakashi eyed her dubiously.

She closed her eyes and rested her head against her arm, which pressed against the tree. "Almost there.

"Keep going," she said, forcing her voice to sound positive.

Kakashi nodded, and mentally practiced the hand-signs she'd been doing.

When she fell to her knees, the moon was high in the sky above the canopy. When he reached out to catch her, Sakura gently pushed him away; her touch burned him like fire and she was soaked with sweat.

"Sakura-Sensei, I think you've been poisoned." Kakashi's mouth was dry.

She chuckled, her head falling forward when she tried to nod. She put out her arm to brace herself when she fell forward. Settling on her knees, Sakura brought her shaking hands together and tried to form the seals one last time. Her coordination failed and she sighed.

"Kakashi?"

"Hai, Sensei."

She let out a hoarse exhale. "I need you to do something for me. I need you to keep heading north, and don't stop until you meet the ANBU. The Konoha ANBU. You know what they look like, right?"

Kakashi nodded. "Hai."

"Good. You… you do that. I'm going to take a quick break before I follow."

Shaking his head, his fingers trembling, Kakashi reached out to touch Sakura. "But… We're supposed to stick together."

"Hah, yeah," she panted, before slumping forward. "Sometimes you need to keep going, though. You start moving, okay? I'll be right behind you."

"Hai, Sensei," he said, confident.

She nodded, her eyes remaining closed, before she fell to the ground in front of him. She turned away from him, so her movements were shadowed, and pulled down her scarf; she took a deep breath and touched a glowing hand to her throat. It was too dark for him to get a look at her face before she collapsed entirely, her face covered once more.

His heart thumped hard, before his adrenaline kicked in.

And then Kakashi took off his pack, and dragged a branch closer to sit upon to get a better vantage point, and he took up guarding his incapacitated sensei.

And he began practising the hand-signs she'd been forming, over and over again.

It was all he could do.

Ten kilometres away, the ANBU sentries looked at each other inside their station.

'And Konoha confirms they sent no new ANBU teams this way? That is definitely an ANBU call-sign."

"None, sir. The call-tag is several months old and was replaced weeks ago. It was approaching our location for hours, but has remained stationary for the last forty minutes."

"Had Konoha sent any teams this way?"

Another subordinate shook her head. "No sir; outside of one message delivery mission, there were no teams scheduled for passage through our territory."

"Who was on the message delivery?" The ANBU commander asked, curious. "That shouldn't have required an ANBU, or it would have gone through Central."

But then he felt the burning and forced himself not to react, even as his subordinate replied, "Haruno, Sakura, sir. And she has a Genin with her." The subordinate's eyes widened. "It's Sakumo's son, sir."

"Medical escort, immediately, to the last known location of that beacon-call," ordered the ANBU commander. He strapped on his tanto and leapt to the window. "Be prepared for medical evac."

"The beacon is still coming in strong, sir."

"But it's not moving," said the other, more quietly. "And if it's Sakura, and she's with a child, why couldn't she pick him up and just keep going?"

* * *

Fingers sore, raw and bleeding, Kakashi scrambled for his kunai as he stood over his Sensei. Someone was out there. He had covered Sakura-Sensei up as best he could with her blanket, and his, but he hadn't dared light a fire. It would draw enemy nin to them in a heartbeat.

"Peace, Hatake," came the smooth, low voice from in front of him.

Peering through the night and shadows, Kakashi tightened his grip. "Who's there?"

"ANBU-san," said the commander, stepping closer. He lit a fireball and hung it in the air. "Are you alright?"

"Yes. But Sakura-Sensei's not moving. And she's not really breathing well. A-and she's bleeding." He swallowed, and tightened his jaw. He was a shinobi. He had to be strong. He had to protect Sakura-Sensei. "Poison."

The ANBU nodded. "Let's get you both back to the base and take a look. Follow me." He moved to pick up Sakura-Sensei, when Kakashi leapt in front of him, kunai raised.

"Don't touch her. Who are you?"

The ANBU looked at him, his eyes pinwheeling. "Now is not the time."

Kakashi glared at him right back and swiped the kunai up, fast, faster than the ANBU had even been expecting. It slit the straps that held it to the ANBU's face, and the ANBU let it fall.

There, before him, stood the terror of the Konoha ANBU ranks. The coldest, most ruthless killer Konoha had ever known.

"Collect your things and follow me," said Uchiha Itachi. He picked up his mask and slid it into his vest. Then he gathered Sakura in his arms.

"How did you know where to find us? I've been calling for hours."

Itachi sped up, until Kakashi was racing alongside him, then further and further behind him as Itachi poured on more speed. "We have ways of locating our own," he said.

Kakashi pumped his small legs harder, faster, stronger, but still the Uchiha outstripped him. "Where are you taking her?"

"Taichou! There you are! We were searching for—is that—"

Kakashi heard another voice and saw another masked ANBU join them from the side, another two behind them.

"Take care of the child; I'll take her back to base. Hurry."

With that, Uchiha Itachi disappeared from sight.

The three remaining ANBU turned their masked faces towards Kakashi.

He swallowed and held up a hand. "Yo."

They looked at each other, before one shrugged and looked back at him. "You're coming with us, kid."

"I'm not a kid. I'm a shinobi."

"Come on, let's go check on your Sensei."

* * *

**(Several months later)**

Nothing about the dark-haired man shifted or indicated he'd even sensed Kakashi nearby; but he knew better. Sasuke entered the traditionally structured building and disappeared from sight.

Frowning under his mask, Kakashi scanned the onsen's doorway; there way no way he could follow Sasuke in there, it would be too obvious.

That Uchiha always knew when he was around.

Pulling back from the pointed rooftop ledge he'd been observing from, he took a breath and re-evaluated his strategy.

**(An hour later)**

"You jerk!"

From his spot up on the rooftop, Kakashi peeked over the ledge.

The angry shouting reached his ears easily, but no one had come outside. Yet.

"What do you want, dead-last?"

"You! You dared make a date with Sakura! Without me!"

"Hn. Jealous?"

"You admit it!"

A heavy, exasperated Uchiha-sigh.

"You're being an ass. It's not like that."

"The Hell it isn't! You promised, bros before hos— _you're breaking the covenant of the bro code!_ "

Sasuke gave another sigh when Kakashi heard rustling.

"What are you doing now?" asked the Uchiha.

"You can't break the bro code. I won't let you."

There was an ugly pause.

Then, Sasuke's voice turned dark, suspicious. "What did you do?" More rustling, shuffling noises. "Where are my clothes, Naruto?"

"I did this for your own good. You two-timing, backstabbing bastard."

"Where are my clothes?"

"There are consequences to every—"

"What did you do with them!?"

" _ **Y** **ou forced my hand!"**_

There was a yellow-blond flash that dashed out of the onsen's curtained doors, and a malevolent black storm that screeched to a halt just shy of them. The curtains cast shadows over ten pale, very naked male toes that curled against the hardwood.

With a small, happy sigh, Kakashi smiled behind his mask before sneaking back up the roof again.

Perhaps Sakura-sensei would be able to join him for ice cream that night, after all.

* * *

**TBC**


	2. Chunin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chunin; Kakashi makes friends

**(Two years later - age 8 - Chunin)**

"Does it have to be him?"

Sakura gave Kakashi an affectionate hair-ruffle. Once more, that tug inside him, the one that told him this was right and wrong at the same time, pulled at his heart and stomach.

"If you want to get better, yes. I thought you enjoyed practicing with your katana and tanto? You show so much promise with them."

He refused to pout blatantly, but gave her a look and a sigh.

"Itachi is the best in the village, Kakashi-kun," she said patiently. "I asked him a huge favour to come out to teach you. Normally he only trains ANBU," she said, leading him to the silent, indomitable figure that waited for them on the training ground.

Kakashi's shoulders slumped. It wasn't that he was ungrateful.

Sakura bit her lip and leaned down closer to Kakashi's ear. "If you want to beat Sasuke, Itachi's the only one who can get you there," she whispered. She drew back and winked at him.

Then she straightened and walked up to Itachi, holding her calloused hand out to him. Just behind her, Kakashi's face burned. The Uchiha nodded at Sakura and shook her hand once, firmly.

Sakura reached behind her and drew Kakashi closer to her side, before settling him in front of her. Her warm hand rested on his shoulder, and she gave it a quick squeeze. "Thanks for coming; he's good, he just needs a bit of sharpening around his edges." Kakashi knew she was smiling, he could hear it in her voice; along with her pride in his skills and achievements. "Like any good shinobi."

Itachi nodded, peering at Kakashi with those Uchiha eyes of his.

"Do you wish to learn?" he asked Kakashi directly.

Kakashi nodded, once.

"Be ready," was all Itachi said, before, faster than Kakashi could see, he'd launched himself at him.

To Kakashi's surprise, Sakura-sensei did not interfere or jump in; in fact, she had leapt backwards out of the way. She let him feel the full impact of Itachi's strike, which forced him back several meters; but he'd had his katana up.

Wide-eyed, he stared at the Uchiha… and thought he caught the slightest of smiles pull at the powerful man's lips, the glint of interest pique in his eyes, before it disappeared into his usual impassive expression.

Kakashi looked briefly to Sakura-sensei, only to find her flushed and smiling brilliantly at him.

"Atta-boy! Stand your ground, Kakashi-kun!" she cheered. "Don't go easy on him, he's a tough one, Taichou!"

"You are fast," said Itachi as he looked down at Kakashi, pressing his blade down harder, and Kakashi couldn't help but stare at him, dumbly. He'd just withstood a direct strike from Uchiha Itachi. And he hadn't wet himself. "Adjust your stance, widen your feet, and shift your body slightly to the left…"

The lesson continued. It was one of the more gruelling ones in Kakashi's recent memory, and he threw himself into it, not wanting to waste a moment of the ANBU captain's precious time.

By the end of the afternoon, his knees and arms shook, his hands were numb, he was drenched in sweat, and his kendo teacher stood completely unruffled without a drop of mist daring to affect his temple. His flowing ponytail was still as loose and untangled as it had been at their introduction.

Itachi nodded at Kakashi as he resheathed his katana. "Keep practising. I will evaluate your progress at our next meeting."

Nodding as he struggled to stand up straight and bow properly in gratitude—Uchiha Itachi would be the only Uchiha he ever respected, he decided—Kakashi fought to control his harsh panting. He would not appear weak in front of his sensei. Ever.

Then he felt a strong, proud hand settle on his shoulder and give him a squeeze; his heart rate soared into orbit all over again. "Well, I think this calls for some celebratory dango!"

Sakura smiled down at him and then up at Itachi. "Join us?"

To his horror, Kakashi saw the Uchiha's eyes soften as they set upon his sensei. "Ah. That sounds acceptable."

Kakashi immediately scratched Itachi's name from his 'Respectable Uchiha' list. Back to zero.

* * *

It was another blisteringly hot day when Kakashi was met by two students from the Academy.

One, tall and lanky with shaggy chestnut hair, nodded at him as they stopped in front of him. He chewed his toothpick lazily, considering Kakashi.

The other…

… was still going on and on about youth and introductions and virtue and vigour and… possibly more euphemisms for virility that he was going to ignore, thank you very much. There were some blinding flashes of over-bleached teeth and muscle-straining thumbs' ups and…

Kakashi refocused back on the boy with the toothpick.

"So you're the genius, huh?"

Kakashi gave him an unimpressed stare; the boy smirked and stuck out his hand.

"Right on. I'm Genma."

"Kakashi," he drawled. They shook hands.

"I hear your sensei's pretty hot."

Kakashi shrugged. "If you're into that."

He was never introducing Genma to Sakura-sensei.

* * *

TBC

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Enjoy a little more! Many thanks to sleetfallrain and AijoInu for their wonderful beta help! All errors remain my own (please tell me if/where you find them so I can go back and correct them)!


	3. Age 11/12: Jounin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loss and disparity

**CHAPTER 3**

**(Several years later - age 11, almost 12 - Jounin)**

First there was screaming; then Kakashi heard a sudden slam and a crash.

Outside the Hokage's office, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest, the slender Jounin's eyes shifted to glance at the sealed oak doors. They remained closed, but just barely. Stress cracks had fissured at the joists and hinges, crumbling some of the looser plaster and paint.

Whatever privacy jutsu had been cast, it wasn't holding up against the tirade his former sensei was throwing at the Hokage.

What on Earth could have upset her this much, he'd never be able to guess; so...

He let out a sigh and, with a subtle glance around, pulled a book from his pocket.

Some time later Pakkun, his newest pup, gave a small yip and tugged at the strap of his sandals, seconds before the oak doors were flung open. Lightning-quick, Kakashi had scooped up Pakkun and leapt free from their crushing reach.

"It has to be his decision; he's already fought a war, Sakura! Give him the respect he deserves to have a say in his mission, his future."

"He's a kid!" Roared Sakura.

Kakashi's head snapped up at the fury in Sakura-sensei's voice.

Never. Never had he ever heard her sound like that before. Sure, she'd trash-talked enemies, and she had been angry.

But this was… untamed. Wild.

Then it came to him.

Personal. She connected with this, whatever it was, personally.

He slid his book into his pocket when Tsunade, the Godaime Hokage, stepped forward and held his gaze.

He straightened his back and pulled away from the wall, bowing with set shoulders and stiff arms.

"Hatake, get in here."

"No!" Sakura burst out, fists at her side. Her breathing was coming faster, almost panting.

Brow furrowed, Kakashi's footsteps slowed as he watched his former sensei with conflicted eyes.

"Sakura, do I need to evict you? This is not up for discussion. You were advised as a courtesy; do I make myself clear?"

"This is unnecessary," she grit out between her teeth. "He is better utilized in other—"

The Hokage held up a hand and Sakura-sensei swallowed, her shoulders shaking.

"Dismissed," said the Hokage, voice curt and frosty.

Kakashi swallowed as he saw Sakura-sensei's brilliant viridian eyes swimming with tears. "Please, Shishou, don't ask this of him."

More and more uncertain, Kakashi stepped into the Hokage's office; the Hokage herself leaning over her desk, her hands planted on it as she stared into his eyes. She took a breath and sat down, facing him, while he took his place before her desk. From somewhere unseen, an ANBU shut the door behind him; separating him from his sensei.

He stood alone before the Hokage; the strongest ninja in Konoha; the best medical ninja in all the nations; the surrogate mother to his sensei.

"Your mission," pronounced the Hokage, handing over a scroll to the young Jounin. She nodded at him. He accepted and unfurled it.

And understood immediately why his sensei had fought so hard for him.

"Do you understand your mission?"

"Hai, Hokage-sama." His voice was even; he was proud of that.

"Do you feel you have the skills to successfully complete this mission?"

His mind on the book in his back pocket, he nodded. "Hai, Hokage-sama."

The Hokage leaned back in her chair, her harsh expression softening around her eyes, even as her jaw clenched. He noticed her fingers pressing hard into the wood grain of her desk and anticipated her next question before she asked.

"Do you accept this mission?"

He swallowed.

* * *

He found Sakura-sensei at the training grounds.

The—decimated—training grounds.

He was quite sure his Hokage would have something to say about her apprentice torquing up at least seven different training grounds in a day, but he'd leave that to her.

He wasn't surprised to find her with her closest friend, Yamanaka Ino, holding her to her side as they sat on the half-crushed trunk of an ancient tree. Their backs were to him.

"For these missions, she always asks, Forehead. You have to give them each a chance to say their piece."

"But he's not even twelve, Ino!"

"I know. _I know_ ," said Ino, meaningfully, though Kakashi didn't understand the meaning at the time. "But she will ask. It will be up to him. Trust in him. Believe in him. Support him." She patted her hand down Sakura's messy hair, her ponytail long gone, though the kink in her hair from her elastic remained. Ino had probably pulled it out. The pair did that to each other, he'd noticed, when they were comforting each other; they preened each other like beautiful, exotic birds. "He will need you to support him, no matter what."

"I'm not even really his sensei anymore," muttered Sakura. "But I just… when I heard, I just couldn't let it… Did I really overstep my bounds, Ino? Was Tsunade-Shishou right to dismiss me?"

Ino took a breath and let it out slowly.

"I think she knows where you're coming from," said Ino, resting her head against Sakura's. "After all, she did the same for you, didn't she?"

"Yeah," sighed Sakura. "Though I—"

Suddenly, Ino stiffened and her head shot around to catch Kakashi's.

Tensing, he lifted a hand. "Yo."

Appraising him, she leaned away from Sakura before giving her friend a look and nodding behind them, in Kakashi's direction. Sakura turned.

His heart pulled when he saw how red and puffy her eyes were.

She had cried for him.

His shoulders slumped.

Ino murmured something to Sakura, who gave her a wan smile and murmured something back before Ino departed. As she passed him, Ino clapped him on the back but said nothing.

And then Sakura forced a smile for him as he stood there. With a deep breath she rose and approached him, too cheerful in her smile that didn't reach her eyes. Even with her scarf covering the lower part of her face, he could tell.

"Ready to spar?" She asked, her voice rough and overly enthusiastic.

He cleared his throat, his hands in his pockets. "I think we'll need to find a new training ground."

Her expression dimmed. "Ah, yeah."

"No."

Sakura's brows furrowed. "Hm?"

"No. I said… I declined. The mission."

And it would have been a lot of money. Enough to have finally been able to pay for an apartment of his own.

But the look of shock on Sakura-sensei's face… and the dawn of hope in her eyes.

"Really?" she whispered.

He nodded.

"Really really?"

He sighed as his shoulders drooped lower. "Hai, sensei—"

And then Sakura's arms were squeezing him too tight, yanking his smaller body against her hard and soft curves, trapping his arms at his sides as she buried her face in his neck; still he felt the warm dampness of her tears through his mask.

"Sensei?"

She shook her head and struggled to find words; her voice shook. "I know I shouldn't interfere. I know you're an excellent shinobi. I have no doubt you'll continue to do amazing things, Kakashi-kun. But… not that. Not yet. Save that, for now, okay? Save it for someone you care about. Who cares about you. At least… at least the first time. Don't let the first time be a mission, okay? I… I know it sounds stupid and sentimental and maybe… maybe a bit girly…" She laugh-coughed as she swallowed. "But… I want you to know love. So many of us, as shinobi, we lose track of things. The most important things. I just… I don't want you to miss out, okay? I won't interfere again, I promise. I just… I'll stop. I'm sorry." She made a humming sound; he realized she had pressed her lips together in a grimace to stem the flow of concern.

With a final squeeze she loosened her arms to let go; until, with a swallow, Kakashi hesitantly lifted his arms up to hug her back. He felt her stiffen in shock before her head dropped down onto his shoulder again and her breath shuddered out from her. She hugged him tight again.

"Hai, Sakura-sensei."

She nodded into his shoulder, then raised her bright eyes to his again. "I suppose I'm not really your sensei anymore, am I? Sorry, I'll learn to respect your boundaries one of these days."

"It's okay," he said, giving her an eye-crease grin from behind his mask (that he'd copied from her). "I'm used to it."

It made her laugh, the sound honest and bubbling up inside and out of her, making her shoulders shake. Her hair tumbled forward, skimming his cheek.

His fingers itched and twitched but he lowered them as she straightened to stand again; like a ghost his fingertips brushed but the very ends of her hair.

"You hungry?"

He shrugged, which made her plant her hands on her hips. "Well, I am," she said. She collected her bag from her feet. "Let's go grab a bite to eat. My treat."

"Hai, Sakura."

He saw her bottom lip wibble for a second before she nodded at him, once. "Right. Well, let's go… Kakashi."

Her hand, which had been reaching over to ruffle his hair as usual, paused in mid-air.

With a sigh, his eyelids drooped and he took a half-step closer. "Last time."

She blushed at him, before grinning widely and ruffling his hair.

"Just making it count," she advised. Finally, the hollow look in her eyes had dissipated.

"Hn," he grunted. Perhaps he had spent a bit more time with the Uchiha—the less stuck-up one—than he would like to admit.

But… it wasn't so bad, he admitted to himself, feeling her fingers comb through his hair at the very end.

* * *

"This is your new team!"

Kakashi looked over the girl with the tattooed cheeks, and the boy with the oversized goggles, and sighed internally.

From behind her desk, Tsunade smirked at him knowingly and gave him a look. It read, clearly, _Be Good._

He looked up at Sakura, who beamed at him… a little wistfully.

"Congratulations, Kakashi. You worked hard. Good job! You're a shinobi Fire will be proud of."

_Goodbye_ , he heard in her voice.

* * *

_(Several months later)_

He was stone.

How had he failed so spectacularly, all in less than a year?

He couldn't save his friends.

He couldn't save his father.

Blinking his still unfamiliar-feeling eye, he had failed himself most of all.

Staring at the cenotaph, the far-too-many names scratched into it, he wondered.

He had his own home, now, though it felt far too big for him and his ninken. He had never realized how big a presence his father had been.

Some time later, he felt a gentle presence at his shoulder; swallowing his sigh at being disturbed, he turned to leave.

The shadow remained there, unmoving, watching him.

"You did not fail them."

Kakashi halted, rooted to the ground.

Uchiha Itachi's soft voice drew his attention once more. "You did not fail any of them. You are an excellent shinobi."

"Did she send you?" he asked, tired, exhausted really, but reluctantly hopeful.

"Hn," Itachi said to the negative.

Kakashi nodded.

"She is due to return in a fortnight." _She is concerned about you,_ went unspoken.

Kakashi couldn't ignore the leap in his chest. "Ah," he replied, nonchalant.

He was almost sure he heard a huff of amusement from the Uchiha. "Practice, Uchiha Training Grounds. Tomorrow."

Kakashi's eyes widened as he looked up at Itachi.

"Your goal is ANBU, correct?"

Kakashi nodded.

"0500 hours," said Itachi.

With a slow swallow, Kakashi agreed. He knew what this meant. Itachi apparently understood his ambition, too.

_He's preparing me to re-join Sakura, since she'd returned to ANBU service when I reached Jounin._

* * *

He'd never admit it, to anyone, but he knew the minute she was back in the village.

—because before she even reported to the Hokage, she had found him and wrapped her arms around him, crushing him to her.

He forced his usual put-upon sigh, even as he scootched his mask up higher to hide his blush.

And, with her back in his life again he noticed colour in the leaves and rivers and skies again.

Perhaps he wasn't entirely alone.

* * *

"You miss him," remarked Itachi as he watched Sakura one night.

"Hmm?" Sakura turned from the stove to look over her shoulder at Itachi. The two of them were dining at her apartment that night. As always, his first stop after visiting the Hokage to report had been Sakura's warm, cozy apartment. It was late evening and Sakura had insisted on him eating something. He protested that she didn't need to, but she'd pushed him onto her couch, and he'd let her. He would never verbally admit he was grateful for such small displays of her fondness, but deep inside he yearned for them.

"Kakashi," he said, his beautiful dark eyes thoughtful. "You miss him."

She shrugged, turning back to the soup she stirred with her chopsticks. "I... " She went silent and smiled to herself. "In a way. I feel like I failed him, not being here when he needed me, though."

It took little time, but some effort, to rise from his spot on her couch to join her in the kitchen. He needed to give her no warning when he stood behind her, his arms loose around her middle. "You couldn't have known. You couldn't have abandoned your post, either." He rested his chin on her shoulder, listening to her breathing.

Sakura sighed.

"He is growing up, and he has no family. My little wolf is all alone," she sighed. Leaning forward just enough, Itachi saw her brow was furrowed; he sensed her worry.

"He is a strong young man. And he has many who care for him," said Itachi, closing his embrace around Sakura so her back pressed into his beating chest. "Come, sit. I will make supper."

"You just got back—"

"And you are exhausted and distracted. Relax." He pulled her away gently, and sat her down on a nearby dining room chair. A moment later he brought his bag over and held out a scroll to her.

Sakura's shoulders tensed. "Itachi, you don't need to keep—"

"Hn," he said, and turned to the stove. The miso had dissolved nicely, and he washed his hands before dicing the tofu into large chunks with deft movements of his hands. On a nearby cutting board, he then sliced the green onions into neat, even rounds. With easy grace he chopped extra vegetables and stir fried them as the tofu heated in the soup.

Sakura sighed. "And now you're the one cooking when you just came back from a mission," she muttered under her breath.

"It is my pleasure," he said quietly, genuinely, and he looked at her with a gentle softness that graced his face so rarely only she ever saw it. His heart sped up a moment in anticipation. He held her gaze a moment, leaning down towards her, his eyes falling closed—

She turned her face away to look at the stove, leaving him pressing a butterfly kiss to her cheek instead of her mouth. He heard her swallow.

Pulling back, he returned to his position at the stove.

They ate quietly, and retired to Sakura's room to sleep. Itachi held her close through the night as their breaths mixed and their hearts beat in opposite rhythms.

* * *

**TBC**

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: HUGE thanks to sleetfall and AijoInu for their beta help! All errors are of course my own. (Point 'em out if you find 'em, please!)
> 
> Your responses to this story continue to amaze me. I'll try and have a new chapter for you in about two weeks or so. April is my birthday month, so expect an extra chapter or so this month, if all goes to plan! Thank you for reading, lovelies, and have a fantastic April!


	4. Age 13: ANBU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kakashi trains for ANBU

#  Chapter 4

 

**(Several months later - age 13 - ANBU)**

 

The dark-haired figure loomed over him, katana blade drawn and glinting in the harsh sun.

 

Sprawled on the powdery, sun dried dirt, his uniform a scarred mess, Kakashi withheld the snarl that threatened to burst from his throat. It would only insult himself. He breathed out slowly, forcing himself to think, cursing himself and his inability to focus.

 

“Again,” said Itachi-taichou from above, forever calm.

 

With a swallow and nod, Kakashi stood, retrieving his scattered kunai with the help of his ninken.

 

Thankfully he’d fallen on his back pocket—padded courtesy Jiraiya-sensei’s latest epic—but his pride smarted.

 

When he and Itachi faced each other once more, he could have sworn he caught a glimmer of amusement in his ken-jutsu sensei’s dark, fathomless eyes.

 

“Ignore distractions,” advised Itachi, his solemn tone tinted.

 

As if Kakashi had asked Sakura to practice her water-jutsu half-naked on the Naka river, across the training ground.

 

He raised his tanto, relaxed his shoulders, expanded his senses to take in the winds around them, the earth at their feet, the water rushing past, coursing down the river. His spinning eye twitched to the left, towards the water again, when Sakura executed a particularly impressive—

 

—he careened backwards, bounced, and choked on dirt for the fourth time that afternoon.    
  
Itachi-taichou sighed.

 

* * *

  
  
He raised a hand as he coincidentally meandered in Sakura’s direction at the market.

 

“Yo.”

 

“Kakashi!” Her eyes lit up like emeralds, her smile widening. “What are you doing shopping on a Friday night? You should be out with your friends.”

 

He shrugged. “A man’s gotta eat.”

 

She shook her head. “And yet your hands are empty.”

 

Damn.

 

“I just got here.”

 

She tilted her head to the side. “Are you hungry? I’m making up my meals for the week tonight; we can double the ingredients and you can take half home. That way it saves you cooking time this coming week. You would only need to heat them up.”

 

“You aren’t going out?”

 

“Hm?” She looked up at him from the vegetable grocer’s wagon. “No, not tonight,” she said, her eyes dimming a bit before brightening again. “I’d rather have company in.”

 

Sold.

 

“What can I help you find?” His fingers formed a small seal and suddenly they were surrounded. His ninken, who’d been hiding in various stalls around them, sallied closer and sat dutifully at Kakashi’s feet. He passed a bit of money into each pup’s collar-pouch, and sent each one off to a different vendor as Sakura rattled off her list, still looking at her vegetables.

 

Her eyes took on a faraway look as she straightened from paying the vegetable vendor. “—and… maybe some dango… but I can get that tomorrow.” 

 

“Sure? Because I have some.” Kakashi held up his prize.

 

Sakura’s eyes widened as she took in the ninken, each one with a grocery bag in its mouth. All their tails wagged. 

 

She blinked. “You are resourceful.”

 

Kakashi nodded. “Hn.”

 

She quirked her head to the side before grinning, and blushing. “You’ve been spending time with Itachi-taichou.”

 

He shrugged. “Supper?”

  
With a laugh she gestured for him to follow her. “No judging me on my housekeeping. I’ve been helping Shishou at the Tower this week, on top of my hospital rounds.”

 

He was going to see inside her apartment. Score.   
  


* * *

 

 

Things between himself and his younger brother were tense, making Itachi mourn the loss of the connection he and Sasuke had shared as young nin. Sasuke turned away from him and stalked back to the family home. Itachi watched him go. As Itachi exited the Clan meeting, however, he told himself that it would all be for the best, in the end.  

 

Many wheels were in motion now, and while he hoped Sasuke would get on board with them soon he was willing to wait his brother out. Few could be as stubborn as his brother.

 

_ Well, perhaps Sakura _ , mused Itachi with a fond smile. It was all for her that he had done what he did. Then, and now.

 

The Elders’ words circled in his mind, and he let out a small breath as he made his way to Sakura’s apartment. He had cancelled their earlier plans when the Clan summoned him for the impromptu meeting. On his way to join her, later than expected, he gathered a few groceries to make supper for the two of them along with some flowers, and paused on her balcony when he felt the additional chakra signature inside.

 

And the happiness bubbling between them.

 

_ A child. He’s a mere child, _ he reminded himself calmly when fire simmered inside him.

 

_ He doesn’t look at her with the eyes of a child, _ another part of himself recognized with savage accuracy.

 

Itachi’s heart was soothed as he remembered that nothing could come of the bond between the two.

 

And, after all, the Elders had made it clear what was expected of him sooner rather than later; Sakura knew it, too.

 

* * *

**TBC**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay; April got away from me! Many thanks, as always, to Sleetfallrain and AijoInu for their help with this story. (All errors remain my own.)
> 
> As it is my birthday tomorrow, I'll try and get another chapter of *something* ready for you tonight to enjoy. *wipes sweat from brow* If you need more to chew on in the meantime, I post new stories twice a week on my tumblr ("Fluff Friday" and "Smut Monday"), and my username is 'beyondthemoor'. Come say hi!
> 
> Happy reading!


	5. ANBU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ANBU mission together

**CHAPTER 5**

**(A year later - age 14 - ANBU)**

A mission.

A mission together.

_Finally_ , he breathed inside.

As he stood before his Hokage's desk, his inu-ANBU mask in place, he felt a special energy buzzing through his veins. Finally, finally, they were comrades. On equal footing.

She would have to acknowledge him. He would prove it to her.

"—and Sakura, you'll be taking a non-participatory role, as medic. With this group, the chance is low, but if it does happen, it could be devastating. And Inu?"

Kakashi straightened.

"Keep your ninken's role to a minimum, if possible. They're good, but they're inexperienced in this type of mission; they'll protect you at all costs, and they need to learn to obey another's orders, too."

He nodded slowly before speaking. "They listen to another on this team."

The Hokage's brow lifted; she turned her cognac eyes on Itachi. He shook his head 'no'. She looked back at Kakashi, nodding her chin before her eyes settled on Sakura. Kakashi nodded.

"Really?" said the Hokage, her tone interested. Her lips curled in a knowing smile.

Kakashi wasn't sure what to think when she turned those eyes on Sakura, her brow arching again. "Crows and dogs? Can you control a man's snake, too?"

The ANBU to Kakashi's other side stiffened, and Kakashi clenched his teeth. Sasuke. Of course he was on a team with two Uchihas.

He'd also understood the Hokage's innuendo. Unfortunately. (Unfortunately for Sasuke, that is; Kakashi was going to get him, someday.)

"Shishou," muttered Sakura; her cheeks would be burning, he knew. He recognized her tone.

The Hokage chuckled, her eyes sparkling. "I'm teasing," she said with a wave of her manicured, calloused hand. "Sundown, be at the gates."

They nodded, bowed, and departed.

* * *

"Viper, Inu, west entrance; I will take the north entrance." Itachi's crimson eyes, behind his mask, flickered to Sakura. She nodded at him. He nodded back.

Kakashi looked at Sakura. She had separate instructions?

Hadn't the Hokage given her non-confrontation directives?

Sasuke set out, and Kakashi followed, glancing behind him once. From the corner of his eye he saw Sakura and Itachi looking at each other; Itachi lifting a hand to touch Sakura's arm—

—some instinct had Kakashi leaping and spinning to the side, kunai raised, fending off the non-lethal strike.

"Hn. Come on," said Sasuke, lowering his katana blade. He re-sheathed it and turned back on his way to the west entrance to the warlord's base.

Frowning at him, Kakashi's eyes narrowed. He resisted the urge to turn back and look again, but just barely.

The fighting, when they engaged, was brutal. He was confident in his skills and as ruthless as Itachi and Sakura had trained him to be. After all Itachi's assistance he'd found most of the battle challenging, but not overwhelming. It wasn't long before they had released the captives-turned-slaves and transported them to the waiting medical team camped not far away. From there the chunin and jounin would handle things.

On their return trip to Konoha, they stopped at an inn for the night at Sakura's insistence. To Kakashi's surprise, Itachi nodded and agreed to the small luxury.

Looking up at Sakura, whose uniform was messier than usual, Kakashi's nose twitched. "The blood smells different. Were they sick?"

His colleagues stiffened and Sakura gave him a forced smile. "They were pretty trashy. I'll go shower upstairs and join you when I'm ready. Keep them out of trouble for me, Kakashi!" she'd called with a laugh as she'd closed the door to her room and sealed it.

The Uchiha nodded and Kakashi waved goodbye as they parted at the stairs. Kakashi wanted to ignore Sasuke, but a part of him didn't want to disappoint Itachi-taichou by being rude to his younger brother.

Kakashi looked sixteen and had he been a civilian he likely wouldn't have made it past the door to the inn's tavern; but no one questioned Uchihas, especially not these two Uchihas. He had followed Itachi and Sasuke in at their invitation.

"You didn't use your ninken," remarked Sasuke as the men sat around a table, waiting for Sakura.

"They weren't worth it," said Kakashi, wrapping his hands around his tea.

Sasuke's dark eyes remained on him; Kakashi ignored him.

"What was Sakura doing?" he asked, looking between the brothers.

Sasuke looked at Itachi and waited.

"She had alternate orders," said Itachi, taking a sip of his tea.

Kakashi's eyelids lowered. Sasuke scoffed.

"He'll figure it out. He isn't stupid," said Sasuke in a low voice. It surprised Kakashi; Sasuke didn't vouch for him often. Ever. He looked between the two. He wouldn't say they were uncomfortable, exactly, but there was something about what Sakura had done, was doing, that they didn't want him to know.

"It is not for us to discuss, especially here," said Itachi.

"He's just going to dig deeper," said Sasuke, setting his cup down on the table.

Itachi ignored them and scanned the room. "She is coming."

As always, when Sakura joined them the awkward mood lifted and soon she had them relaxed, kidding and teasing each other—even Itachi loosened enough to share a carafe of warm saké—and Kakashi unwound along with them. He accepted some of Sakura's saké and after several rounds felt his limbs warm and languid swing looser and less restrained.

"You did that on purpose," he vaguely heard Sasuke say as someone carried him upstairs, their arms around his waist to help him walk. "I appreciate what you're doing, but… he'll figure it out. This only delays the inevitable."

"Let me have this, just a little longer," he heard Sakura say; she was the one who'd taken his arm around the back of her neck and had her arm around his waist. Keeping him upright.

Sasuke sighed. "Itachi wasn't going to tell him anything."

"I asked him not to."

"If he's a member of the team, he'll figure it out sooner or later. The only reason he didn't today is—"

"I know."

"He won't stay like this forever. I'm surprised he's lasted this long. You'd think some of the others his age would have made an offer by now."

"I don't think he spends much time with them."

_I do, too,_ thought Kakashi hazily. _Sometimes. Genma and Gai weren't too bad._

"Hn. You know why."

"Sasuke—"

They climbed the stairs to get to their rooms. His head was so foggy. He could barely put his feet in front of the other. Why did this conversation have to sound so clear when he could barely keep his eyes open?

"You know why, Sakura. You could at least be upfront about it."

There was a heartbeat of silence before she replied, quietly. "It's a crush. It's nothing. It'll pass."

Sasuke's voice hardened. "A crush wouldn't have motivated him to enlist in ANBU and three years of ken-jutsu training with Itachi, Sakura. He's the first student to make it past six months with him."

"He's dedicated. He's an excellent shinobi, on par with you and Itachi."

"Is that why you keep him so close? Because of who he reminds you of?"

The arms around him stiffened.

Sasuke blew out a low breath. "That was…"

"Uncalled for," said Sakura, her voice hollow.

They whispered now, as they walked down the hall to their rooms. He made out less and less of their conversation.

"... things were different…"

"... leave the Clan…"

"... prodigies make mistakes, too…"

Kakashi felt himself gently lifted into a bed, his feet released from their nin-sandals, a soft blanket pulled over him. A hand ruffling his hair before it drifted away. Distantly he recognized the tingle of chakra flowing through him, relaxing him further. Sakura's chakra.

"'night, S'kura," he murmured, eyes long closed.

"Goodnight, Kakashi. I'll heal your hangover in the morning, okay?"

"Mm-hmm," he said, smiling in his sleep. He reached out blindly and rubbed her hand against his cheek. Then darkness enveloped him in its warm embrace and he dozed off with a soft snore.

From the doorway, Sasuke sighed. "He's still a kid," he said, not unkindly.

Sakura squeezed Kakashi's hand before slipping free of his grasp and closing the door behind her.

"He's innocent," said Itachi, coming up behind them in the hallway.

"He's lost everyone who's ever been close to him. Is it any wonder he trains so hard?" said Sakura as they entered the other bedroom, belonging to Sakura.

"Not everyone," said Itachi. Sakura remained silent, her face drawn. He looked at her, his expression softening around his eyes and mouth. "You need to rest."

"I'm fine; is there anything you two need? I didn't see any wounds when we left, but was there any internal damage?"

"His left lung took a hit, and his kidney," said Sasuke.

Itachi narrowed his eyes at Sasuke, who merely smirked at him when Sakura slapped Itachi on the arm.

"For kami's sake…" Her hands were already channeling chakra. "Don't think you're off the hook," she said, skipping her eyes over to Sasuke's.

He leaned back with his hands behind his head, letting out a sigh as he stretched out on Sakura's bed.

"Yeah, yeah," he said, swallowing a yawn. He blinked open an eye to look at her, then his brother.

* * *

**Several weeks later**

It was the middle of the afternoon, in the middle of the road, in the middle of the village.

And two strange men with strange expressions were accosting him.

In front of everyone.

"Hellooo there, Kakashi!"

"What a pleasure, to meet the young shinobi who has so captured our Sakura's every protective instinct in her heart!"

Kakashi's heart skipped even as his eyelids drooped. He knew these two.

"What do you want?"

The man with the wild white mane merely grinned and clapped a large, muscled arm around his shoulder. On his other side, Naruto ruffled his hair.

"We're here to take you to a land of mystery and pleasure!" boomed Jiraiya.

"I'm not paying."

Naruto stiffened while Jiraiya laughed louder. "Boy, they'll be wanting to pay you by the time we finish your education!"

"Education?"

Naruto grinned at him and winked.

"With the ladies!" Naruto waggled his eyebrows.

What?

Kakashi dug in his heels; Jiraiya dragged him along in a headlock.

"Prepare to be astounded by the most beautiful treasures to be found in the Land of Fire!"

* * *

It was three days later before Jiraiya and Naruto dropped Kakashi back off at his home. He was walking under his own steam—this time—luckily but he wasn't sure when his eyelids would return to their normal half-lowered position.

His heart was still… uncomfortable.

When they had locked him in the room with the dozen beautiful women, calling out to them all, "Make him a man, ladies!" and he'd had to choose…

He swallowed.

" _No one will know," she'd whispered in his ear when he'd met the cerulean eyes of a lovely girl. "We can change what we look like, did they tell you? One word, that's all it takes."_

His heart had wanted to escape his chest; his stomach had tightened into knots.

She had reached out to touch his cheek above his mask, and smiled at him when he stood there.

" _We can do whatever you want to. No one has to know."_

Her thumb smoothed across the line of his scar, across his closed eye, hiding his secret.

She took his hand and brought it to her silk robe, inching closer to him.

" _I can show you, teach you anything you want to know."_

He swallowed and lifted his hand to caress the side of her face, his brow pinched, his insides conflicted.

_Save some things for love,_ she'd said.

_... No one has to know..._

The young woman, older than him by half a dozen years, smiled at him softly; she clasped a smooth, soft hand over his, turning her face into his rough palm.

When she turned her bright eyes back to him, full of warmth and understanding, he brushed a thumb over her eyelid, gentler than a butterfly wing.

He breathed, one word, his voice trembling and hoarse.

The instant they changed, his breath caught.

Then he tore down his mask and dove in, his Sharingan whirling.

**TBC**

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: You have no idea how much it means to me when you leave a review! Thank you to everyone who's enjoying this story and leaving a comment behind! Also, thank you to everyone who left me birthday wishes, whether here or on my tumblr. You are so wonderful!


	6. Age 16: ANBU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Negotiation, and a painful step to coming of age.

**Chapter 6**

**(Later - age 16 - ANBU)**

The evening was turning to night when he heard Naruto yelling and pounding on Sasuke's door at the Main Family Residence on the Uchiha clan compound. His fists clenched, Sasuke glared at the door before nodding to Kakashi.

"Grab a drink, this could take a while."

Nodding, Kakashi glanced at the strategies spread across the table.

Sasuke sniffed with derision, shaking his head. "Trust me, he won't be able to make heads or tails out of this."

"What if he spills something on it."

Sasuke's eyelids lowered. "Roll it," he said, but Kakashi was already done and had propped it up in a corner. Sasuke shook his head at Kakashi's initiative and huffed a laugh.

"Tea," said Kakashi, hand already on the window frame of the Uchiha residence where Sasuke had his own wing. Sasuke nodded, before Kakashi leapt up onto the roof, pattering towards the kitchen on the other side of the residence.

—until he heard what Naruto came to yell about.

"—gotta help me, she's really going to kill me this time!"

"Idiot, calm down. Who's going to kill you?"

"Sakura! Pervy-Sage's next book—he-he-he—"

"Spit it out," growled Sasuke.

"Sakura's the female lead; and he's basing the male lead on Kakashi… younger guy getting an older woman… oh kami, I'm a dead man. I never should have listened to—"

Up on the rooftop, Kakashi's eyes bulged. Should never have listened to who?

"Shut. Up."

"Mrphf-mrphg!"

Someone had covered Naruto's mouth in haste, and Kakashi had a feeling the reason had to do with himself. He could feel Sasuke's malevolent chakra seeping out from the room through the surrounding walls.

So could someone else.

"Sasuke, what's going on?" came a familiar feminine voice. "Are you okay? What's wrong?"

In that instant Kakashi's heart tripped.

Sakura had been in the house? Where?

"Calm yourself, explain," ordered Itachi, joining them. There was a heartbeat before he then said, "Naruto. Perhaps this should be discussed at a later time."

"Mrpghpgh-mrphgposhgsh!"

"Sasuke, take your hand off his mouth," ordered Sakura.

Kakashi crept closer, until he was on the roof just above the four gathered in Sasuke's room.

"This isn't the time," Sasuke said evenly.

"I agree," said Itachi.

"What are you talking about? Sasuke's chakra flared like a tag-bomb and Naruto's screaming about something or other, and… what's going on? Damnit, would you two stop eye-talking! That's so annoying," snapped Sakura. Kakashi heard her moving through the room and heard a small struggle before Sasuke hissed, and Naruto gasped, sucking in deep breaths. "Damn Uchihas," she muttered.

"Thank you!"

"Talk," she ordered.

"No," said the Uchiha in unison.

Kakashi could easily imagine Naruto looking between everyone in the room as he stuttered, "Uhhhhh…."

The room went quiet, for several minutes.

"This is all your fault," said Sasuke after some kind of small scuffle broke out again. "And you should have told him sooner."

"What are you—"

"Haruno," said Itachi. "Have you spoken to Kakashi about personal matters?"

Personal matters, wondered Kakashi. What personal matters?

"No," answered Sakura.

"What some of your work as a kunoichi entails?" Itachi's voice was clipped and sharp.

"He's aware of what kunoichi work entails."

"Does he know that you engage in it?" He pushed on.

A loud swallow, so audible Kakashi could make it out even through the open window. "That has not been discussed, Taichou."

And Kakashi's nails dug into the roof tiles at his commander's voice when he next spoke, because he'd never heard his Taichou sound so concerned, and compassionate and… loving.

"Sakura," he began, and Kakashi heard his heavier footsteps moving towards the window where Sakura stood. Yet Sakura moved away from him, as the sounds of cloth-against-cloth sifted up to Kakashi's spy-point on the roof.

"I will make a point of speaking to him this week," she said, her voice even and distant. "Taichou."

"That wasn't an order—" broke in Itachi, but Kakashi could already make out the sounds of Sakura's slower footsteps leaving the room.

"I'd best go. Have a good evening, Taichou. Naruto, Sasuke," she said, and Kakashi made out the faint click as Sasuke's door closed behind her. Three chakra signatures remained.

He was debating whether he should follow her when he heard Naruto babbling again.

"I never thought he'd do this. You gotta help me; she'll kill me when she finds out."

"I'll speak to Jiraiya," said Itachi. "Perhaps he can be persuaded."

Naruto snorted. "Yeah, right. You just barely talked him out of his last one about you and Sakura; he still has that manuscript. You had to call in Tsunade. He's not letting go of this one, Itachi. You never should have had him take Kakashi out to that brothel."

"You did what?" Sasuke's chakra had flared again; and for the first time his fury was directed at his brother.

"You said you were going to tell him!" Naruto panicked. "I thought he knew!"

"You asked Jiraiya to do that? He didn't do it on his own?"

"He was in ANBU; he had to learn his way around—"

"Knowing full well what Sakura did to herself to protect him, and you did that?"

Upon the rooftop, Kakashi's breath faltered.

"It was to protect him; he was still too easily distracted. It cleared his mind."

"Did you tell her what you did?"

Silence.

"Did you tell her?" repeated Sasuke.

"She recognized the change in him."

"You two-faced, underhanded piece of—no, let go, Naruto. He deserves it!"

"I'll speak to Jiraiya," was all Itachi said as he, too, left.

_Not if I get there first,_ thought Kakashi, as he leapt from rooftop to rooftop.

* * *

Kakashi made one stop before reaching Jiraiya's studio.

It was very early in the morning when he knocked on Sakura's living room window.

"Hey," mumbled Sakura, pushing her loose hair from her scarf-covered face. She pulled her bathrobe closer around herself. "You okay?" She let him in.

His heart in his throat, he nodded as he closed the window behind him.

Her tired eyes sagging, she waited.

"I know," he blurted, quietly. His hands at his sides, he flexed and relaxed his fingers.

"You know," she repeated, half asleep.

He almost sighed at his poor timing. But, in a way, it would never be the right time, would it? This conversation had to happen for them to move forward and it would be painful for both of them. Yet they had to debride the wound that festered between them as they both tiptoed around it.

He tried again. "I already know. About what Itachi said tonight. I already know."

Sakura's listing head stopped moving as her eyes narrowed on him. She straightened, and her arms crossed in front of her.

"I've known for a long time," he added, holding her gaze.

The heat in her eyes dimmed, as did the small amount of light reflecting in them as the lines around her eyes fell, her shoulders slumping. He heard her swallow.

"I've known for a long time and never judged you."

She tried to look away, but Kakashi took her hand.

"Ever. You could never… in my eyes…" He fumbled for words. He was bad with words and comfort, and it made him feel insecure, somehow fractured and unfinished inside. He hated feeling insecure especially around Sakura because if he was insecure around her then obviously he wasn't mature enough, strong enough, good enough yet, and—.

He took a breath to calm his racing insecurities. "You still burn as brightly in my eyes now as you ever did as my sensei. You will never stop shining like a star to me."

Sakura's breath hitched as she trembled in his hand.

Unsure of what else to do and calling himself a fool a hundred times over, Kakashi reached for her and pulled her into his arms. She started for a moment before melting into him, making his heart and insides whole and warm. Relief pulsed through him, balanced by joy as he cherished the fact she had not pushed him away; even more that he was able to comfort her in her time of need.

It was a particular form of male pride he took in that accomplishment.

"Don't ever be ashamed around me," he whispered. "A woman who can heal, who can comfort, who can destroy mountains with her palms, should never be ashamed."

He heard her sniffle into his hair as she embraced him in return.

"You never said anything," she said quietly, voice cracking.

He shook his head. "It never mattered to me." He rubbed her back. "Don't hide things from me anymore. I'm not a kid."

She chuckled against him. "You'll always be my favourite little student."

Kakashi's jaw clenched, and inside the protection of his arms he felt Sakura stiffen; he closed his eyes knowing she'd felt him react. Such strides he'd made, yet he still projected his immaturity in spite of himself. Why did it always have to be around her?

But the way her arms remained wrapped around him confirmed she took comfort from him as a friend and colleague now, and he gambled, taking a moment to remind her of this.

"I haven't been your student for a long time," he murmured, voice low as he drew back.

Emboldened, he let his touch linger on her arms as he stood and looked her over. Her red, swollen eyes, her messy hair, her worn bathrobe. Her cute bare feet, peeking out from below.

But what caught his eye was the light in Sakura's eyes; the light was back. There was a new curiosity behind it, though.

He smiled at her from behind his mask, letting it crease his eyes. "Sleep well, Sakura."

With that he left through the window.

* * *

**(At Jiraiya's)**

"And here," pointed out Kakashi, holding a pen over the page in question. "She wouldn't say that. She would ruffle my hair and…"

"Hai, hai, hai!" Jiraiya scribbled across the page in red ink. "What else?"

Kakashi flipped through a few pages before pausing. "Here."

Jiraiya squinted. "The illustration?"

"Ah. It goes."

"Eh!? No way! It took me days to get her proportions right!"

Kakashi reached for his hitai-ate and Jiraiya laughed and threw up his hands. "But what do artists know? Nothing! I'll pull that one out."

"No replacing it."

"Oh, I'm sure we could come to an agreement."

Kakashi lifted his forehead protector an inch, revealing the bottom-most tomoe...

"Fine, fine!" Jiraiya wilted. "You drive a hard bargain, kid."

Kakashi gave him a grin that creased his eyes. "Glad we have an agreement. I'll also be requiring the sketches you took of Sakura without her permission."

Jiraiya leered at him. "I thought you would. I had them bound for you."

Sighing, Kakashi shook his head, but his cheeks didn't burn the way they would have prior to his 'education', several years before.

"You get this on one condition," said Jiraiya, holding up the leather-bound treasure.

Kakashi's stare was baleful.

"Oh, come on! Give an old man his whims," he grinned at Kakashi. "All the girl would say was that you only asked her to change one feature. What was it? That place wasn't cheap, you know. They're very discreet."

"And yet you grilled her about me. You need a life."

"Try harder. That was lousy misdirection."

Jiraiya wiggled the book in the air, cracking it open to eye the sketches. "Now, this one in particular is a favourite—"

Kakashi's hand shot out and he slammed the book shut, glaring at Jiraiya.

Jaw clenched, he took a breath.

"What else do you want?"

"Come on, kid, it's a simple question."

"What else?"

Jiraiya pouted and tugged on the book but Kakashi held firm.

"Did you go all the way with her? She cost me the advance on this book."

He was going to crack his teeth to pieces, he thought, dealing with this man.

"Green," he bit out between his teeth. He hated the traitorous admission. "Her eyes. Green."

With a final tug he ripped the book of sketches from Jiraiya and pointed his chin at the manuscript.

"You'll make the changes before you release it?"

"Absolutely. Advanced reader copy to you? It'll be complimentary."

Kakashi nodded.

"Nice doing business with you, kid."

Kakashi had already disappeared, which left Jiraiya with a hand rubbing his chin as he leaned back in his chair.

_Her eyes, huh? The better to see him with_ , he supposed. His leer softened to a grin.

The kid saw Sakura with his heart.

**TBC.**

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Thank you all for reading! As always, I couldn't have put this story together without the wonderful, patient help of sleetfallrain and AijoInu. Feel free to visit me on tumblr if you're looking for more fic. We have Smut Mondays and Fluff Fridays, and there's usually an UchihaSaku or KakaSaku of some sort that pops up! Cheers, and happy June!


	7. Age 16-17: ANBU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto suggests Sakura get a new Genin team

**Chapter 7**

**(ANBU - Age 16 turning 17)**

_(Several months later, in October)_

His long legs stretched out in front of him, his face covered by one of his favourite books, Kakashi snoozed on the living room couch in Sakura's apartment.

"I thought you said you were going out with Genma and Gai tonight," called Sakura from the kitchen. She put her groceries down and began putting them away.

"Hm? Ah. Yeah."

"Shouldn't you go get ready?"

"Hm." They would find him.

Sakura laughed. "This is supposed to be your birthday celebration, isn't it?"

"Mmm-hmm."

Did she have to remind Kakashi? He knew. He knew it just as he knew about the teetering shelves full of scrolls Itachi had given her, and the expensive, foreign cosmetics Itachi had surprised her with in her apartment on her vanity and the forbidden jutsu Itachi had taught her, and the mountain of scarves, shawls, neck protectors and high-collared cloaks Kakashi cursed because they all hid her face from him. Not that he was focused on her face; but the mystery…

"Are you doing anything special?" She called to him from behind a pantry door.

Kakashi considered Genma's go-to solution for all celebratory, conciliatory and purgatory needs.

"The Rusty Kunai," he answered.

He almost smiled beneath the book's cover when he next heard her voice. He recognized the sound her voice made when her lips twisted like that.

A jug settled onto a shelf. "If… that's where you want to go to celebrate your age of majority…"

No. No it wasn't where he wanted to go. But he was one step closer. Soon.

He felt the warmth of her body heat behind him as she stood behind the couch.

"Is that a new one?"

"Yes." She meant his book.

"Is it any good?"

Kakashi swallowed his happy, yearning sigh.

"The best."

His skin tingled as he felt a current of air pass over his head.

For a split second he lamented the fact that he was no longer his childhood self, able to step closer to her—reluctantly, of course—to feel her fingers carding through his hair.

Instead he sat unmoving, hopeful, desperate.

From the kitchen the kettle whistled on the stove.

Her hand dropped away.

"Is there anything else you want for your birthday?" she asked, moving back to the kitchen to pour tea.

_A large box to pile Itachi's clutter in,_ he thought to himself.

"Hm, not really," he lied.

He heard her chuckle from behind him, then his heart dropped through to the soles of his feet as the tip of his book was lifted and he felt the press of her soft lips against his forehead.

"Then have a kiss for luck," she said. "Tonight with the girls."

His fingers clenched on his thigh and he swallowed as he struggled to remain still.

There was a knock at the door before someone let themselves in. He knew who it was before it opened.

"Yo." He lifted a hand.

"Your friends are looking for you," said Itachi.

Kakashi sighed as Sakura chuckled and said, "I told you."

"Yeah," he said, pulling the book down from its perch on his face.

Itachi, he noted, was watching him; more specifically, he was watching the book.

His dark eyes met Itachi's, his face expressionless.

And perhaps Kakashi had a deathwish, for in that moment he smirked at Itachi, tucking " _A Young Man's Fancy"_ by Jiraiya into his breast pocket, right over his heart.

It was a bestseller.

* * *

_(A few weeks later)_

The early evening light dwindled as Sakura sat at a tall stool at Ichiraku, her feet tucked beneath her. Sasuke sat to her left, Naruto to her right.

"Another team?" She looked up at Naruto. "Of Genin?"

Naruto swapped his empty bowl for a fresh one.

"Yeah. I mean, Kakashi is the youngest ANBU to ever graduate, Itachi excepted. Now that he's met people who are more on his level in ANBU the kid's finally showing signs of acceptable socialization—usually it's the reverse order, but whatever—and Itachi's pegged as a contender for next Hokage, which means your team's likely going to be broken up again. You should see if they need instructors at the Academy, like last time. Iruka asked me the other day if you'd be up for taking on individual students for extra study or training. I think he wants to learn some of your teaching methods. He'd be a great sensei. I saw him talking to Kakashi the other day and he didn't storm off in a huff. It was a good sign. If anyone can get through to the tough cases, it's you. Kakashi's proof of that."

"You talk about Kakashi like he was some kind of enfant terrible," remarked Sakura, resting her hand on the edge of the counter.

From her left, Sasuke scoffed under his breath.

Sakura narrowed her eyes at him. "What?"

"He was. And he still is. You're the only one he listens to, outside the Hokage."

"That's not true. He listens to his superiors, in ANBU." Her brow furrowed. "Although…"

Sasuke grunted in agreement.

She turned to look at Naruto; he was rubbing the back of his neck, his whiskered cheeks burning.

"Sasuke kind of has a point, Sakura. Few teams are willing to work with him; fewer were willing to work with him at all when he was at the Academy. I think, without you, things would have been very different."

"What do you mean?" she asked, but her imagination had already followed Naruto's insinuation.

No bonds or connections. No family. Very few friends. Young and high-strung, precocious, unconventional resolutioning; all signs of high intelligence. His strategies were unusual and yet always sound. He had only ever failed one mission, to her knowledge. It remained a tender point in her own record that she'd been away when he'd likely needed her most.

Still.

She pressed her lips together. So he'd had a rough start, and not everyone could keep up with him. He refused to lower his standards for others and expected the same dedication, effort and skill from others that he demanded of himself. It was one of the reasons she had paired him with Itachi, after all. They were quite similar in that respect.

But where Itachi had family and unconditional, loving support…

Her eyes caught the mirror behind the cook counter and stared back at her uncomfortably over the top of her ever-present scarf. A gesture she thought she'd quelled a hundred times surged through her fingers and for the first time in years, Sakura reached up to tug the scarf higher. She swallowed and turned away from her reflection. She knew it never fell below the bridge of her nose, however insecurities were horrible imaginary trouble-makers.

Her Kakashi was a lone young wolf. A very protective one towards those he cared about, but it was such a very small pack, and that concerned her. Outside of Genma and Gai, and now that Naruto mentioned it, Iruka, had she ever seen him with anyone else? Had he dated much? Did he go out with men? She knew he and Sasuke occasionally worked together on projects for the Hokage, as part of the Intelligence division. Neither had ever given her an inkling they were interested in each other that way, though.

Sasuke was happy to enjoy either side of the fence (or both, according to one persistent rumour), but she hadn't heard of anything happening between him and Kakashi. She considered the possibility before moving on; no, Kakashi wasn't a typical gentleman but he was attentive to the opposite sex regardless of how diligently he practiced his nonreactions.

Who else did he associate with, voluntarily? Anyone? To her knowledge, Kakashi had stopped seeking Itachi out ages ago (though she'd never been given a clear answer as to what happened between the two of them or why they drifted). For a long time, she thought the two of them might bond; and through Kakashi's chunin and jounin years, she was sure they had. Their unspoken falling out was so odd; she still had no idea what had changed between them, or whether it was a personal or professional issue. Neither had mentioned it to her or sought her opinion or help when she had reached out to them.

After losing her own family in the previous ninja war when she had been a child, Sakura had leaned heavily on Naruto and Sasuke as her adopted kin.

Who had Kakashi...

Her cheeks warmed as she realized now whom Kakashi had turned to, or at least, not pushed away, when he had needed comfort.

Her shoulders drooped.

Really, that was her need, wasn't it? The way she needed reinforcement, the way she needed the comfort of knowing she could comfort others. Especially after she'd failed so completely, years ago.

The skin on her throat tingled and burned. Her fingers reached up and twitched at the upper seam of the scarf again; her eyes widened when she felt two large, male hands descend warmly upon hers; one from each of her best friends.

"More of the Academy kids, especially those who fall a little outside the norm, could use a teacher like you," said Naruto. He clasped her hand before he pulled it away from her scarf.

Sasuke tapped one finger upon hers, and she lowered her other hand. Sasuke nodded as if to himself.

"You've been a good influence on him."

"The best," said Naruto, giving her a soft smile. He still held her hand in his, now in his lap. A gentle squeezed passed from his fingers to hers. He glanced at her scarf, in the direction of her throat. "No one will judge you if you—"

"Naruto." Sasuke's eyes shot to his friend's, his frown menacing.

Naruto sighed. "Twenty years. I'm just saying, it wouldn't be so bad. People would adjust pretty quickly."

Her shoulders had lifted up to her ears and she'd curled into herself, shaking her head.

"It's okay. You mean well. Thank you, Naruto," she said, giving him an eye-crease smile.

"It looked kind of beautiful," said Naruto quietly, pushing a finger against the counter as he tried to catch Sakura's eye.

On her other side, Sasuke sighed and pushed away from the counter, standing.

"It's supposed to be," he said, voice soft and resigned. He gave Sakura a gentle look, one rarely addressed to anyone else.

"I'm fine. Just a little thoughtful tonight," she assured him.

"Hn. Don't overthink things," he grunted, setting money on the counter before he walked away.

She and Naruto were quiet as they finished their own supper.

"I think you're too good a person sometimes, Sakura-chan," said Naruto as he poked around his empty bowl.

"Hm?"

He shook his head. "You're too nice. People take advantage of that. Tsunade does; your team does. I know you'll deny it, but your team is the worst for it. One member in particular."

She let out a low breath and dropped her hands into her lap, no longer feigning interest in her meal. Naruto turned towards her to face her, his large blue eyes earnest.

"I think my patients are the ones who take advantage of it," she said, aiming for levity, but Naruto's lips pressed into a thin white line as he held back his retort. His fingers twisted into loose fists.

"You're a better person than I am, not holding it against him," he said in a low voice, "but you don't owe him any favours, Sakura. You can request a different team. You can get a Genin team again. You can walk away from him. He's a grown man and he has to learn to be accountable for his mistakes."

She shook her head. "I'm fine. I got used to this a long, long time ago."

"But you shouldn't have had to!"

"It's my life, I can choose how I want it to be, and who I want in it."

"When it comes to Itachi, and he's not only the Uchiha clan heir but also your commanding officer, I think you need a little distance and perspective!"

"It isn't that simple, Naruto, it—Itachi?" Her brow furrowed. That wasn't what she'd been expecting Naruto to say.

"Yeah! It is that simple, and I think taking a break from him again is a good idea. You were so much happier when you were mentoring Kakashi, even if it was only for a while. Maybe ANBU is part of it, too. But you need to get out more, Sakura-chan. When you're on Itachi's team, it just feels like he dominates all your time, whether you're working or not. He's a constant presence around you. Have you been on a single date since you rejoined ANBU?"

Sakura tried to smile, but an awkward discomfort had settled in her gut, writhing as Naruto continued.

"He feels guilty about what happened, Naruto, and he keeps trying to make it up to me; and I really am too busy to go out and date. It would be more awkward than anything else if I did, especially since…" She bit down lightly on the inside of her cheek before taking a deep breath. She met his gaze and gave him a shrug. "I'm not really up for dating." She cleared her throat, looked away. "I don't think I ever really will be," she added quietly.

Naruto's shoulders fell as he looked at her, crestfallen.

She swallowed down the lump that had risen, pushing in her chair as she stood.

"Thanks for inviting me out tonight. It was good to see you again. I've missed you," she said, staring at the ground. "I'll see you later."

Her escape path was blocked by a pair of warm orange arms that gently pulled her into a hug.

"Don't push me away. I'm sorry I upset you," he whispered into her ear. He rubbed her back with his wide, rough palms, feeling her trembling.

Some of her stiffness melted away, but only slightly. She backed away from his embrace before nodding quickly. "S'okay. Later," she said with false cheer.

Naruto watched her go. He left enough money to cover their meals before turning to leave; out of the corner of his eye he saw a shadow dart past and follow Sakura. Instinctively he followed until he recognized it.

His pace slowed and he relaxed, heading home.

* * *

She ignored the scratching at her door, but the whimpering was too much.

Setting her tea on the coffee table, Sakura opened her apartment door and looked around, puzzled.

"Down here," came a gruff voice.

Her brows jumped up.

"Pakkun? What's wrong?" Her grip clenched on the doorframe. "Is Kakashi—"

"May I come in?"

She paused, regaining her composure at his casual request. "Oh, um, yes, please make yourself at home..."

She closed the door as the pug made himself a little snug-spot on her couch.

He turned around twice before settling in, his head resting on his paws. She resumed her own place beside him. She smiled when he leaned over and put his head in her lap. She began to pet him fondly.

"What brings you to my neck of the woods?"

"Hmph? What's the name of your shampoo again?"

"Wildwood strawberry."

"Ah. I'll remind Kakashi. He got the wrong one last week."

She swallowed. What a strange day this had been.

"Keep petting," said Pakkun.

_Right, sorry,_ thought Sakura, her fingers returning to his short, fawn coat.

She sighed to herself, letting her thoughts wander. Within an hour or so she retired to her room to sleep and Pakkun jumped up onto her bed to join her.

"Staying the night?" she asked with a yawn.

"Your bed's comfy."

Fully relaxed, she laughed, scratching him behind the ears. "If you say so."

He turned around twice before snuggling up to her side. Within a few minutes he was snoring like a boar hound, his legs twitching as he chased some invisible creature in his sleep.

Her mood and heart lighter, Sakura smiled to herself and lay back, closing her eyes.

Pakkun was an amazing ninken. She would have to thank Kakashi for letting him stay the night.

From his place atop her roof, Kakashi sensed her chakra signature even out in sleep before he stood with a stretch, returning home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Thank you for reading, lovelies! Sorry for the delay; if you've been reading my tumblr, you already know about my accident. The good news is that my shoulder and wrist are pretty much healed and I'm back to writing again. I'm catching up on my updates now and will do my very best to get another one out this month, time permitting. Thank you to everyone who wished me a speedy recovery—it worked!
> 
> As always, HUGE thanks to AijoInu and sleetfallrain for their help with this chapter.
> 
> Have a wonderful summer, and please let me know what you thought of the chapter. Take care!


	8. Age 18: ANBU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The trip

**Chapter 8 - ANBU - Age 18**

**(In the spring - Age 18 - ANBU)**

They passed through the gates and Sasuke's eyes flickered to Sakura's half-turned frame. "We'll be back in time."

Sakura's brow drew together as she looked back at Naruto and waved at him. He remained behind in Konoha with his latest genin team who were horsing around behind him.

"We won't miss your birthday party; Ino would have our guts for garters," chuckled Kiba.

Sakura shook her head. "No, it's not that."

"Then what?" asked Kakashi. They were paired with a pair of Jounin teams as they travelled to a missing nin gang's new base of operations. Another pair of ANBU teams was already on location, scouting and gathering intelligence. Itachi had been sent along ahead of them to lead the reconnaissance.

She shook her head and gave him a false smile that creased her eyes shut, hiding them from him. "Nothing."

"Did you forget something?" He glanced down at the ground, where several of his ninken followed at his heels. "I can ask one to nip back for it."

"Never mind, just a feeling."

Kakashi nodded, before glancing down at Pakkun. The little pug gave a small snuff before trotting ahead of Kakashi and falling into step beside Sakura. He watched her shoulders calm down as she and the pug exchanged a few civilities and her posture relaxed. That night, Pakkun stayed beside her during her watch and also as she slept.

"I know what you're doing," she said softly to Kakashi as they packed up their bedrolls the next morning.

"Hm?"

She grinned up at him, then gave him a quick peck on the cheek, mask to mask. "Stop worrying, I'm fine."

"I didn't do anything."

"Mm-hmm. And Pakkun just accidentally, of his own initiative, cuddled up beside me to sleep."

"He must be quite comfortable with you."

Sakura laughed at his casual manner and reached up to ruffle his hair.

"It wasn't the first time," she admitted. She paused in her ruffling and withdrew her hand. "Sorry, force of habit."

"I don't mind," he said honestly, still bent over his pack. He turned to look at her and swallowed when he realized how close she was. Their gazes held as he stood up.

He now towered several inches over her. Her brow creased as she smiled at him.

"When did you get so tall?" She laughed at herself, shaking her head.

His gaze softened as he leaned forward a little, hands in his pockets.

"When I grew up." He met her gaze again. "I've always been right in front of you. All you need to do is look at me, and see me here."

Sakura's eyes widened as she paused at his words.

He watched her jaw moving behind her face mask. His heart speed up its pace as he waited for her reply.

"Moving out. Kakashi, take point with your ninken. Eyes open," called Sasuke.

Straightening, Kakashi nodded at Sakura, giving her an eye-crease smile. "Later."

"Later," she repeated back, watching him jog off, fresh pack firmly strapped to his muscled back. With a short whistle his ninken had assembled around his heels and he gave a subtle hand signal that sent them shooting for the outskirts of the group, into the brush.

"Is your baby all grown up?" teased Kiba, coming from behind Sakura.

Blushing, Sakura turned and gave him a look. Then shifted her weight as she strapped on her own well-worn pack.

"I… yeah, he did," she murmured to herself.

She couldn't help glancing at his strong, broad back as he moved further away from her. Now, he led their team forward. Something about this sight caught in her heart, a tiny, furious, wild tempest inside her that spun before it settled; something small but significant that she couldn't pin down.

He had grown up.

Her little Kakashi was an adult.

* * *

Ever attentive, Kakashi looked around the bar at their inn in Snow.

"Itachi's briefing the team leads upstairs to get them caught up," said Kiba, noting Kakashi's wandering eyes. "Sakura, Shika and Sasuke went up."

"Sasuke? He went straight back to his room," said Shikamaru from behind Kiba, joining them. He pulled out a chair and turned it around, straddling it and reaching for the dinner rolls in the middle of the table.

"The meeting's over?" asked Kakashi, while Shika nodded.

"Oh, did he have any supper?" asked Hinata. "Did Sakura?"

A moment ticked by after Shikamaru gave a noncommittal grunt.

Kakashi shrugged.

"I'll go ask," he said. He collected the basket of rolls from Kiba's table, swiping them from right under Kiba's outstretched hand, and set off.

* * *

Shikamaru left the room, Sasuke following him. Behind them, Sasuke heard Sakura make a small, querying noise in the back of her throat. When he glanced back he saw Itachi touching Sakura's elbow. He took in the way his brother leaned into Sakura's personal space, crowding her closer to the wall, one of his feet silently slipping between hers.

Sakura's meaningful stare into Sasuke's soul told him all he needed to know.

Turning back around, he took a step back into the room, lightly touching his temple.

"Sasuke, your eyes. Do you have a headache?" Sakura burst out before swallowing.

Sasuke looked between her pleading eyes and his brother's Stygian ones and knew he would not be a welcome third wheel. Sakura had been his teammate for years, however and perhaps if Sasuke could just intervene for a few minutes it would dissuade Itachi from...

But it was then that Itachi's Sharingan flickered and his grip on Sakura's door tightened, his arm blocking Sakura from Sasuke's view. Before Sasuke's eyes, Itachi's expression tightened and his gaze shifted, becoming deceptively aloof. But Sasuke recognized well his brother's predatory awareness.

Guilt and shame riddled him like a barrage of kunai, but Sasuke knew he would not win this round. Not with Sakura in such close quarters.

"I'm going to rest for a bit before I join them," he replied evenly. "I'll stop by later if it hasn't gone away."

"Rest well," said Itachi, preventing Sakura from speaking further.

Sasuke understood the dismissal for what it was. With a silent nod to his teammate he left, noticing it was his brother blocking her in and who closed the door behind him, not Sakura.

An ugly feeling settled low in his stomach as Sasuke turned his back on his friend.

Swallowing his water in his room at the inn a short time later, Sasuke was dutifully ignoring the rhythmic banging on the wall opposite his own bed when a new chakra signature arrived outside his door. The noise from his neighbour's room continued unabated. It was Sakura's room.

To Sasuke's knowledge—and senses—Itachi had not left it yet.

Beyond a shadow of a doubt, Sasuke did not want to interrupt what was happening behind Sakura's closed door.

However, Sasuke sensed the newcomer's approach then pause in front of the room next to his. He heard the knocking on her door, accompanying the banging on the wall and desperately ignored it.

The rhythmic banging continued and escalated, however, much to Sasuke's discomfort… until it was followed by an even more uncomfortably meaningful set of wanton cries that made him want to roll his eyes and plug his ears with cotton.

Then he paused.

His mouth went dry.

Wait. He recognized that new chakra signature.

But, that was Sakura's room—which meant that outside her room had been—

Jumping to his feet, Sasuke leapt to his door and checked the corridor.

On the worn carpet floor lay a tipped-over bread basket, its pastries still rolling away.

Sasuke sighed, frowning.

The guilt needled at his insides more than ever.

* * *

Later that night, Sasuke waited in his brother's room, arms crossed.

"You could have knocked, I would have answered," said Itachi as he crossed the threshold, closing the door behind him.

Sasuke just looked at his brother.

"That's what you wanted him to do."

"Hn?"

"Don't take advantage of her to get to him."

Itachi stilled and blinked slowly at his brother.

"This is none of your concern."

"It is when it affects my teams. Tomorrow we're on point and I need to know I can trust him to watch not only my back, but yours."

"I have no need of his attention or support."

Sasuke pushed away from the wall.

"But she will."

With that he pushed past Itachi, barely restraining the urge to slam the door behind him.

* * *

He'd been afraid of this.

The next day, Sasuke sighed as Kakashi avoided him again by ducking into the trees to 'scout ahead'.

As if his ninken may have missed something.

With a glance at Kiba, Sasuke nodded that he was taking off. Kiba looked in Sakura's direction, then towards the forest where Kakashi had disappeared. He gave a nod before taking point.

"Hn," admonished the Uchiha when he caught up to Kakashi. Kakashi gave him a bored glare before ignoring him.

"You should get back to everyone," said Kakashi, leaping over another branch.

"You first."

Charcoal eye staring straight ahead, Kakashi ignored him.

Sasuke tried again.

"She doesn't know why you're avoiding her."

Kakashi was silent.

"We're all adults."

Kakashi's eyes narrowed, but still he leapt further, faster, longer.

In a moment of frustration, Sasuke poured on speed and darted in front of Kakashi, forcing him to a halt. Breathing hard, both men glared at each other.

"Are you mad at her?"

"No." Kakashi looked away.

"Are you disappointed in her?"

Kakashi looked away.

"It's not that simple."

Sasuke's brow arched.

"Explain."

When Kakashi grumbled low under his breath, and turned away, Sasuke nearly rolled his eyes.

"Speak up."

"I said, he didn't do it _for her_ , he did it _to me_!" Kakashi's dark eyes blazed at Sasuke as he whirled on him. "He used her and he did it to get at me."

Sasuke took a deep breath, letting it out slowly.

Kakashi's bluster wore out almost immediately as his shoulders slumped.

"Your brother's… not the man I thought he was."

With that admission Sasuke felt a moment of true kinship with Kakashi.

"Welcome to the Rare People Who Understand Itachi is a Mere Mortal club. Membership: Three."

Kakashi's brows rose as Sasuke's smirk held a rueful sadness to it. He looked at Kakashi in a 'whatcha gonna do'-way.

"He did. You're right." He folded his arms across his chest. "I will neither deny that nor defend him."

Kakashi watched Sasuke before he looked away. His hands were clenched in loose fists at his sides, flexing and relaxing at uneven intervals.

Sasuke's eyes narrowed. While he was leading his team he could risk no insubordination. Furthermore, he couldn't risk Kakashi getting distracted. Deciding on a bit of 'tough love', Sasuke stepped in front of Kakashi again.

"He disappointed you. He hurt you. He used Sakura. And? Sakura consented. What happened between them was none of our business. We have a mission. Now, what will you do about it? Avoid her? Ignore his orders? You're a better shinobi than that, Kakashi."

Kakashi scoffed at Sasuke and turned to leave. Sasuke grabbed his sleeve.

"Sakura taught you better."

Kakashi tugged his arm free.

"So did he."

* * *

There was a small confrontation as they reached their target base camp.

Unfortunately, it wasn't with enemy nin… exactly.

Kakashi's ears burned as he walked away from a chuckling Kiba and a sympathetic Hinata.

And a frustratingly aloof Uchiha Itachi.

"Kakashi," began Hinata as she gently approached him.

He turned away, the back of his neck flaming.

* * *

"—over there, tents over there, mess over there," pointed the ANBU when they arrived at the camp. "We have traps set out around the perimeter, along with some genjutsu. The genjutsu's a little subtle, but it's there. Nothing too scary," he chuckled. "But they assured us it would stop anyone in their tracks."

"Courtesy Uchiha-Taichou?" asked Sakura, surmising who had cast the genjutsu.

"Yes," said the ANBU. "However, as we've mentioned it and you know to keep an eye out for it, we doubt anyone will walk into it. This is a very seasoned team."

Noting the traps and making a note to copy some of the fun ones, Kakashi followed the rest of his team and went to set up his cot.

It was less than an hour later that Itachi collected him and several others.

"Perimeter sweep; learn the boundaries, familiarize yourselves with them and their traps," Itachi advised and dispatched them.

With a nod, Kakashi disappeared from sight, off to survey the northern corner.

* * *

_One genjutsu, two genjutsu, three genjutsu, four,_ sighed Kakashi. _Five genjutsu, six genjutsu, seven genjutsu more…_

_Fine, there hadn't been that many, but they were fairly obvious as he knew to look for them,_ he thought. This tour was disappointingly boring at this point.

He leapt from branch to branch before hearing a river nearby and deciding he could do with a quick splash over his arms and head after the long run. A quick scan of the area confirmed it was clear and he landed on soft feet on an outcropping of tree root, keeping close to the brush to maintain cover. He had just rinsed himself off when he heard breathing from behind him.

In an instant he'd flipped out his kunai and let it fly from his fingers, only to hear an embarrassed sigh.

"Sorry," said Sakura, knocking his kunai off course before collecting it and returning it to him. "I was waiting for you to finish so we could walk back together. Mind if I wash up quick, too?"

He shuffled a bit to the side, letting her through.

"Hey," she said, nudging his shoulder with hers and smiling at him. "Did I ever say thank you for keeping Genma off my back?"

"I didn't do anything," said Kakashi, sitting on his haunches as he dried out.

Sakura poked him in the shoulder, laughing. "Uh huh. And he just happened to suddenly become a _respectful_ lecher towards me."

She shook her head.

Kakashi's eye crinkled as he forced a smile behind his mask.

"Has he stepped out of line at all?"

"Easy on the killing intent," said Sakura, eyes widening. "And no, he's been fine lately."

A small blush warming his cheeks, Kakashi coughed and cooled himself off by dipping his hands in the water again. But as he leaned forward it occurred to him that he was exposing the back of his burning neck to Sakura, and he fought the urge to sink into the river bank.

"What's up?" she asked, softening her voice.

"Hm? Nothing."

She took his hand and pulled him around, surprising him with her directness.

"You can talk to me, Kakashi. No matter what," she said, viridian eyes wide and earnest.

He struggled to swallow, his lips working but no sound coming out.

"Kakashi?" she asked, leaning closer.

His thoughts scrambled, Kakashi shook his head.

—and suddenly felt a pinch in the side of his neck.

He saw Sakura's eyes widen as he reached for him and tugged a dart out. Then everything went dark.

* * *

"...ashi….Kakashi… come on back now," came Sakura's voice, cajoling him from the cocoon of darkness that enfolded him in its warmth and comfort. "Naptime's over."

"Hm?" he asked, shaking his head and rubbing at his eyes.

His skin was thicker and rough; his hand larger. His back was stiffer, and felt heavier, too. What kind of poison had they hit him with?

And yet, he felt safe, secure.

Confused, Kakashi opened his eyes and nearly fell off the… warm, soft… couch?

"Hey sleepyhead," he heard her murmur, and then felt Sakura's fingers sweeping his bangs off his face before curling behind his ear. "I need to go feed her. Could I get up, please?" she asked, teasing.

From the angle she hung over him, Kakashi realized in a flash that he was resting his head in her lap.

And then he heard the restless stirrings of an infant from very close by.

His heart stopped in his chest as he shot up and looked around.

His family home, but not his family home. The same rooms, but now brighter… more colourful. The children's toys and wood training kunai lying about; the yellow starred baby sock hanging on the side of the couch. The scent of baby powder, zinc oxide and mother's milk.

He turned to stare at Sakura, as his heart began pounding in his chest once more, too hard, strong and steady to be normal. He recognized a throw from Sakura's apartment over the back of the couch; her favourite mug on the coffee table in front of them. A stack of freshly dried laundry, ready to be folded, was piled high by the end of the hallway in a basket he recognized from her old apartment.

His ninken were sprawled across each other, snoring in a patch of late afternoon sunlight that streamed through the picture window. A clock ticked in the background. Outside the leaves were changing from green to gold and orange, and he felt the wind blowing a gentle breeze to ruffle his longer, wild hair.

From her seat on the couch Sakura smiled at him, her eyes faintly lined and expression soft.

"Did I wake you from a good dream? You were down for the count." She arched her back and stretched before standing and it was then he noticed how much fuller her chest looked, how her hips were wider, how much she glowed. "I'll be right back. Let me grab your voracious daughter and we'll settle in for her afternoon feed together, okay? Oh, could you grab supper from the freezer? The boys will be back from the Academy soon and you know how they're always famished after racing each other home."

She was already up and moving towards the baby— _our daughter_ , his mind prodded him—when he nodded, on autopilot, and walked to the kitchen. _Older_ , he realized. He wasn't just tired, he felt… _older_.

But when Sakura returned, their little snow-haired Suzumu nestled in her arms and rooting around Sakura's chest with hungry grumbles, his heart melted and all his doubts settled.

"Did you find it okay?" Sakura asked, unbuttoning her shirt and scooping Suzu into position with practiced ease. "Easy, you little goober," she said, nuzzling her daughter as she latched on. "You'd think we'd been depriving you," she murmured, grinning. "Greedy little one. There you go."

Still on autopilot, Kakashi had opened the fridge and walked over with a pitcher of water, already refilling her mug. Sakura smiled up at him.

"Thanks," she said, and accepted the cup from him.

He nodded. "The casserole for supper?"

"Yep. Oh, could you put some extra vegetables on?"

He settled a kiss on her forehead and nuzzled his wife.

"If I cook extra, do I get a belly rub later?" he murmured in a husky voice, rubbing his cheek against hers.

Sakura laughed, cupping the side of his scruffy face. "You're relentless. We'll end up with four soon."

"Mmmm-hmmm," he murmured, unrepentant.

"We'll see about you possibly receiving 'flowers' later," Sakura said, and delighted Kakashi when she blushed.

With a quick jutsu he corralled several clones to prepare the veg and went to snuggle his head back into Sakura's lap, supporting her elbow as she nursed their precious Suzumu.

With a happy sigh, Kakashi closed his eyes and let himself drift in happiness. Everything. He had everything he'd ever wished for.

Life was perfect.

* * *

"... ashi… Kakashi?... Come back to me, come on…"

"Any sign yet?"

"... no, not yet… better get Taichou…"

General rumbling and dissenting noise. Kakashi ignored them, happily cradled in Sakura's warm lap. In fact, whoever they were they could go take a long walk off a short pier. He was busy.

With a murmured, "Leave me 'n m'wife alone,", he turned onto his side and buried his face in Sakura's stomach.

"Need more babies," he mumbled around a yawn, reaching his arms around Sakura and pulling her closer. "Suzumu needs to be a big sister."

There was a strange pause when Sakura's voice was somewhat strangled.

"Kakashi?"

"Hmmmm?" he hummed happily, snuggling closer.

Her swallow was audible.

"Wh-who are you married to?"

"Hn. You. Who else? Are the boys back?" He pressed his nose into her firm tummy and lipped at her shirt. "We can get started on number four."

He heard her swallow.

"Uh…"

The sounds of the forest surrounding them slowly cut through Kakashi's dreamstate and he felt the different breezes rushing over him, strong enough to ruffle his shirt and vest, not just his hair. Birds chirping and cawing around them, leaves rustling, the river coursing down past the bank he'd been crouched beside, washing up… before the dart caught him. His hip was dug into the rough, dirty forest floor.

It hadn't been a dart, he realized.

_Genjutsu_.

Kakashi's eyes shot open and up; her eyes wide, her face pale, Sakura peered down at him while wearing her Jounin uniform.

"Kakashi? Can you hear me?" she asked, voice thready.

In mounting horror he could only stare as she hunched over him, teasing his hair from his face. She cradled his head in her lap, one hand glowing and monitoring his vital signs. The sun was dipping low and cast shadows around them. He had been out for quite some time, it seemed.

"Kakashi, who… where are you?" she asked, her face concerned.

He couldn't speak. He couldn't.

Sakura wet her lips, her eyes turning down in the corners. She glanced up at Hinata beside her, shaking her head. "Better get Taichou. He's not coming out."

Hinata nodded and hurried away.

Taichou?— _Itachi_.

His embarrassment and anger flared in unison.

Itachi had sent him to this quadrant specifically, Kakashi remembered.

The entire mission, Itachi had been goading him, Kakashi realized next. And Itachi had cast such a subtle genjutsu that even when Kakashi had been looking for it he'd stepped into the middle of it. The Uchiha knew him better than he realized, Kakashi thought, furious with himself.

And that was how Itachi had known exactly how to capture him; by giving him exactly what he wanted most. By showing him an illusion that he could never hope to achieve; equality with Sakura.

He would never be the same age as her.

He would never see her cup in his home.

He would never hold their daughter together.

This illusion was devastating in its accuracy; and it showed him exactly what the Uchiha could do to him.

Because Kakashi understood now that what he'd seen was exactly what he and Itachi had in common: the desire for peace, safety, and Sakura's loving arms to come home to.

And then Itachi had taken it away… the same way he would take Sakura away from him.

"Report, Haruno," commanded Itachi, entering the small clearing where Kakashi now sat with a whirling mind, surrounded by his colleagues.

"He fell under the genjutsu, Taichou," said Sakura, the lines around her face tight with concern.

"Status?"

"Kakashi—"

_He hates me._

_Itachi absolutely hates me_ , Kakashi realized, stunned.

Sakura continued a brief report to Itachi, but Kakashi could focus on nothing but the unfortunate truth. He may not have liked Itachi for some time, but it was sobering to find out his mentor abhorred him to such an extent as to publicly humiliate him. While on a mission, at that. How… how frustrated did one have to be to go so far as to do so? Why? Why now?

Kakashi looked away. He wasn't sure what to think.

"Nothing to worry about," he said, rising to his feet and giving his feet a shake. "I fell asleep."

"Helluva dream," snickered Kiba from nearby. "Only you would dream about being married like it's a good thing, Hatake," laughed Kiba. Beside him, Hinata glared at her teammate before turning wide eyes on Kakashi.

"Kakashi-kun, do you feel all right? You weren't easy to wake up," she said softly. Her violet eyes were focused on him with compassion and pity.

He turned away from her, nodding vaguely.

"All good!" he said, rubbing the back of his head. It kept his hands from reaching for his kunai and going for Itachi's throat.

Beside Kakashi, Sakura also nodded and got to her feet. She lifted a glowing hand to his head.

"Your vitals were clean, but you didn't want to give up whatever you… saw," she said, hesitation in her words. _Felt_ , she implied.

The wind picked up further, blowing leaves and bits of debris around them. Kakashi relished its sobering feel. His fists clenching for a second at his side, he swallowed and turned to give her an eye-crease smile.

"All fine. I had a good nap. Did I miss any excitement?"

Itachi looked between Kakashi and Sakura.

"Haruno, is he cleared to return to duty or does he need to return to Konoha?"

_Don't let him do this to you!_ Kakashi caught himself before he snarled at Itachi. He was not unfit for duty; there was no way Itachi was getting rid of him this way. He felt a tingle of Sakura's chakra shoot through him and saw the warning look in her hard green eyes.

Her shoulders straightening, Sakura lowered her hand, no longer glowing, and shook her head subtly, eyeing him as she faced Itachi.

"He is neither delirious nor unstable. He is fine to return to duty, sir."

Kakashi hid his surprise by turning to face Itachi full-on; the Uchiha regarded him with cold, inky eyes.

"Advise me of any change in his condition at once. We cannot risk the success of the team or mission."

"Yes, sir," said Sakura, giving a short bow.

"The rest of you, return to your posts," ordered Itachi, turning and returning to the camp.

As the crowds departed Kakashi felt tingling through his body. Sakura had touched his back and clenched her hand in his vest a moment, stalling him.

"Kakashi," she said, swallowing, but he tugged away from her.

"I was disoriented from the genjutsu," he said, cutting her off before she could begin. "It's nothing."

"It didn't sound like nothing," she said quietly as he stepped away.

"Forget it," he said, reaching down to collect the weapons she'd stripped off him earlier. "Thank you for your help," he added, more gruffly than he intended. He cursed himself a hundred times over. _Don't take it out on her; she did nothing wrong._

Her bleak voice was a lash across his back.

"Anytime," said Sakura, watching him go. "I can speak to the others if you—"

"Just stop it! You aren't my sensei anymore!" he snapped before he could help himself.

The silence between them chilled the air. The birds and animals scattered and left Kakashi with his fists shaking.

Humiliated, he stalked off so as not to dig his grave deeper.

Feeling like a heel of the most assholish kind, Kakashi refused to splash any more damn water on his face to cool his burning cheeks when he passed the riverbank. Instead he took to the trees to continue his perimeter check. There was work to be done.

And there was much to be considered.

* * *

Several days later, as the group returned to Konoha, he felt her approach and put on more speed again.

From behind him he heard a small huff before her chakra signature vanished from his senses. At first distracted by her sudden disappearance, he almost turned to look for her… until his entire ninken pack suddenly veered off wildly into the forest.

Then he heard them yipping with excitement and his brow furrowed.

Ah.

Sighing internally, he considered continuing on but thought better of it. It was just as well to get it out of the way now.

"You're a dirty cheater, Sakura," he said when he reached her. She was perched on a tree root with his pack around her, bellies up and begging for tummy rubs. Their favourite treats were scattered here and there—or, rather, their crumbs were.

"I don't suppose now would be a good time for me to apologize?"

Kakashi's ears burned at her words.

"You don't need to apologize for anything."

"I hadn't realized it would come across… the way it did."

He nodded. "Don't worry about it."

She sighed and her shoulders fell, her hand absently reaching down to pet one of his traitorous ninken.

"I should have… anyway. I cleared it up with everyone for you."

Could she leave no facet of his masculinity intact? Kakashi wanted to bury himself under the earth and never surface again.

"I'm not sure what happened when you tripped into that genjutsu, but Itachi isn't the type to gossip. Sorry, I should have warned you it was set up closer to the camp. I'm...so sorry. I just couldn't believe you didn't realize it was there."

Kakashi nodded.

"It wasn't bad. Just a little disorienting." Being an ANBU and caught in such an elementary jutsu? It was mortifying. And in front of everyone on both teams for the mission?

How Itachi had lured him to it, he was still trying to figure it out. But he knew he had.

Kakashi wasn't ready to rule out witchcraft when it came to Itachi.

"Are you okay?"

He gave her a false smile through his mask as she searched his eyes.

"All good!"

When his eye uncreased he saw her confident compassion sliding, replaced with concern.

"I'll speak to him," she said, standing to go.

He wanted to swear. "No, it's—"

She waved him off.

"I'm not sure what happened between you two, but he's been acting strange for ages around you. At first I thought he was hitting on you, but—"

Kakashi paled and felt the world tilt the wrong way for a second. He casually stretched his arm to grab the tree, trying to regain his balance.

"—but then I didn't think you really went for men. But I could be wrong, and if so, I'm really sorry. And also, I think your friend Iruka has been eyeing you up, but you didn't hear that from me—"

"Wait, you… there's a lot that happened in that breath." He speared his silver hair with his fingers and barely withheld the urge to yank on it. Instead he took a break and sat down on the root Sakura had vacated. "Hold on," he said, lifting a hand.

Sakura glanced over her shoulder before she straightened, her viridian eyes wide.

"Are you alright?" Her palms were already glowing as she turned back to him.

Oh, how he was tempted. Tempted to lean into her touch. Tempted to release the tree and instead…

Instead he was left fighting to not embarrass himself further.

He closed his eyes as she neared, felt the flare of her chakra as she brought her hands to touch him, one at his temple, spearing his hair with her dexterous, capable fingers, the other over his heart.

With supreme force of will he pulled away, shaking his head. Not like this. Not under false pretenses.

Her hand dropped from his chest.

"You didn't know Itachi was bisexual?" Sakura's healing chakra faded. Her fingers stroked his temple absently.

"No."

"You didn't know Iruka had a thing for you?"

Suspected, but ignored. Well, maybe exploited. A little.

"He's not my type."

He heard her huff of laughter under her breath.

"You have a way with men, Kakashi."

He sighed. Her fingers felt like magic against his tense scalp. Unconsciously he leaned into her.

"Don't remind me."

"Still no luck finding the woman of your dreams?"

"She's out there," he said.

"Lucky girl."

He could hear her smiling, yet something in her voice sounded almost… wistful.

He opened his eyes to find her staring into his; her hand had slowed to light caress in his stubborn hair.

Their gaze held.

His jaw tensed when he saw Sakura swallow, the parting of her lips.

Then, as he was lifting his hand, he heard the low, warning growl from his pack.

Without warning he threw himself forward, grabbing Sakura and propelling her to the side, covering her with his larger body.

However, even before he heard the spray of senbon pepper the ground and tree where they'd been a split-second earlier, he felt his own back hit the ground and skid across the forest floor.

An eerily familiar sense of wrongness filled him as he felt Sakura, now so much smaller compared to him, compared to so many years ago, shuddering as her body shielded him from a barrage of kunai after she had flipped them in mid-air.

For a second he couldn't breathe; all he could see were her green, green eyes, wide and fierce and… relieved.

"You're okay?" She gasped, one of her hands glowing and running some kind of diagnostic when her back must look like a pin-cushion.

_Again_.

For him.

_Again._

Unthinking, Kakashi wrapped his arms around Sakura and leapt blindly, aiming for whatever branch or stone would lend them the most cover.

He scanned the canopy as the branches blurred past.

"I'm fine. Heal yourself."

"They could be poisonous—"

"Which is why you should heal yourself."

He uncovered his Sharingan and swept the forest, quickly locating the four-man squad who'd stalked them. With a flurry of furiously calm hand signals he'd summoned his pack and sent them out with their orders, with two remaining at Sakura's side.

"Protect her."

Her eyes narrowed at him; he didn't fail to notice the haze that dimmed her focus.

"I don't need—"

"Bite her if you need to."

"Yes, boss."

Sakura glared at the dog and would have pouted, had the situation been less serious. Meanwhile, Kakashi had already caught two of the enemy in a genjutsu and had flashed away to start on the others…

It didn't take long. He didn't bother keeping any of it non-lethal or merciful.

_Again_. It echoed through his memory, the scenes of his childhood, his all encompassing fear from that old messenger mission, surfacing and clawing him raw inside.

_No. Not again._

His Sharingan whirled and the pain stabbed through his head. He grabbed the next nin by the scruff of her neck. He threw her against a pile of boulders, hard enough to snap the woman's spine. She cried out; he didn't stop. Driving his hand through her chest, he channelled lightning through her as she screamed. The scent of charred skin rose to his nose and he ignored it, ignored her shaking and writhing and begging.

What a worthless kunoichi.

When she flopped, limp, he turned to the last nin whose hands now shook with his second rate kunai. He took a step back when Kakashi stood an inch taller and straightened his shoulders, focusing on him with deadly fury.

Never _again._

Behind them the two nin caught in the genjutsu had begun screaming screaming screaming and _didn't stop_. After all, he was Uchiha Itachi's student in more than kendo. This would be the only time these nin would be taught this lesson.

When the last enemy dropped dead at his feet, his throat slit, Kakashi rushed back to Sakura only to find her staring at him, mouth a little open, and a tear sliding down her cheek.

His Sharingan spun wildly, capturing the image of her kneeling and bloody, her anguish raw.

The screaming behind them croaked to a gasping, gurgling end as the nin committed suicide to escape his ruthless genjutsu torture.

"... what have I done?" He heard Sakura whisper.

Kakashi looked around. He'd eliminated the threat. He'd protected her. His ninken were providing sentry support while another had gone to fetch Sasuke for back-up. They were safe. She had had plenty of opportunity to heal herself.

What had he done wrong?

Why was she looking at him like that?

"Oh kami, what did I do?" More tears ran down her face as she struggled to her feet and stepped unsteadily towards him… and hesitated.

For the first time she didn't raise her arms to welcome him, to heal him.

Her lips quivered and she pressed them together.

Kakashi's brow knit, and he took a step closer to her. He paused when Sakura swallowed and hesitated, as if she was about to take a step back.

Her eyes were on his hands; his bloody, murderous hands.

His mouth felt like cotton.

"It's not my blood."

It was the first thing that came to mind.

It was the wrong thing to say.

"I know," was all Sakura replied. She lacked any and all emotion.

She glanced around the wreckage of their small forest clearing before stumbling back in the direction the rest of their team had gone in. Someone would be looking for them soon; this had taken too long to be a short heart-to-heart to clear the air. Because it hadn't cleared the air at all; it had only brought something meaningful to the fore. Something that he saw now that Sakura had been refusing to acknowledge for a long, long time. Something he'd just brought to light in front of her.

Something in all its brutal, uncompromising, remorseless glory.

She reached up and inched her scarf a bit higher, snugger, around her throat and face; looking away from him. Hiding from him.

"We should go."

He nodded, swallowing. He couldn't seem to clear his throat.

With great effort he let his shoulders drop from their adrenaline rush, his fists unclench. He reached up and recovered his Sharingan, ignoring the pain that resonated inside his skull, the overly sharp images that seemed to pass in slow-motion before his eyes, the dampness on his cheek. He knew what they meant. He knew what she'd seen.

Wiping the crimson from his cheek, he stifled his wince as it brushed too close to his aching eye.

He knew what he would see, the next time he looked in a mirror.

He knew what Sakura had seen in him that day.

He had a gut feeling he knew what she'd felt, too.

It was a quiet trip back to Konoha.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Thank you to aijoinu and sleetfallrain for their beta help and feedback on this chapter! I am so very grateful to you!
> 
> AN: Coughcough. So, I hear you like angst. Coughcough. Author backs away slowly...


	9. Age 18: ANBU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kakashi makes an important connection.

**Chapter 9 - ANBU - Age 18**

"Where's…" Ino looked around the bustling restaurant, hand on her hip. "Funny. Usually when it comes to you, Kakashi's actually close to being on time."

"Hmm?" Naruto looked up from where he sat, Sakura on his lap. "Me?"

Ino's brow twitched.

"Sakura." She glanced at her friend. "I invited him. Where is he? I thought your mission finished. Was he sent out again?"

Sakura shrugged.

Naruto glanced up at her, pouting.

"Did you two have a fight?" He tapped her arm.

"No. He's probably busy."

Ino and Naruto looked at each other. Then looked at Sakura.

Naruto's arms tightened around Sakura's waist, while Ino sidled closer and leaned into Sakura's face.

"Spill."

Sakura sighed.

"He has his own friends."

"Yeah, they're here, too."

"Who knows." Sakura drank a long, long swallow of her martini through her straw, under her scarf. The skinny strap of her dress slipped down her shoulder and she shuffled it back into place, listing a bit to the side. Naruto righted her and met Ino's eyes again. His mouth was pursed, his azure eyes concerned.

Ino tossed her hair over her shoulder.

"Do I need to go ask Sasuke? Or… Itachi?"

Sakura's lips pressed together as she stiffened in Naruto's lap. Ino's sculpted brows arched knowingly.

"Oh, look who just arrived—"

Sakura straightened and tried to peek around her friend.

"Ka… ah. Hm." Her shoulders drooped.

Sasuke nodded to Naruto and Ino as he approached, his brother just behind him.

"Happy birthday, Sakura." He set down a flask of warm saké in front of her. Picking up on the strange vibe, he glanced at the trio again. "What happened?"

"Nothing," said Sakura, sipping her drink again.

"She's sulking," sang Ino.

Naruto gave him a meaningful look, and Sasuke eyed Sakura.

"I repeat, what happened."

"Sakura?" asked Itachi, his expression softening around his eyes.

"It's nothing. Really."

"Do either of you know where a certain silver-haired shinobi might be found—?"

"Ino!" Sakura tried to leap from Naruto's lap but he held firm as she struggled.

Sasuke glanced around the restaurant.

"He isn't here?"

Itachi looked at Sakura.

"He has reached a new low in disrespectful behaviour."

Sakura swallowed and glared at the wall, away from the Uchihas.

"That's rich," she muttered under her breath.

Sasuke's head whipped around, eyes wide as he stared at Sakura, then at his brother. Ino and Naruto blinked. Sasuke looked at the drink in Sakura's hand, then at Ino, his expression tense. She shook her head at him, subtly.

"Oooookay…" Naruto stood, depositing Sakura, somewhat calmed if deceptively cold, down on the seat. "How about I go take a look around and get us some food. Anyone else hungry?" He looked at Sasuke and Ino, who rolled her eyes and followed him, one manicured hand on her hip, the other holding her own drink.

Sasuke gave his brother a warning look before he, too, joined Naruto.

It was uncomfortably awkward as Sakura ignored Itachi. He took a seat across from her at the table, folding his arms in front of him, watching her.

"You're letting an inconsiderate child ruin your birthday party?" His low voice was velvet smooth, soft.

She crossed her legs, looking away from him.

"For someone who is, to use your words, only a student… this pouting is melodramatic and childish."

The noise Sakura made in her throat was unimpressed.

Itachi narrowed his eyes.

"Something to add?" His voice lowered.

Sakura's brow arched, and she turned to glare at Itachi, a wry smirk twisting her lips.

"You call him a child, and inconsiderate?" She shook her head slowly. "Coming from you, after what you did? On the mission, in front of everyone?"

Itachi leaned back in his chair.

The silence between them stretched, turning ugly.

"When you are ready to discuss your issues like an adult—"

Sakura's grasp tightened on her glass and her eyes narrowed at Itachi.

"—you are welcome to find me. I have requested a short personal leave from duty. Clan responsibilities call." He sat a moment longer, holding her eyes, before he uncrossed his arms and stood, pushing in his chair. "I expect to see you soon. Happy birthday, Sakura."

Her lips were pressed so tightly together they formed a thin white line behind her scarf when he leaned down to nose it aside and kiss her cheek softly.

"Get out," she breathed shakily.

"As you wish," he murmured.

* * *

Lying back on the grassy knoll, staring up at the stars with his natural charcoal eye, Kakashi wondered if he was doing the right thing or the wrong thing. He had never missed Sakura's birthday before. In more than twelve years, he'd been to every celebration, even if he couldn't stay the entire night when he was young. Since he'd been fourteen he'd stayed until the very end. Even walked her home on at least two occasions.

But the way she'd looked at him two days ago, in the woods, when he'd stood there dripping with another's blood...

Disgust.

She hadn't looked him in the face since. She'd barely acknowledged him in the streets.

He couldn't bring himself to upset her so much on her special day.

Or ever.

He let out a low breath as Pakkun flopped down beside him with a grunt.

"There's still time."

Kakashi's spirits had wilted, though.

"No, there isn't."

"We already dropped off the gift."

Kakashi slapped a hand down over his eyes. He stifled his groan, but not very well.

"You enjoy taking the initiative when it comes to her," muttered Kakashi.

"Forget who taught us?"

Kakashi sighed.

_Too late now_ , he supposed.

* * *

_How?..._

Her tipsiness from the party dissipated as Sakura looked down at her nightstand.

_Who?..._

She closed her eyes, a sad smile dawning on her face. She recognized that handwriting.

Of course he had. Or, if not him, then his pack.

Swallowing over the lump in her throat, she read the note he'd left in that awful chicken-scratch of his. That handwriting that had only gotten worse in the twelve-plus years she'd known and taught him. She was sure it was a deliberate nuisance on his part.

It made her smile.

" _I know you think you're the doctor from the first_ ," she read aloud, looking at the first book he'd left on her nightstand. " _But would you ever consider yourself the artist from the second?_ "

A slimmer novel, more of an excerpt, from foreign mythology. She racked her brain for a second before the legend surfaced in her mind; a blush formed on her cheeks. What exactly did he mean by…

Did he…?

She returned to the letter.

" _You're not a monster. You never could be._

" _You could never make one, either._

" _Think higher of yourself than that; you made me. I know I think higher of you._

" _Happy birthday, Sakura._

" _With sincerest, fondest admiration,_

" _Your Kakashi._ "

She swallowed again, feeling the warmth on her cheeks.

"You..." She coughed, trying to clear her throat as behind her scarf her lips crumpled in a grimace, half smile and half tears. But for the first time in several days, her heart had lightened.

She flipped the paper over and wiped at her eyes, trying to read aloud the post script.

" _P.S.,_ " she murmured. " _Stop hiding your smile. I'll show you mine, if you'll show me yours."_

And beneath that his scrawled henohenomoheji.

Mentally cursing at his cheeky, ambiguous note, she shook her head and looked at the pair of books in her lap.

Mary Shelley's _Frankenstein_.

Ovid's _Pygmalion_.

Behind the comfort of her mask she bit her bottom lip. Her heart fluttered.

What was he trying to say?

* * *

It was, perhaps, Kakashi's most dangerous mission to date. Rarely had he behaved so recklessly, or with so little regard for his own personal safety. The potential rewards, though, would be more than worth it. They would be legendary.

Sasuke stared Kakashi down, expression impassive.

"Why did you spike my drink?" Sasuke asked, dark eyes more curious than angry.

Kakashi just had to get the plan up and off the ground.

"You look like you need to relax."

"What do you want, Kakashi?"

"Who said I want anything?"

"You don't drink, so the fact I can smell alcohol in tomato juice is a dead giveaway; we're in your home, a private setting where information can be extracted and shared without risk of others overhearing. And your ninken formed a surveillance perimeter around the property the moment I arrived, ostensibly to ward off interruptions."

Damn overly observant Uchihas.

Kakashi rubbed the back of his head, eyes creased closed. He leaned back against the kitchen counter.

"Haha, you caught me! I need your help and… this is kind of embarrassing."

Silence stretched between them.

Sasuke watched Kakashi, who tapped a finger on the counter where he braced himself. The Uchiha cocked his head to the side, waiting.

"Spit it out. It's about Sakura. What do you want to know?"

"Who said anything about Sakura?"

Sasuke smirked at Kakashi.

"The only time you're motivated to do anything is when it relates to Sakura," he said, leaning over the table. He lifted his glass. "Make it a double. Stop wasting time."

Kakashi dumped the laced drink and replaced it with saké.

"You've been teammates since you were Genin."

"Hn." Sasuke took a sniff, then a sip, nodding to Kakashi.

"When did she start wearing the mask?"

"Why do you want to know?"

"Curious."

"You should ask her."

"She's sensitive about it. She always evaded and redirected, when I asked before."

"And you think I'm an easier mark than she is."

Kakashi could hear the amusement in Sasuke's voice.

"No, I think you'll tell me because you know I'm not asking in order to gain leverage over her with it."

_I'm asking because we both know I care._

"Hn." Sasuke inhaled. "She was twelve." He blinked. "She was twelve when she last went without a mask."

Kakashi nodded. Beneath his seat he shifted his weight on his feet.

Sasuke ran a finger down the side of his glass.

"You want to know why."

Kakashi nodded.

Sasuke let out his breath audibly, then drank deeply.

"That isn't for me to tell," he admitted, his voice unusually gentle.

Kakashi stopped fidgeting.

"Partly because I wasn't there, so I don't know all the details. Also, it isn't my habit to talk about my teammates' private business. But… know that I do understand why you ask, and I respect that your question comes from a sense of dedication, not common curiosity, like most." He nodded at Kakashi. "She didn't tell you when you were young because of how it came about; not because she didn't want to tell you at all. If you ask her now…" He shook his head, picking up his empty glass. "This was terrible saké."

"Very true," nodded Kakashi.

Sasuke shook his head, stood to leave, his expression less severe… before he reached for the table, his brows furrowing. He fell back to his seat, looking up at Kakashi.

"You laced the saké," he realized aloud.

"Hm. I knew you wouldn't tell me on the first go," said Kakashi, smiling at Sasuke from behind his mask.

Sasuke closed his eyes. "Sakura always warned me," he said, more to himself than to Kakashi.

"Ready now?"

"Yes, but very unwilling," said Sasuke. His eyes bulged as his limbs went numb. "Truth serum?"

Kakashi smiled. "Sakura is a master with poisons and antidotes. This is a new one she told me about. It wears off after twelve hours. No antidote. It hasn't been tested on ANBU, either, to develop their resistance yet."

"Shit."

"You have no idea."

"This is an invasion of her privacy. She'll kill us both," said Sasuke, his hair falling into his eyes as he struggled to stay upright.

"Oh, I don't want to ask you about Sakura. Well, I do, but we'll save that for another time." Kakashi pulled out the chair across from Sasuke's and took up paper and a pen. He smiled his eye-crease smile and propped his chin up in his hand.

"Tell me all about Itachi, Sasuke, from your very first memory. Especially any embarrassing or humiliating events. Things that may have happened at home, for example, that he would never, ever, ever want anyone to find out about."

Sasuke paled as his mouth opened without his accord.

"When he was…" he began between choking fits and gasps.

Kakashi tapped his hand under the table and turned on the data recorder he'd swiped from the Intelligence supply room.

Just because Sakura had consented didn't mean Itachi hadn't taken advantage of her.

It was time for a very clear message to be sent.

* * *

Several days passed before the fallout began.

He sensed her before he saw her, as he lay atop the bakery roof, his book spread open across his face and protecting him from the sun.

"You are a hard man to track down, Kakashi," she sang. With kunoichi grace she took a seat beside him and nudged his elbow.

He waved once but remained otherwise immobile.

"How can I help you, Yamanaka-san?" He mumbled against the pages of the book.

"Ooh, you even put on manners for me? That's so considerate!"

Kakashi sighed.

"What are you looking for?"

"You, of course."

"No, not who. What. You deal in information."

Ino's smile twitched as she stretched her shoulders.

"You normally beat around the bush more."

He shrugged.

"Too hot."

"Why thank you!"

Ino laughed at him when he sighed.

"Oh come on, you walked right into that one. And it's still true, after all." She planted her hands behind her and leaned back, tilting her face up to the sun. "So, I thought you should know; there are rumblings among the Uchiha. Something about a tradition being bucked."

"Ah."

"Something to do with the Main House, since, obviously, they aren't getting any younger. Did you know, they've never had an unmarried heir more than twenty five years old? Someone is apparently in danger of losing his status."

"Huh."

"Mmm-hmmmm. And they are squabbling about—I mean, discussing—breaking the age-old custom of Main Clan housemembers being required to marry within the Clan. Or to marry from a clan at all."

Ino eyed Kakashi; unfortunately his book was still in the way, which thwarted the easiest tell, but he was too still to her eyes. He had stifled his reaction on purpose.

"So be it."

Her brow arched.

"Maybe you don't remember because you were so young… But a certain someone ran into a bit of trouble, years and years ago. No one ever got the full story and it blew over. Mostly. The thing is, though, there was a rumour a long, long time ago that he was married; not an arranged marriage, like the Clan elders wanted, but some kind of clan bonding jutsu that was misused. Maybe accidentally-on-purpose misused. Did you ever hear about that?"

"...no."

"Oh, it was quite scandalous at the time; but no one could really prove anything and it was kept quiet, within the Uchiha Clan elders' highest ranks… and the Hokage's office. Obviously the Hokage would need to know if the heir of the village's most prestigious clan had suddenly been taken off the market, right? That affects plenty of politics inside and outside the village." Ino rolled her head and neck, back and forth. "Alas, rumours died down with no evidence of a paper marriage contract, or a baby."

"Baby?"

Oh, he was barely breathing; Ino knew she'd caught his attention with that one.

"Mmm-hmm. It was an old school jutsu. They're illegal now, mostly, but," Ino's hands made a gesture in the air. "When one is Uchiha I guess the law skips over things like that. For certain people."

"And you know all this because?..."

"A girl hears things."

"And you just had to share with me because?..."

"Oh, a little bird told me you may have had a tête-à-tête with a certain someone who may have had some interesting tidbits to share about a certain Clan heir."

Kakashi reached up and tugged his book down until his charcoal eye was visible.

"And," Ino continued as she took her time inspecting her nails, "As amazing as that Clan heir is as a shinobi, I don't want to think about what that Clan's council will try to do to my best friend who didn't deserve… Well. Which is where you come in." Ino grinned at him hungrily. "Because you don't want her in there, either."

"And you think that was enough intel to get me to spill the beans on him?"

Ino frowned at him, offended.

"That was quality gossip!"

He stared at her, nonplussed. She rolled her eyes and folded her arms across her chest.

"Oh fine. It was worth a shot. What do you want to know?"

The wind brought up the warm scent of fresh bread from beneath them; it was comforting. His attention was snagged by a blackbird that hunkered down in the branches of a nearby tree. He pulled the book away and tapped it against his covered mouth, deliberating.

After a few moments he glanced up at Ino again.

"You're giving in awfully easily."

She arched a brow at him.

"I'm invested."

"She can say no to him, if it is something she doesn't want."

Ino scoffed.

"Yeah, because no one ever made a woman, particularly the Hokage's apprentice, a political tool."

His grip on his book tightened.

"She has a choice."

"She needs more options." Ino prodded him with her tone. "And it isn't going to hurt to point out a few weak spots in the enemy."

"You don't think he'll trace this back to the source?"

"You aren't afraid of him, or his backlash."

"It's not me he would retaliate against." He then added, "Directly."

"Well, that will add more support to our campaign then, won't it?"

Kakashi looked back at Ino again, and sat up, choosing to lean against a bread-oven chimney.

"If I'm not around, you need to protect her," he said, his voice serious.

"Duh, that's why I'm here early."

She shook out her hair and pretended to ignore him.

Kakashi took a breath, then gave Ino an eye-creased smile.

"Perhaps I've heard a rumour or two about…"

* * *

Kakashi stilled as he heard his captain's tight voice. Then a second later he heard Sasuke groan and decided to melt into the nearest shadow to listen.

"How did Yamanaka find out?"

"How would I know?"

A meaty thud, and Kakashi's eyes narrowed.

"I didn't tell her! Maybe she got into your head during a psych eval. She's more intelligent than she lets on."

"I don't underestimate her; I overestimated a confidence."

"I didn't tell her. I have practice with Naruto; do you want him to come looking for me?"

"Hn."

Kakashi heard Sasuke pull himself up to his feet again and waited for the men to part ways before joining his almost-but-not-a-friend-because- _Uchiha_.

Ensuring that Itachi was well out of earshot, Kakashi approached Sasuke and handed him a fresh set of wraps from his hip pouch to wipe the blood from his mouth and the back of his head.

"You'd think he was the only one who was ever caught in a compromising position with oroike-no-jutsu before," Kakashi remarked.

Sasuke scowled at him and daubed at his lip.

"Well, most people probably don't consider creating multiple shadow clones while the original caster is enjoying a very enthusiastic oroike-no-jutsu for the simple goal of determining which is better, being him and fucking someone else, or being someone else and being fucked by him."

Kakashi was distinctly casual as he lifted his book.

"And that he took pictures to commemorate the event is just icing on the cake."

Sasuke looked at him.

"No he didn't."

Kakashi continued walking. "...And yet, they found their way into the weekly ANBU newsletter."

Sasuke stared at Kakashi in mounting horror.

* * *

Iruka had cocked his head, while Yamato continued spooning up his soup. Across from them at the table in the quaint restaurant, Kakashi considered Iruka's question.

How did he end up with Sakura as a sensei?

"You're the only student she ever took on, outside of the occasional apprentice or novice at the hospital. But she doesn't keep her apprentices long, there; just trains them in specific procedures."

"You didn't have a regular team as a genin, did you?" asked Yamato.

Kakashi shook his head.

"Why not?"

"I didn't play well with others," said Kakashi with his typical eye-crease smile.

Iruka's expression tightened from stress.

"He and the older students didn't relate well to one another. They thought he was a brat. He thought they were stupid."

"And that, too," admitted Kakashi with a humble nod in Iruka's direction.

"So you were always an elitist?" asked Yamato.

"Yes," Iruka answered for him.

"Oy," Kakashi mumbled, pouting over his meal.

Iruka side-glanced at him and grinned at Yamato, waving his hand.

"But once he met up with Sakura-sensei, he came around. He even started making friends."

"I had no team and I was on my last chance with the Academy. They were going to expel me," he said. "My dad spoke to the Hokage, and," he shrugged. "Then I was paired up with her. It worked out."

"And he's been the prettiest shinobi in Konoha ever since." The newcomer gave a nod to the assembled. "Not that he lets anyone see his scar-free hide."

"Says the jealous one," quipped Kakashi as Genma joined them at the table.

"Only the truth, only the truth." Genma settled his beer on the table. "Seriously, you don't have a single scratch on you after being paired with her. She'd never let it happen."

Kakashi stared at him, and Iruka cleared his throat uncomfortably and tapped the side of his face.

Immediately Genma backtracked. "Outside the obvious one."

"Smooth, Genma," muttered Iruka, glancing between him and Kakashi.

"She probably doesn't have a scratch on her, either, though. Those med-nins can do some crazy things."

"But if that's true… Do you know why she covers her face, Kakashi?" asked Yamato. "Genma has a bit of a point. Albeit a minor one."

"She said she has terrible teeth," he recited with a shrug.

"You've never seen her face?"

The men looked at him, their curiosity burning him like a brand.

"It's called respect," he said. "She's never seen mine, either."

"Serious?" asked Genma, leaning back with a low whistle. "She used to carry you home after training sessions, and you never tried to peek at each other?"

"What are you talking about?" Kakashi lifted his drink but did not imbibe. His half-lidded eyes remained low.

"You don't remember?"

He shook his head.

Genma grinned.

"I remember because of how jealous I was. You were really young, probably six or seven, a year younger than I was. I remember seeing Sakura carrying you home from the training fields, double sets of katana strapped to her and your pack hanging off her elbow. You were out like a light with your head on her shoulder."

Kakashi's brow furrowed.

"Now that you mention it, I saw that, too." Iruka nodded, looking at Kakashi. "You don't remember that?"

Kakashi shook his head.

"No."

"Well, you were young. She probably dropped you off with your dad at home."

"Must have," said Kakashi.

"You were jealous of a kid younger than you?" asked Iruka, turning the conversation back to Genma. Kakashi wore a thoughtful look.

"Sakura was hot!" Genma threw up his hands at Kakashi's sharp look. "And I couldn't believe a kid younger than me was a real shinobi, already a genin. Also, she was carrying him around like she was a white knight protecting her most precious little princeling. Like she would shield him with her life. It was cool."

"You have strange proclivities," said Yamato, deadpan.

"Kinks, my friend. They're called kinks. And they have proved very, very wonderful." Genma turned to Kakashi once more. "Anyway, as I was saying… what was I saying?"

"You're a blooming pervert with questionable sexual tendencies and a damaged cerebral cortex."

"I was asking if he'd seen her face, that's what it was!" His enthusiasm waned. "But you said no, shattering an ardent young man's dreams."

"Delusions," said Kakashi.

"Well, if I'm going to make a move, I'd like to know what I'm in for."

The table went silent.

"Uh," Iruka glanced at a too-calm Kakashi, to a stone-faced Yamato, to the death-baiting Genma. He struggled to find words to diffuse the situation.

"Uh…"

And failed.

"She's too good for you," said Kakashi.

"Doesn't mean she'll say no," leered Genma—before he doubled over and face-planted on the table, inert.

Kakashi took a lightning-fast sip from his glass while Iruka and Genma stared at him.

"Some people can't hold their drink," he remarked.

Iruka and Yamato decided that Kakashi was spending too much time with Sakura's poison collection.

* * *

Sakura's brows rose before her eyes narrowed on the two men sharing the treatment room she entered at the shinobi outpatient clinic.

Steeling herself for the usual absurdities, she inhaled a fortifying breath through her mask before planting her fist on her hip.

"What happened this time?"

"Ah! The rose of our ranks, the beauty of a thousand idols, our dearest blessing in—"

Across from Gai, Kakashi shrugged.

"It's just a scrape."

"Your palms are both shredded. Both of you. Which means all your palms. You practically painted the doorknob and entrance crimson. By the way, Maintenance and the orderlies hate both of you right now."

"It was not our intention to sully the finest institution, outside the Hokage's own office and admirable institution, in our competition. I swear it upon the seas that ebb and flow, upon the tides that rise and fall, upon the oceans that—"

"What were you doing?" Sakura sighed, washing her hands at the sink. She approached Gai and winced at the mangled hands he presented to her. Her shoulders fell. "They're full of grit."

She glanced up at Gai, her brows warring between frustration, irritation and concern before her shoulders set and she turned to grab the disinfectant from the cupboard.

"Were you running laps by walking on your hands again around the training grounds?"

"Of course not."

She frowned at Kakashi's casual tone.

"We were running on our hands and climbing the Hokage monument. Upside down."

She splashed a liberal amount of disinfectant on Gai's hands, ignoring his youthful shriek of pain and gratitude.

"You were what?"

Kakashi shrugged… but glanced at the bottle of disinfectant Sakura held in one hand, while she gripped Gai's wrists with the other.

She doused Gai's palms again, holding firm when he jerked back in reaction to the pain, howling louder.

"You were doing what, Kakashi? Because I know I didn't just hear you say you were climbing the Hokage Monument, upside down, on your hands."

"My faithful companion and rival speaks the truth!"

She narrowed her eyes at Kakashi, who swallowed.

* * *

As far as punishments went, it could have gone a lot worse, Kakashi admitted to himself.

On his freshly healed hands and knees in the meadow, his ninken spread out around him (some basking, some with their muzzles to the ground, searching), he asked, "This one?"

He held aloft a new specimen.

From her position a few feet away, Sakura leaned forward in her folding chair and lifted her sunglasses.

"Close. Same structure, but you're looking for the one with a three-pointed leaf, not four-pointed." She slid her sunglasses back down and leaned back once more. "Keep going."

He let out a soft breath and shook his bangs clear of his face, bending once more. Inching forward he passed in front of Sakura for the -enth time, crawling on his hands and knees.

"What is this one used for again?"

"Chakra burns."

"So it is more for the medics?"

"Exactly."

Kakashi nodded.

"The greenhouses don't stock it?"

Sakura sighed.

"Unfortunately, it's nearly impossible to grow in captivity." There was genuine regret in her voice. "I've tried a few times, but even the Yamanakas can't sustain it beyond two growing seasons. It doesn't regenerate beyond that indoors. And it's very hard to find it growing wild."

Kakashi continued searching, debating raising his hitai-ate to scan with his Sharingan.

"Do the medics need it often?"

"Not in slow times; when there's an escalation or an emergency, though, it makes the difference between us being able to continually help those coming in, or medics being burnt out, literally, and needing time off after a single shift." He heard her sigh again. "I can't risk that."

"When does it grow?"

"Luckily, year 'round here in Fire. It's just a matter of finding it."

"Sounds like it takes a while," he remarked, pawing through the overgrowth.

"An entire day. Or four. Just to find enough to brew a single batch of paste."

A woof to his left and Kakashi looked up to find Bull pawing at the ground and looking at him. Joining him, Kakashi leaned down and got a closer look.

"Three-pointed like this?" he asked, straightening and looking to Sakura; his brow furrowed as her eyes shot up to meet his, her cheeks pink and lips pressed together.

"Hm?"

"Three-pointed like this?" he repeated, pointing at the plant.

Swallowing, Sakura pushed herself up from her chair and joined him, kneeling at his side. A huge smile broke across her lips.

"That's it exactly! It's a small patch, but that's exactly the one we're looking for." She looked up at Kakashi, her eyes bright. "Good job! Thank you!"

Rubbing the back of his head, he smiled his eye-crease smile at her.

"Anytime. How much do you need?"

"As much as we can find," she said firmly, the brightness in her eyes dimming. Kakashi looked at her. Things had been peaceful recently…

Oh. She knew something he didn't. Hokage's apprentice.

In that case...

He nodded, and whistled once for his ninken to line up.

"This," he said pointing at the patch. "Fan out and target this plant. We need as much as you can find."

With a quick woof of understanding, the pack scattered and sent about their hunt.

Eyes shooting wide, Sakura looked at Kakashi.

"They can find it just like that?"

He nodded, giving her another eye-crease grin.

"Give them a few minutes, but it shouldn't take—"

He was interrupted by barking.

Sakura's brows rose.

"That is very useful."

Kakashi lifted one of her baskets.

"Be right back."

A few dozen meters away, he knelt in the meadow as Akino pawed at the ground. As he dug up the plant by its roots, Kakashi looked up at Akino's glasses as the pup sat at attention in front of him. He'd just cleaned Akino's spectacles and they were quite reflective… enough to confirm that yes, Sakura was staring at him again. At one particular part of him as he knelt down and extracted the next specimen from the earth.

He swallowed and willed himself not to blush. Or gloat. Or react in any way.

He let out a long, low breath and ducked his head again.

Another bark sounded from his right, then from farther afield. He'd be busy for a while. Plenty of time to not think about the fact that Sakura was… was…

He was so thankful for his mask as he bit his lip and took a deep breath before letting it out again.

Glanced at Akino's glasses.

She had turned to look away, her face as pink as her hair.

But her eyes were still tracking him.

And… and Kakashi felt his heart swell. He remembered the note he'd written her for her birthday, and wondered.

* * *

Sakura looked Kakashi over as they left the hospital's apothecary. They were both filthy after digging up so many baskets of the precious herb-flower for the chakra-burn paste, and sweaty, and a little sunburned, too, she noticed along Kakashi's visible cheekbones. His mask was also scuffed and dirty, and both their fingernails were black from digging in the soil.

"You thirsty?" she asked.

He shrugged.

"I could use some water."

She smiled at him and nudged him with her elbow.

"Come on, I have drinks at my place."

Soon enough they had reached her apartment, and Kakashi carefully took off his dirt-encrusted sandals. He hesitated before stepping further than her entryway.

"I'll just wait here."

Sakura roped her arm through his and yanked him forward.

"No, come on in. Forget about the dirt. I clean tomorrow anyway. I'll grab some towels for us to sit on."

After covering the sofa with blankets and towels, Kakashi gingerly sat down the cushions and accepted a glass of iced water from Sakura.

"Thank you."

She smiled at him, and he fought a blush.

"You aren't even looking at me. What did I do this time?"

"Hmm?" He glanced up, surprised.

"There we go. It's been so long since you looked me in the eye I was starting to get worried," teased Sakura.

He heard the gentle reproof and concern intermingled in her voice as she poured her own glass of ice water, leaving the pitcher on her coffee table. Another towel sat beneath it to catch the condensation.

"What's new with you?"

He shrugged.

"Nothing much."

She toed at his leg with her crossed foot.

"C'mon. You're young. What kinds of wild things have you been up to with Gai? Or Genma...actually…" Her brow furrowed. "Uh, about Genma…"

Kakashi held up a hand. "I've asked him to back off. He doesn't understand how women work."

She nodded.

"And he thinks his dick is a magical skeleton key."

Choking on his water, Kakashi nodded. Ugh. He needed to change his mask. He looked up from the carpet to find Sakura watching him, her eyes creased in a smile.

"Washroom's back there, if you need to freshen up."

He nodded and settled his glass on a coaster on the table.

"Be right back."

In the washroom he put on a fresh mask and stuffed the soiled and now wet one in his hip pouch. He took a moment to survey the variety of expensive creams and cosmetics that were arranged on Sakura's counters. The majority were only very faintly scented, and each one promised flawless skin tones, even colouring, blemish reduction, scar concealer… He sighed internally, twisting the cap back on the last one he'd opened in curiosity. He'd never noticed any of these scents on her, and the majority of them were full. He shook his head. Why keep them, or buy them, if not to use them?

Leaving the bathroom, he passed by her bookcases and noticed, as always, how her collection had grown again. As expected, she maintained a small library dedicated strictly to seals. It was as he meandered by it that he recognized a particular title… then two… then three. His eyes widened.

From the couch, Sakura watched him before she let out an audible sigh.

"Does…" He shook his head. He couldn't bring himself to ask.

Sakura gave him a knowing look.

"You recognize those?"

He nodded once, not looking at her.

"Hey," she said softly. He studied the carpet, his hands clenching and unclenching at his sides. "Kakashi," she said, more gently. She patted the couch beside her. "C'mere."

He shook his head.

"She knows about them, in general terms." She said, her voice calm. "I would never keep secrets from the Hokage. You know that."

"But those are S-class sealing jutsu scrolls… those ones in particular explain how to unseal a tailed beast," he ground out. Finally he looked up at her. "Why? Why would you have them?"

Behind her scarf, her lips were silent, still. She watched Kakashi a moment before fingering the edge of her scarf.

Kakashi's eyes widened.

"They explain more than just the tailed beasts. I… They were given to me. A gift."

"You just leave them out like this?"

She shrugged.

"Few people visit me for my library. Or at all."

He lifted an arm before letting it drop.

"You're the only person who's ever given them a second look," she admitted, giving him an eye-crease smile from behind her scarf. "I am not surprised you noticed. You were always very sharp. Even as a young child."

"As if Taichou wouldn't have noticed," said Kakashi flippantly; and it was then he saw her tense up.

Sakura's hand dug into her thigh, he saw.

"Regardless, they're not there for any evil, vile, nefarious purpose. Their intention was to help and assist, not offer malevolent returns."

His head was whirring in action, though, at her last reaction.

"He gave them to you," realized Kakashi aloud. "He stole them for you."

"He's the most decorated ANBU captain Konoha has ever had; the most loyal shinobi of his generation, Kakashi. You're talking nonsense—"

But she didn't deny it, he noted as his temperature rose while his heart drummed harder and harder inside his chest.

Uchiha Itachi, most loyal shinobi in Konoha, potential Hokage candidate, heir to the Uchiha clan… had been stealing forbidden jutsu.

For Sakura.

Yet, Sakura didn't specialize in sealing jutsu. She didn't work with seals regularly, though she was proficient with them in the field. It wasn't her specialization, which was medicine. From listening to her talk about her profession, he knew she didn't use them often in healing; when she did, she usually called in a sealing jutsu specialist to assist.

So why…

Her hand twitched by her scarf as she pulled it up higher on her pinked cheeks.

And it hit him.

* * *

He barged into Jiraiya's apartment, pushing the tall bear of a man back in his own hallway.

"Kakashi! How are you—what's… what's this about, son?"

Kakashi glared at him.

"You're a master with seals."

"A little late to the party with that one," said Jiraiya, scratching his prickly chin. "What? Do you need a hand with something?"

"You would have been called in to deal with a forbidden seal that had been used on a Konoha shinobi, correct?"

"Plenty of times," said Jiraiya. He leaned back against the wall and crossed his arms as Kakashi paced in his living room. Kakashi nodded.

"There was a scandal, a long time ago."

Jiraiya's brow arched.

"You'll have to be more specific than that."

"There was a scandal when the heir to one of the most prestigious clans in Konoha did something with a forbidden seal. You found out. You were called in."

Jiraiya was silent, his eyes following Kakashi as he tread a path in his worn carpets.

Kakashi continued.

"You were called in to help fix it, but you couldn't. But you found something about the situation so fascinating—and by fascinating, we both know it was tragic and supposedly 'romantic'—" Kakashi scoffed. "—that you wrote a book about it. A book that that clan heir went to the Hokage about to get her to ban you from ever publishing it."

For so large a man, Jiraiya could be quiet to an unsettling degree, Kakashi thought. But his thoughts were running away with him as more and more connections were made.

"The book, the one the Hokage made you promise to destroy. It was about Itachi, wasn't it." Yet there was no question in Kakashi's voice. "He used a forbidden sealing jutsu on Sakura."

Breathing hard, Kakashi turned wide eyes on Jiraiya.

"She's been wearing that mask since she was twelve," he said, suddenly remembering. A quiet horror seeped through his veins as the implications sank in.

And for the first time in his life, he saw Jiraiya, his hero—outside Sakura—, bow his head and nod sadly.

"It was on a mission," said Jiraiya, his voice gruff.

"To use a forbidden jutsu on a twelve year old?" exclaimed Kakashi.

"It was an S-class mission. Sakura was aware of that." Jiraiya's gaze remained on Kakashi. "It was war, Kakashi. It happened before you were born."

Kakashi shook his head before his feet slowed to a stop. His fists, clenched so tightly he felt the strain all the way through his forearms, finally released.

"He can't get it off, can he?"

Jiraiya shook his own head.

Kakashi's heart beat a hard tattoo; he had to ask.

"Is that why he is so overprotective of her?"

He glanced up at Jiraiya, who let out a low breath.

"Only he can answer that."

**TBC**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Huge thanks to aijoinu and sleetfallrain for their incredible help with this chapter! (All errors remain my own.)
> 
> AN: Apologies for the delay in posting this. I was running UchiSaku Week on tumblr through August, and I wanted to finish the edits and updates to those stories. If I have time, I'll aim for another update to "Soulmates" this month to make up for it!


	10. Age 18: ANBU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> NSFW

**Chapter 10 - NSFW**

_**15 Years Ago: Kakashi age 3:** _

_Carrying him home after they had been practising at a training ground, Kakashi had looked down and noticed the mark on his father's arm where his sleeve had ridden up. The cross-hatched diamond, their Clan symbol._

_"What's that?" he asked Sakumo._

" _Hm, that's the mark of our Clan, the Hatake. Someday you'll have one, too. Hopefully," said Sakumo, smiling gently at his son._

" _Is it a tattoo? Did it hurt?"_

_Sakumo grinned at him._

" _Not a bit. It felt pretty good," he said with a wink._

_Kakashi gave him a disapproving pout._

" _Pervert papa," he said, making Sakumo laugh._

_Shaking his head, Sakumo ruffled Kakashi's downy soft hair._

" _It only happens once. It will last forever. And when it happens, it twines your lives together in the most beautiful way possible." Sakumo looked down at his son then, his expression gentling. "The best way possible," he repeated. "It was like a second heartbeat to me. I've never regretted it for a second."_

" _Only once?" asked Kakashi, studying the symbol. "How come it only happens once?"_

" _Because you only have one heart in your chest, young man. You need it to breathe. If you give yours to someone, they need to give you theirs," said Sakumo, giving Kakashi a tiny poke in the chest. "And when you give your heart to them, it means you want to give them your name, share your life, and grow a family together."_

_Kakashi mulled this over._

" _So, for making babies? You get a seal like a license to make babies?"_

_Sakumo's shoulders relaxed as he gave Kakashi a cuddle disguised as a hitch up in his arms._

" _A contract," said Sakumo. "A promise. The most important promise you'll ever make. It means you'll never be apart. Because you'll be soulmates."_

" _But you and Mom aren't together anymore," said Kakashi, trying to understand his father's logic. He didn't remember his mother. She had passed away before he could make memories of her._

_And it was then Sakumo's smile turned sad. "I wasn't there for something important," he said, sounding older to Kakashi suddenly. He leaned forward and gave Kakashi a quick kiss on his forehead. "Lucky for me she left you to keep me company, huh?"_

" _Daaaad!" whined Kakashi, straightening his hair and making Sakumo laugh._

" _When you do it, Kakashi, mean it. Mean it, put your all into it and take the leap. Every minute is worth it," said Sakumo wisely. Then Sakumo flipped Kakashi into the air and caught him, resettling him on his back. "Hold on tight," he instructed his son. Kakashi had already koala-gripped his father, though, and was grinning when Sakumo took off running, their speed making his silky hair fluff in the air stream._

" _Up we go!" called Sakumo. Sakumo launched them onto Konoha's rooftops, grinning as wide as his son at hearing his son laughing when they leapt from one building to another._

* * *

**ANBU - Age 18**

The days after the confrontation between Jiraiya and Kakashi were fraught with tension.

Kakashi's distraction and mounting restlessness caught more than one superior's eye. In order to forestall a showdown between Kakashi and Itachi, the Hokage sent Kakashi on a ten day long mission to Suna. Kakashi used it to his advantage. The long distance running gave him plenty of time to think and plan.

On his way back from Suna, Kakashi returned to the Hokage by taking a meandering path through Konoha.

First stop, the bath houses.

"... haven't seen him for days…"

"... rumour has it the Hokage told him to take his perversions with him and stalk the women of another country for a while…"

"... don't know how he can be so revered as a sannin if he's such a louse…"

Then past the training grounds.

"...heard that the Hokage's apprentice was approached…"

"... the Uchiha are too set in their ways. It'll never happen…"

"... strange winds are blowing, though. If that knucklehead Naruto can get married, I don't think anyone can be a completely lost cause…"

Around the merchants' district.

"... large order of flowers, but not for another few weeks. Hopefully it'll be plenty of time…"

"... more visitors are coming, according to the farmers. They were told to beef up production, literally…"

"... but then I said, the soonest we could do it would be three months. They drive a hard bargain…"

"... but it seemed more like a contract. There should be more to it than that, shouldn't there?"

And to the cenotaph.

It was quiet.

After a brief period of meditation, Kakashi straightened and made his way to the Hokage tower as the sun dipped below the horizon. His mission report delivered, he made his way to his last destination.

* * *

He passed through the amphibian-stencilled doorway, silent as a wraith.

Not in the baskets with the loose scrolls.

Not under the futons (thank heavens he'd brought rubber gloves with him; he hadn't been able to approach the beds without them).

Not hiding behind any loose ceiling tiles.

Not hiding inside any other books.

Not under a loose floorboard.

Not inside the closet.

Not in the ice box.

Not under the cupboard.

Not in his desk.

Not in the drawers.

Not inside the fake-bottomed drawers.

Not inside the genjutsu-layered fake-bottomed drawers, either.

(Though he removed a few photos of Sakura he found. That lying bastard.)

Frustration leaking into his search, Kakashi huffed and shoved the last drawer more firmly into the desk than was necessary, making a slamming sound.

"Told you we'd find him here."

He spun on his heel to see Sasuke and Naruto watching him in the dark.

Sasuke arched a brow at him.

"Did you really think that Pervy Sage would leave his apartment unprotected when he left the village?" He jerked his thumb at Naruto. "The minute you passed the toad in the front hallway, the dobe knew what was up."

Swallowing, Kakashi stood and shrugged his shoulders.

"Worth a shot."

"Kakashi, if you wanted to see the proofs of his latest work in progress, just ask! I keep duplicates at my place! His publisher's orders after that one time Tsunade got in and—"

Sasuke rubbed at the bridge of his nose, holding up a hand to stem Naruto's verbal diarrhea.

"That's not what he's looking for," said the Uchiha.

Naruto looked between them.

The blond's over-enthusiasm drained away, his expression aging him as his brow deepened, the set of his mouth firming.

"Have you seen the banns?" Naruto asked, looking at Kakashi.

"The banns?"

Sasuke's expression was even when he nodded once.

"The wedding banns."

"Konoha hasn't published public wedding banns since before I was born," said Kakashi, folding his arms in front of him. He arched a brow at Naruto. "Since when were they brought back? They were archaic."

"They were brought back at the request of the Uchiha clan head."

Kakashi's shoulders stiffened.

"Tradition states that the clan heir must declare his intentions publicly for all to acknowledge when he chooses a potential mate to court." Sasuke's expression tightened. "He… made his choice, officially, while you were on your mission."

Kakashi's hands slid into his pockets.

"She won't accept."

"She may not have a choice," said Naruto, calm even as his brow furrowed.

"It has been expected for some time. Itachi would not have posted the banns without a great deal of confidence."

"Confidence has never been his weakness," said Kakashi.

The men were silent.

"How long do I have?"

"When the banns went up, the Hokage granted him a reprieve from duty for a fortnight. Sakura has to answer him within that time, or his courtship is considered rejected."

"When did they go up?"

"Ten days ago."

Kakashi spun around and glared at Naruto, who held up his hands.

"Messenger."

"I have four days to break the jutsu?"

Yet it came out as a statement.

Sasuke nodded.

"I can't directly interfere."

This time it was Naruto who glared at him.

"But, if you can find a way into the Uchiha archives, which are located beneath the temple in the middle of the clan compound, and if you nudge the third tatami on the left just the right way, you may find something to guide you in the right direction."

Sasuke ignored Naruto's stare, focusing on Kakashi.

Kakashi's eyes narrowed.

"Why are you helping me over your own brother?"

"Because she would accept him out of duty and honour instead of love."

"She loves him." He hated admitting it, but it was true. Sakura would never have let someone touch her if she didn't love them.

"She feels she owes him. Debt isn't love."

Kakashi shook his head. How could she feel she owed him when he was the one who cast the jutsu on her?

"I don't get it," he admitted.

"Worry less about that and more about the deadline," said Naruto. "One we can change; the other we can't."

How bad did a situation have to be for Naruto to be the voice of reason?

Pretty bad.

* * *

It was the middle of the night when Sakura heard the knock at her window and closed her eyes a moment, praying for strength.

"If that's another half-dead ANBU too chicken to check himself into the ER," she muttered under her breath, pulling on a light robe. With practiced ease she had wrapped her face in a light scarf. She padded to her window and pulled aside the curtains. Her eyebrows rose when she saw her visitor.

"Hold on," she said, dispelling her traps.

"Thanks." Kakashi slid in, closing the sash behind him and resetting her traps.

She pursed her lips behind the thin cotton of her scarf.

"I'm surprised you didn't cancel them yourself and let yourself in."

"That would have been rude and presumptuous. This is your bedroom."

"You could have entered from the kitchen or living room."

"I was not interested in being a test-case for some of your new poisons, either," he admitted, scratching the back of his head.

She grinned.

"I only use poisons I have the antidotes for. At home."

"That's a relief. And still a concept I'd rather not test, if it's all the same to you."

She laughed, heading back to her bed and flopping down.

"Are you injured?"

"No."

She yawned.

"What's on your mind?"

He stood there in the middle of her bedroom, watching her.

"I heard the news."

She looked down at her floor, her fingers twisting in her blankets. "

Ah."

"Are you going to accept?"

She shrugged and gave him a false smile.

"Will you give me your blessing?"

"No."

Her eyes widened.

He stepped closer.

"Tell me."

"What?"

"Tell me what happened. When you were twelve. What started all this. Itachi used a forbidden jutsu on you. You were a minor even by shinobi standards. Why?"

"Kakashi…"

"Don't brush me off," he said, a small growl in his voice. "I'm not a child anymore."

Rubbing her thighs with her beautiful, powerful hands, she murmured, "I know."

He took another step closer.

"Tell me," he said. "Tell me what would make Uchiha Itachi, prodigy, clan heir of the Uchiha, strategist and pacifist, ever dare use a forbidden jutsu on a child."

"Kunoichi."

"Who was still a child!" He insisted, his anger getting the better of him. "Why!"

"Shh!" She cut her hand at him in a slicing motion. He half expected senbon to shoot from her fingertips, but it was not to be, thankfully. "Just…" She growled in her throat. "Stop yelling."

But it was too late.

"Because I had to," said Itachi calmly from the door of Sakura's bedroom. His gaze flickered to Kakashi.

"Why are you here in her apartment while she's sleeping?" demanded Kakashi.

"During the courtship period, I am allowed to protect and defend my claim."

Behind his mask Kakashi's lips pulled back revealing his teeth.

"She's not a thing! She's a person!"

"I agree."

"Then why are you doing this? Why are you doing this to her! You son of a bitch! You don't even care!"

"Kakashi!"

Sakura leapt from her bed as Kakashi took a step towards Itachi.

To Kakashi's surprise, Itachi didn't frown in anger, straighten his shoulders, or even adjust his stance; rather his eyes became downcast and his voice lowered as he looked away.

"To make amends," said Itachi after a moment.

Sakura sighed, rubbing at her face.

"This is coming out all wrong." She turned to Itachi. "Could you please wait in the living room? I need to explain this to him."

For a second, Kakashi thought Itachi would protest but he merely nodded and left, closing the door behind him with a soft click.

Breathing hard, chest rising and falling harshly, Kakashi turned to Sakura. His insides trembled when she reached for him and drew him into her arms, embracing him. He hugged her close in return.

"How are you so calm?" he asked, willing his body to stand down. It wasn't happening. He tucked his head into the crook of her neck and shoulder, heart heaving. He tightened his grip around her, refusing to let her go now that she was in his arms. He breathed in her natural scent. "Why?"

"It was a long time ago," she said, resting her head against Kakashi's chest. "I forgave him years ago. He's tried so hard to make things right. I can't hold that against him, Kakashi."

"Why did you forgive him? How?"

Sakura let out a low breath and a sad chuckle.

His heart nearly stopped when she said, "Because it was the only way to save my life."

* * *

Her bed was warm and he held the cup of tea between his hands. Sakura had lit a lamp on her bedside table, and true to his word, Itachi remained outside the room to give them privacy.

"How could the Godaime's apprentice find herself in a situation where she couldn't save her own life?"

Kakashi traced with his charcoal eye the edges of the miraculous seal on her forehead.

"Hmm." Sakura clasped her own cup between her hands. "Well, in my defense, I was twelve. I knew much, but this," she looked upward between her brows. "Well, it wasn't always there, or this strong. I was still learning. I was a smart kid, though. And determined."

"Which was how you ended up on an S-class mission?"

She tilted her head side to side.

"Yes and no. It was intelligence-gathering, but we had to find a way in under their radar. They were too suspicious of adult shinobi joining. They didn't trust them. So…" She shrugged. "I knew what I was getting into. And I wasn't alone; I was just the only one who was successful. Well, until someone, another nation's spy, recognized me when I was preparing to leave."

Kakashi's brow furrowed, and Sakura blushed.

"I'd been in the Bingo Books since I was ten."

Behind his mask, Kakashi felt his mouth drop open before his lips firm into a single line.

"But you said you weren't alone," he said slowly.

She shook her head. "Itachi was there, under a henge, and so were one or two others outside the base. But he couldn't be with me 24/7. It would have been too suspicious. In order to stay in character, one night he had to run a mission for them and that happened to be the night one of their reconnaissance team leads, who had been stationed near Konoha, came back from a long term mission and…" she shrugged again. "It wasn't pretty."

Kakashi didn't imagine it would have been.

"Long story short, I was unconscious when Itachi found me. We were too far from the Village to make it back, and he's no med-nin. He was, however, the heir to the Uchiha who have kept a number of their more formal traditions and secrets close to the heart, whether they practice them in current times or not. So, he knew a jutsu or two, enough to get me conscious, and," her voice tightened as she cleared her throat. "He didn't have much time to explain. We were hiding in a cave under a heavy genjutsu with minimal supplies, on the run and under pursuit. We had very limited resources and time. He… provided me with the barest explanation and asked for my consent."

Kakashi swallowed to clear the block in his throat.

"What did he need your consent for?"

Sakura's until-then calm expression wavered as she looked away. "... part of the jutsu."

"Why did he need your consent?"

"If I couldn't give consent, the jutsu wouldn't work."

"That's kind of the opposite of how jutsu normally work."

Sakura snorted, breaking some of the tension they shared. "That's true, isn't it?"

She turned her teacup around in her hands several times before continuing, and the mood pitched downwards once more as she added, in a whisper.

"I said no."

Kakashi stiffened beside her.

"I said no, after he explained the jutsu. I didn't want him to… For his sake, I said no." She looked down at her cup. "I was young. I wasn't from a clan. Hokage's apprentice or not, I was a no-name kunoichi with some talent with chakra. I didn't have half the weighting he did. I tried to get him to save his own life, to leave me. He wouldn't, though. Said something about a promise. I found out later Shishou had made him promise to bring me back." She shook her head.

"So, he couldn't tell anyone that the Godaime herself had abused her authority, Not that he would, but it would eat at him, ya know? He would feel it, know it, and it would haunt him that he'd failed. I couldn't let Itachi come back a failure of a shinobi, disgraced. He couldn't let me die. I was barely conscious from my injuries and fading fast again. This was at the height of the war; we had few allies we could run to to give us safe harbour."

She set her cup down on her bedside table and rubbed at her face.

"It was heartbreaking seeing the most stoic, terrifying shinobi of our village shaking in self-hatred as he explained what he had to do, hating himself for not knowing what else to do and having to resort to it, and still getting down on his knees to humbly beg me to reconsider." She shrugged. "I couldn't stand seeing him like that. And there were no guarantees it would work. But it was all he could think of to do."

"What was the jutsu?"

"A seal." At his look, she tried to smile at him from behind her scarf but failed. "A soulmate-bond seal. The Uchiha sealing jutsu the clan heir of the Uchiha makes with his bride on the day of his ascension to clan head. It shares their life force."

"The soulmate-bond isn't real," said Kakashi, numbness spreading through his extremities like a diluted poison. He'd read the scrolls in the temple, that night, before rushing to Sakura.

"It's real enough to be functional." She shrugged. "I'm used to… it. It's been years."

"The jutsu. The seal," Kakashi clarified as the silence stretched, forcing himself to be calm. "Did it work?"

"To an extent. Yes, and no. I'm not Uchiha by blood, so some things didn't go as planned. But… because of there being conflicting feelings involved when he cast it, it produced the ownership, the possessive and protective aspects of the bond like sharing our life force, but not the emotional binding… at least from my side. I'm very fortunate Itachi has never pushed for more than what I could abide. For a young man, some of the side effects were… more challenging to..." She shook her head once. "We…" She let out a huff through her covered lips. "It has led to confusion.

"The reason Itachi and I are paired together on missions so often is because we can locate each other without speaking or being in contact. We can diagnose each other's physical condition through our bond. We can't die unless both of us are grievously injured at the same time because we share a lifeforce. We also share, and enhance, each other's strengths." She shrugged. "There are other benefits, too. For example, I can't have anyone else's child, which makes some aspects of kunoichi missions easier to deal with." She swallowed. "Well, also, I can't…" Her shoulders drooped. "Well, I also can't enjoy certain parts of my private life, either. Unless they're shared with him. Which we both tried to avoid, because the jutsu can be a bit compelling. From his side."

Kakashi was frozen in place.

"Its intention, its priority, is the proliferation of the Uchiha especially since love is highly treasured by their clan. I know it affects him differently than how it affects me, especially since I'm not a member of the clan by birth or bloodline. It's not a true 'soulmate' bond; it can't force you to feel an emotion you don't feel… if you aren't an Uchiha. And not all aspects of the bond have been fulfilled, which… plays havoc with certain parts of our friendship and relationship. But overall, I am grateful to him for saving my life and I feel guilty he has had to shoulder a burden of guilt for doing so. He also sacrificed a great deal of his own freedom in order to save me. He's the official head of the Uchiha clan, not the heir, though that isn't public knowledge." She gave Kakashi a look, and he knew to keep that last bit under wraps. "So, while among the clan Elders he's the leader, the one making all the decisions in clan meetings, in public he's the puppet to the Clan and hasn't been able to take his rightful place. It is stressful."

"All that privilege must be stifling," said Kakashi in a monotone.

Sakura's expression was unimpressed as she leaned back on her hands on the bed.

"It isn't pleasant at all, actually, to be the head of the Uchiha." She shook her head. "It isn't my business to speak about his personal life, but I understand that he is under a lot of stress. He's here often because he needs a break from it."

In the quiet room, Kakashi clasped his hands together, pressing his knuckles tight as he considered her words.

"You need a break, too."

"I've been used to it for so long I barely notice it anymore." She was lying.

The numbness had spread further, reaching the insides of his limbs.

"You've tried to break it?" His voice sounded numb, too.

"More than once. Me. Itachi. Jiraiya."

"How did that go?"

She looked at him and arched her brow. Then she shook her head once, turning to look at the floor. He could hear her swallow and his heart clenched. She shrugged one shoulder.

"Can't win every time."

He looked up at her then, at the soft hitch in her voice and his heart cracked at the sadness in her, for once flat, emerald eyes. The hopelessness. The despair.

"I tried for years, Kakashi. I kept trying. But because it wasn't cast the traditional way, it didn't seal the usual way, and we can't figure out what else we need to undo it. It's like a knot that we can touch, but can't see, and whose ends are tucked inside. Until we can pull one of the ends loose, we can't unravel it."

"You feel tied. Trapped." He watched her as her shoulders drooped and her hands flopped open in her lap, only her thumbs twining together.

It was quiet between them in her room, the lamplight shining between them. Outside the room, Itachi was silent as a ghost. Kakashi knew Sakura had requested privacy from him, and while Kakashi understood that while Itachi had always abided every request Sakura had made (something he in fact despised admitting and respecting about the Uchiha), he knew any shinobi worth his shuriken would be listening in.

"He does his best to make it not terrible for me. He's very creative. Compassionate. Sensitive. Demanding. Because he expects the best of not only himself, but of others. He pushes us to our limits because he knows we can meet them. But just because we can doesn't mean we want to, sometimes. And it would be nice to know that he did things of his own initiative rather than because of some faulty curse seal's compulsion." Her smile was forced, rueful. "While someone else can see the best in you all the time, it isn't easy to believe it yourself. Especially when you aren't sure if you can trust them." Her fingers twitched, lifted, before twitching again and falling to her lap. "Makes it hard to look in the mirror sometimes," she murmured.

The cogs in his head were whirling. "Why did you start wearing the mask?" Kakashi asked, softening his voice. "The injuries?"

She looked up at his charcoal eyes and held them, her shoulders rounding back.

"Sakura?"

"...The seal."

His eyes flicked down to the edge of the fabric concealing her face and neck before lifting to meet her eyes again.

He hunched forward in his seat and leaned closer.

"Did you have a choice?"

She shrugged.

"It won't matter. Soon everyone will see it."

His brow furrowed.

She sighed and looked back down at the floor. "Part of the ceremony will involve displaying the seal. Proof."

Kakashi circled his arms around her, pulling her close. Heart to heart he felt the tiny trembles she fought to control.

"Everyone will know," she breathed, ashamed, leaning into him. Borrowing his strength.

"Will know what?"

She huffed against his throat.

"That I wasn't strong enough. I'm, literally, branded with failure."

"You could never be a failure. Or a quitter. Or weak," he said, closing his eyes as he inhaled a calming breath laced with her scent. His arms shifted, snugging her closer. "To Konoha, you're the strongest kunoichi since our Hokage, Senju Tsunade; you're one of the bravest ninja to grace ANBU; you're one of the brightest, most resourceful strategists we've ever had."

She closed her eyes, burying her face in the crook of Kakashi's neck. The hair on the back of his neck rose to attention as he felt her soft, warm breath passing over his skin, even through the fabric of both their scarves.

"And to you?" she breathed, nearly soundless.

He swallowed; she would hear it, as close as she was to his voicebox.

Daring, he turned his head and ghosted his lips over the shell of her ear, blessing them, as he closed his eyes and mentally sent prayers of gratitude heavenward for their time together.

"To me," he began. Of their own accord, his hands smoothed up and down Sakura's back, reassuring and pressing her closer. "I see the kunoichi who taught me what it meant to be a shinobi of Konoha. I see the reason I am proud to wear a hitai-ate. I see the soldier who protected me, over and over again, with her own life and never asked for anything in return." He swallowed, breathed into her ear, pulled her into his lap so her legs were on either side of his. "I see the teacher who never gave up on me. I see the teacher who never let me give up on myself. I see the teacher who showed me the value of teamwork, and friendship, so I would never be alone."

He felt the wetness and warmth against his neck, soaking through his scarf. With delicate, calloused hands he stroked her hair before pulling her away from him so he could read her eyes.

His voice deepening, he swallowed his fear.

"I see the woman who is so afraid of repeating her mistakes, of hurting others, that she pushes others away. I see the woman who is scared of wanting something for herself, because she worries it will take something away from someone else. I see the woman, the most beautiful, intelligent, compassionate, fierce, determined woman, who set the bar which no other woman has ever come close to reaching."

Her lips moved behind her scarf but all he could see were her shining eyes, full of emotion.

He took a fortifying breath and stroked a loose lock of Sakura's sleep-mussed hair behind her ear, careful not to dislodge her scarf.

Holding her gaze, his heart in his throat, he confessed, "I see the woman who means everything to me."

Behind his mask he tried to smile.

"Itachi." He paused. "He will have to understand that he isn't the only one whose heart you stole," he tried to joke, tried not to choke on the jealousy that burned him inside, at the guilt that threatened to strangle him because surely she didn't need his affections cluttering up her plate of responsibility, but he could not give her up. "Because I have felt his way for a long, long time. And I don't see it changing. Ever."

"Kakashi," breathed Sakura, her hand lifting to cover his upon her cheek.

She closed her eyes.

"Sakura." He twined his fingers with hers.

She turned her face up while he leaned down, pressing their foreheads together, sharing their breath.

"Do you remember what you said to me, my first day as your student?"

She chuckled under her breath.

"I hear you have an attitude; let's be friends?"

Kakashi chuckled, too. Maintaining contact, he shook his head lightly. "No. You said, " _As long as you keep trying, I'll never give up on you."_ " He shifted her so she was as close as he could cradle. Sakura threaded her fingers through his wild hair, occasionally tugging at small portions like a bird. He found it relaxing. He pressed against her forehead, nudging her, and added, "I never gave up on you, either."

At her rueful chuckle, he nuzzled her covered cheek meaningfully, before whispering a hair's breadth from her mouth—

"And it will always be your choice."

Suddenly Sakura's grip in Kakashi's hair tightened and he opened his eyes, surprised to find hers wide and scrutinizing him intently. Then he felt her breathing hitch before she tugged his ragged mane one last time, just enough to bring his mouth to hers.

"Please," she whispered, begged, against his covered lips, kissing him. "Please, Kakashi."

"Tell me," he demanded, squeezing her _closerclosercloser_.

"Please, stay."

With that, she brought their entwined hand to the edge of the scarf, tucked his fingers inside it.

His heart skipped a beat as he felt the smoothness of her skin, as, an inch at a time, she revealed herself to him. Sakura let the scarf pool loosely over her shoulders as she looked up at Kakashi's adoring face.

His jaw agape, he drank in the sight of her.

"So beautiful," he whispered.

She smiled at him tremulously.

"It's supposed to be."

"Not the seal. You."

To his surprise, she blushed and bit her lower lip before giving him a crooked smile.

"I showed you mine."

The line from her birthday card.

He hesitated as he brought his hand to his own mask.

He swallowed, gathering his courage.

Sakura, with a playful smirk, tapped his nose. "Building up the anticipation? I didn't know you were a tease."

He blushed even as he scoffed under his breath.

"The last person who saw me without mine was my Dad, when I was a genin."

"Naruto, Ino and Sasuke are the only ones who've ever seen mine. Outside of Jiraiya and Tsunade, of course, when they initially examined it. And, when he cast it, Itachi. It's a small club."

His body tensing, brow furrowing, Kakashi looked into Sakura's eyes.

"Not since?"

She tilted her head at him before understanding what he asked, then shook her head.

"Not since the night he formed the seal's jutsu."

Because she didn't want to torment him with the reminder. Of course.

Still.

Kakashi's hand was gentle as he stroked the softness of her skin over the pulse at her throat.

"I can't feel it. There's no difference in texture. It's like a tattoo."

She poked his shoulder, pouting.

"Quit stalling."

He chuckled, ducking his head though his ears were pink.

"Prepare to be underwhelmed. I don't have anything as beautiful as this on me. Well… perhaps I have something better in front of me," he said, stroking Sakura's back.

"Who would ever have thought Hatake Kakashi would be a tease," she said, smiling at him. Every tooth was straight, and white, and _oh sweet kami she was his everything_ —

His heart leapt rapturously in his chest, threatening to beat straight out of his body it was so fierce. She was dazzling him all over again.

"So beautiful," he couldn't help himself remark as he memorized every curve and flush of her freshly revealed face.

"Kakashi!" She slapped his shoulder and he stifled his wince.

"Fine, fine," he mumbled, reaching up. "I promised."

"You did."

And with that he slid his finger beneath his own mask, yet just as quickly felt a smaller hand invade at the same time. Curious, he raised his brows as he watched Sakura bite her bottom lip.

"I want to help."

His blush burned him.

"Okay." Had his voice always sounded so hoarse? Also, fast or slow? Should he just pull it all off at once, or—

The dilemma was quickly solved as Sakura gasped when she gently pulled his mask down and away, revealing himself to her fully.

"Yo," he said, giving her his usual eye-crease smile.

—or, he was smiling, until he felt her lips press against his. Then he moaned into her mouth, she grabbed him and threw him down onto her bed.

He promptly drowned himself in her.

**OoO**

Kakashi had thought it would end there when he responded. He was sure Sakura would kiss him only a moment or so before pulling back, looking down, sending him away or worse, apologising. He never wanted it to end.

Which was why he poured every ounce of his devotion into the kiss; his lips melting into hers as he felt her body conform to his as her legs straddled his waist; her heart beating against his, her fingers digging into his shoulders through his long-sleeve Jounin shirt as she tried to pull him closer and still bury his frame into her mattress with her weight. She slanted her head in just the right way to further their kiss and instinctively he brought his hand up to cradle the back of her head and hold her there, his heart yearning for her.

He opened his lips, in part to inhale but mostly in invitation, and sighed when he felt Sakura's tongue trace the tip of his tongue as he welcomed her inside him. He sighed in satisfaction, bringing his other hand around to Sakura's back to stroke his fingers down her spine through her pyjama camisole. It was light, ridiculously flirty for a ninja, but soft, strong, and made of a quality that impressed him when he accidentally dug his fingers into her back when she nipped him, surprising him and making his breath catch. He felt her chuckle against and relaxed, understanding she didn't hold it against him.

"I'm not made of sugar, Kakashi," she breathed against his throat as he moved away from his lips and trailed kisses down his jawline. It was the middle of the night and he had the beginnings of stubble, and the friction she created against his skin felt incredible to him. He had never felt it before. He wanted to feel it again and rubbed his cheek against hers, relishing the contact before moving to Sakura's throat to make love to it with his mouth.

Her wanton moan told him he'd found exactly what he meant to. He felt his Sharingan spin with the intensity of his feelings, his triumph, his desperation.

He closed his eyes as he held Sakura to him, his blood pulsing in his veins. He felt Sakura run her fingers through his hair, gently tugging on certain locks to draw a needy groan from his throat. She pulled away his hitai-ate.

Opening his natural eye, Kakashi released Sakura's throat to gaze up at her. She looked down at him, his hitai-ate in her one hand, before she set it down beside them, on her night stand.

Kakashi struggled to breathe.

His grip in Sakura's hair tightened, then trembled.

"I thought you couldn't… you said you didn't enjoy…" he tried to form the words, but his hoarse voice failed him.

She shook her head a bit, her eyes softening.

"And yet I'm feeling this." She shook her head. "I don't understand it, but I feel this, Kakashi."

His eye on hers, he swallowed.

"What about Itachi?"

Sakura looked down at him, then stroked her fingers along his cheek.

"He'll stay out. I told him to."

Kakashi's brows lowered, eye narrowing.

"He will stay out," promised Sakura. "He knows to stay out."

"A conversation you've had with him before?"

Sakura's voice was soft, but even, when she replied.

"For my kunoichi work, we had to. He will only intrude if I feel I'm in danger."

"I'm not a kunoichi mission," said Kakashi, watching her reactions carefully.

He was surprised by how much Sakura's expression gentled at first with her smile, then turned sultry and confident. "No," she agreed as she dipped her head to his again, rubbing her nose against his. "You're not."

As much as he wanted to continue, he didn't know if he'd be able to give her up if this went further.

"Is this a one night stand to you?" he asked, barely above a whisper. "Because it isn't to me," he added.

Sakura paused in her butterfly kisses.

His hands fell to her back and slid around her, holding her close to him.

"It would never be, for me," he breathed against the shell of her ear; he felt her shiver in his arms. His heart tripped in his chest as his vulnerability made his stomach retract; to stifle the butterflies that had disappeared from Sakura's lips and reappeared inside him. "Don't do this to me as a pity, Sakura," he begged, closing his eyes. "Don't do this if you don't mean it, too."

"Kakashi…"

"Because he used you to get to me, and I don't want to be your retaliation." His jaw clenched, and he opened his eyes and looked away. "That isn't what this should be."

Sakura's brow sagged, her lips closing on the words she was about to say.

"You said… before, you told me that some things were special. That they should be kept special."

Sakura breathed, listening. She gave the faintest nod. She gave him her undivided attention. His heart fluttered, as strange as it was to try and qualify the feelings in his chest.

"This. This is special. I want…" He swallowed, pink rushing to his cheeks. "I want special. With you. For you. To you. To give you."

_Gods, please don't make me say it outright_ , he thought to himself, mortified, terrified, occupied by his vulnerability.

And despite it all, hopeful beyond belief.

Because without her mask, so many of Sakura's emotions could be seen in her expression; her joy, her hurt, her surprise and her dawning realization.

Her lips moved and made no sound.

He lifted a trembling hand, no matter how hard he tried to keep it steady, to her sealed cheek and drew her eyes to his.

He had to clear his throat, twice, before he added,

"Because I love you too much to be less than honest with you."

Sakura stiffened in his arms.

"I love you," he repeated. "I will always love you. But it will kill me to see you with him, if…" He swallowed.

Sakura's hand lifted to his at her cheek. Holding his gaze, she squeezed his fingers before pulling them away from her skin.

Kakashi's heart fell halfway to his stomach before he realized Sakura had not released him yet. Rather, it was her turn to swallow before moving his hand closer to her, closer, closer, closer, until he felt the warm softness of her soft skin beneath his fingers, beneath her shirt, against her beating, naked breast. The shock of touching her so intimately sent electricity buzzing down his spine. His body stirred to attention so quickly he worried he'd faint from lightheadedness as every ounce of blood in his body retreated southwards.

"Make love to me, Kakashi," she whispered.

His eyes fixed upon her her lips.

She gave him a nervous smile. "I love you, you…" She gave a shaky sigh, and her smile softened. "I love you."

When he didn't respond, she quirked a brow.

"I love you," she said, leaning down, nuzzling his throat. "I love you," she repeated, squeezing his hand around her breast, teaching him with her fingers how to tease and touch her. "I love you," she said, voice deepening as she brought a hand to his side, slipping beneath his shirt to run her fingers along the waist of his trousers. They stopped at the buckle, and she danced her fingers up and down his treasure trail, smiling into his skin. "I love every inch of you," she said, confidence returning.

Growling at how ticklish and sensitive his tummy was, Kakashi spent less than a half second debating before flipping them over and kissing Sakura soundly, grinding his now obvious interest into her with purpose and intent.

She gasped as she released him, setting both her hands about his buckle.

"Up," he growled, and Sakura sat up only far enough for Kakashi to tear off her camisole.

"Your trousers, off," she ordered, just as eager as he. He obliged her, placing his hands on either side of her shoulders on the bed and lifting his entire lower body up.

Sakura swallowed before stripping them, and his boxers, off. She took the opportunity to brush her fingers down his firmly muscled abdomen, appreciating every defined inch, purring.

Kakashi's shoulders tensed and twitched as he lowered himself down and Sakura lifted his shirt and licked his sternum; at the last minute she trapped his arms in the sleeves and with her strength, held him there. He looked at her with heated eyes as she leaned forward, her eyes on his, and sucked on first one male nipple, then the other. She didn't miss the way his toned stomach arched and flexed as her tongue laved attention on him; it made her smile.

He struggled to free his arms after a moment of the torture and she laughed and let him go; which was good as he wasted no time in kissing her senseless, his fingers drawing patterns on her sides, leaving what felt like smoking trails in their wake on their way to her sleep shorts.

"Play with me, first," Sakura breathed into his mouth, collecting his hands in hers and sweeping them upwards until they cupped and weighed her breasts again. She groaned in her throat as his thumbs began circling her nipples. "Yes, like that." She arched into his hands. "Just like that," she sighed as he settled into the cradle of her hips.

Rolling his hips into her to relieve some of the pressure from the electrical storm that was building inside him, Kakashi's breath whooshed out of him as he felt the softness of her body welcoming his, Sakura's warm legs wrapping around his middle and drawing him in closer. He had never been so excited or so scared, whether singularly or together.

_Don't let go, don't let go, don't let go,_ he reminded himself, mastering himself as the tension mounted. Sakura wasn't even fully undressed and he was struggling.

But the feel of her under his fingertips, the velvet softness and the delicate skin, and the puckering tightness were testing his resilience in a way they'd never been tested before.

_Listen_ , he told himself, leaning down to kiss Sakura on the mouth. _Listen to her breathing. Listen to her whine. Listen to her whimper,_ he told himself, focusing. Just like the young woman said, years ago, courtesy of Jiraiya. Listen.

And when he heard her gasp and roll her hips into him, her head thrown back, he realised his brothel-teacher had been exactly right.

Her nails scratching down his back to halt and grab at his backside, pulling him closer to press tighter against her core, Sakura's face looked half-pained as she gasped for more.

"Pull, just a little," she begged, rolling her hips into his.

So focused was he on his task that Kakashi almost didn't notice the tension to his shoulders until it spread to his lower back and into his sack, warning him.

His brows furrowing, he swallowed, sweat dripping down his back to follow the trails of microelectricity shooting through him. Panting, he grit his teeth and grabbed Sakura's hips, grinding into them to try and ease his need before it was ended disappointingly.

"Kami, sorry," gasped Sakura, pulling her knees up and slipping her shorts off from under his fingers. She took his hand and brought it to her core and dipped his fingers in to reassure him when he hesitated, panting just as hard as he was. "Do you want me to guide you…" She asked, but Kakashi shook his head, eyes narrowed.

"No," he growled. Then his jaw clenched as he brought himself close to her molten heat. When he was aligned and his tip dipped into her, he caught her eyes.

"Go slow," she cooed, sweeping his sweaty bangs out of his eyes. She smiled at him before rising up to kiss him gently on the lips. "Easy," she murmured sweetly, rubbing his shoulder.

_Easy for you to say,_ he thought, as he advanced and he thought he was doing well until she squeezed him and he nearly unmanned himself. He glared at her for that. Minx.

She bit her lip and looked up at him. "Sorry. Eager."

Shoulders shaking, Kakashi gave her a dark look. Then pushed in hard, and smirked, enjoying her velvet grasp and blissful curse.

"You're a bad man, teasing me," she said, adjusting to his pleasant girth. With her hands on his shoulders, she snugged him in closer, smiling.

"You're a bad woman, tricking me," he retorted before finding a rhythm. Grabbing her knees he yanked her closer, swallowing when he rubbed up against a particular ridge inside her and feeling her clamp down on him like a sweet vice. "Fuck," he swore, holding on and knowing he would leave marks in Sakura's thighs tomorrow as he rode out her undulating waves. For her part, Sakura's mouth had fallen open as she shivered around him at the intimacy.

"I felt it," she gasped a moment later, wetness around her eyes. "I felt you, Kakashi," she said. "I want more..."

Kakashi's brows furrowed.

"I… I've never… before, I," she struggled to find words, and gentling his touch Kakashi reached for her and took her hand. "It… with someone else, it never worked before. What are you doing to me?" she asked, looking at him in wonder.

All he could do was stare at her beautiful face, pleasured and flushed and glowing, and then struck dumb, all he could think was, _More what?_

Hips stilling for a moment to let her body rest, Kakashi's mind whirled. She'd never felt what before?... He tried to figure out what she meant… and then it hit him.

Climax. Because of the curse seal, she had never felt one before.

But she'd felt one with him.

_And she wanted more._

He licked his lips as part of his readings from the Uchiha temple's secret room surfaced in his mind.

Sasuke had been right about the temple floor and the hidden scrolls; and somehow there hadn't been a single Uchiha around when Kakashi had stolen in and found what he was looking for. It was incomplete, but it was enough.

Did she want it, though…

His heart squeezed.

_If she doesn't, it won't work,_ he thought simply. But if she does...

"Ready?" he asked, the question double-edged. He smoothed his hands down Sakura's hips and leaned forward, kissing her firm stomach.

She let out a happy sigh and nodded, running her hand through his hair, making it stick up worse, no doubt. She had never given up on rubbing his hair, he thought, and it came to him then that it must be one of her favourite features about him. Warmth spread through him at the notion and he gave her a gentle smile, leaning his head closer so she could thread her fingers through more easily.

"Yes," she said, smiling at him.

He began slowly, kissing his way across her shoulders as he massaged her sides, his hips rolling almost gently into her, pushing forward and down in a new rhythm. Her arms coming to clasp around the back of his neck and holding him there as the kiss waltzed its way to her smile. With a buck or two Sakura urged him on, but he maintained his pace. The pace and timing were so crucial.

Deepening the kiss and his thrusts, Kakashi took their rhythm up a notch as he felt the electricity buzzing through him again, stronger now. Was it her seal connection to Itachi? Was it his affinity for lightning? Was it emotion taking physical form? He didn't know. But it felt like an incredible phenomenon as it coursed, stronger and stronger, through him, powering his body as he let an inch of his control slip and pushed harder, harder, harder into Sakura to hear her small cries and whimpers of _more, more, more._

"I can feel you, Kakashi," whispered Sakura, the same awe as before tinting her words into a loving song. "Please, please, I can feel you."

Building inside him, he felt the storm coalescing; lightning clouds and thunder rumbling through him in warning.

For he remembered his father's warning, once, when he was so young and didn't understand it.

But he understood it now.

His pace hastening, Kakashi grit his teeth together as he tried to focus on Sakura's sounds and cries. He grabbed a pillow from beside them and without breaking his pace, slid it under her hips to adjust their angle; Sakura's pitch shifted higher in appreciation, and he would have congratulated himself if he hadn't been so desperately trying not to tear his nails through her sheets with the tension thrumming through him.

Every cell in his body focused, and he began drawing his chakra to his core.

_Once,_ his father had said, _just once._

It only needed to be once.

He smoothed his hands over Sakura's stomach before bringing his hand to her swollen button and rubbing first soft, then firm circles, and pressing down with steady pressure on her lower belly; she was nearly there.

Would this make him as much of a monster as Itachi?

"Sakura," he groaned, stepping up his pace just a little bit further. "If you could be free of his seal, would you do it?"

"Yes, Kakashi," she gasped as his fingers played on. But she had been chanting that for a while.

"If it meant taking on another bond, would you do it?" he asked, sweat dripping down his face as he felt her womb shift at his words. _There!_ His own core charged, Kakashi held his hand in place over Sakura's lower belly, felt the tension string taut inside her. He thrust harder, deeper, faster, as his lower back coiled tight in warning. Sakura's trembling hands grabbed Kakashi's straining arms; strained not from exertion but from focus.

He began his countdown.

"Kakashi, just don't stop," she begged. "Please, this… I… Please… I've never felt like this…"

Her legs shaking around him, Kakashi clenched his eyes shut. So much feeling. So much, so much, so much.

The coil sank forward and down, and Kakashi knew it was heartbeats away.

"I can feel you, Kakashi," she pleaded. "I can feel your heartbeat inside me."

" _It was like a second heartbeat to me. I've never regretted it for a second."_

"I'm close," he warned her. _Last chance. Tell me to stop. Please, tell me to stop. No, fuck it. Don't ever tell me to stop. I want to make love to you for the rest of my life_.

"Yes!" Sakura thrashed, then arched right off the bed, her nails digging into Kakashi's arms. "Every day, for the rest of our lives!"

Which was when he realized she had heard what he had said in his head.

That was it; Kakashi could hold back no longer.

The shivering electricity took hold of him, he shot lightning and released his storm inside her, chakra and all; past her defenses, past her own chakra barrier, and electrifying them both. At some point she reached for him and threaded her fingers through his over her womb.

The resulting explosion blinded him and his vision went white as they both shouted their release.

Then, boneless, he fell to Sakura's side. He reached for her and pulled her closer, trembling heart to trembling heart, breath mixed with breath, soul mixed with soul, naked inside and out. Their fingers still intertwined.

"You are Hatake now," he murmured, barely coherent as he drifted off to sleep. _And I am home._

**TBC**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: FYI, I think this story will tap out at about 13 chapters plus epilogue.
> 
> I don't usually ask for reviews, but I admit I could use the pick-me-up at the moment. I just went back to school this week for a certification program at university again. I apologize for the lack of review replies for this round, my time is short. I read and appreciate every review, though. They keep me going and make me smile!
> 
> (So, please review?) 8)
> 
> Have a great weekend and thank you for reading!


	11. Age 18/19: ANBU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Goodbye

**Chapter 11**

_**Several days later** _

Swallowing through his swollen jaw, Kakashi looked up at the moon with his natural eye and let its beams bathe him a moment.

Then, adjusting his pack, he leapt from his window ledge and left Konoha through its gates.

His mission would keep him from home for a good, long time.

* * *

_**Just after Kakashi left Sakura, several days earlier** _

Back in Sakura's apartment, she wiped at the wetness on her cheek, soaking her scarf.

"Why?"

Staring hard at her, Itachi stood there, accepting her frustration, anger, despair.

"Why? Why would you do that? It's never been an issue before! For kami's sake, I partake in the same number of kunoichi missions as anyone else, and you've never—"

"I felt it."

"What? What kind of excuse is that?!" Lashing out, Sakura threw her arms wide. "What are you talking about?"

At this, Itachi dropped his arms at his side. "I felt it," he repeated, his voice level.

"You—… you felt it," her voice had begun as a yell and faded to a whisper. "What does that mean?"

Itachi took a step closer, slipping his hands into Sakura's loosened hair, cupping her cheek.

He shook his head.

"It's too late," he said. "It doesn't matter."

Her tears resurfacing, Sakura's composure collapsed and she fell into Itachi's chest, beating on him with her chakra-less fists. She sobbed into him, even as he brought his arms around her to hold her close.

"Your kimono will be ready in a few weeks," he continued, stroking her back. "The Hokage has been informed. The Elders have relented and given their blessing."

He leaned down and kissed the top of her head.

"I will give you everything," he promised.

_But you can never make me happy,_ wailed Inner Sakura.

This she knew, because she'd found her happiness. Had shuddered and sighed with it, in fact, while Itachi was on the other side of the door.

* * *

_**Two days after Kakashi's night with Sakura** _

Tsunade stared at the young man's covered face.

"What happened to you?"

"I fell into a doorknob."

Her blond brow arched.

"How bad is it? Do you need a medic?" She leaned back and folded her arms across her ample bosom. "Sakura would never let you walk around like that."

"Long term. ANBU HQ said I needed to clear all long-term missions with you prior to accepting, due to my rank."

Tsunade's eyes narrowed in on him and the mild slur in his words. "Did someone break your jaw?" Her voice was somewhat incredulous.

"Here is the mission I would like to accept." He held out a scroll to Tsunade, ignoring her questions. "It is solo, long term."

"What are you pulling, kid?"

"I estimate the mission will require my participation for eight to ten months outside Konoha's borders, and possibly several follow-up missions thereafter to ensure conformity and compliance, once initiated."

"Hatake."

Kakashi laid the scroll on her desk.

The Hokage stomped to her feet and glared at him.

"You aren't taking a suicide mission. It's a waste of your talent, and frankly, overdramatic even for you. I won't let you," she snapped. "Sakura would never forgive me."

"This is an A-ranked mission, not S-ranked."

Oh, Tsunade knew what he was playing at now. She scoffed under her breath.

"You think this will work?"

Kakashi said nothing.

Letting out a long, low breath through her nose, Tsunade picked up the scroll and read it over. It wouldn't kill him.

She scrawled her name at the bottom and threw it at him.

"You think this is the best time to run, when she needs you most?" She called after him as he turned to leave.

"If she needed me, she wouldn't have said yes," he said, not bothering to turn around.

As he climbed up onto her windowsill—because since when did he use doors?—he looked at Tsunade over his shoulder.

"Thank you."

And then he was gone.

* * *

Day turned into night turned into day for Kakashi.

The mission went on, so he went on.

One afternoon as he patrolled the forest bordering a meadow—he would be meeting a contact thereabout in a day's time and wanted to ensure no traps had been set for him prior to—his ninken signalled him silently by lowering to the ground and shaking their heads and tails. They'd found something.

Ensuring he wasn't under surveillance, he conjured a pair of clones. One he sent ahead of himself to continue scouting, the other he sent underground to verify whatever his pup had become interested in.

When he knelt beside his pup he leaned forward; Pakkun joined him, pawing at the ground.

"That looks familiar," said Pakkun in his gravelly voice.

"Hmm," agreed Kakashi. In his chest he felt his heart skip a beat before it returned, beating once strongly, then again in echo.

He reached out to stroke the leaves with his fingertip.

* * *

It was mid afternoon in one of her family's greenhouses when Ino glanced down at the small patting at her ankles.

"Yes?" she looked around and saw no master for the lean, whiplike hound at her feet. He gave a quick yip and turned sideways, showing her his saddle bags.

"Did you bring me a present, poochie?" She knelt down and pet him on his sleek head.

She withdrew the first delicately wrapped package from the saddle bag, unfolding the edges before her fingers stilled. She looked up at the dog only to find three more dogs sitting and wagging their tails on her other side. Each one wore an adapted saddle bag, swollen with small, identically wrapped packages.

Her rounded shoulders sagged as she smirked to herself.

"Making me your messenger pigeon? Brat," she muttered, sending her hair over her shoulder with a toss of her head.

She cleared her work table to accept and catalog the plants, her brow arching as she found a crumpled paper wedged inside one of the packets.

Both her brows knit before slowly lifting to her hairline as she read it.

* * *

Sasuke and Naruto glanced at the back of the small ramen shop upon hearing the door open and close, but it was another false alarm.

"She hasn't been out to lunch in a while," said Naruto, poking at his second bowl.

"She has a lot of work to do," replied Sasuke.

Naruto's hand stilled. "Not that much. Things aren't that dire. She's looking for work to do." He stirred his fish cake around in his still half-full bowl. "She's making busy work for herself." His shoulders hunched as he murmured, "She's pushing people away. She's pushing me away. She's like my sister and she's pushing me away."

"She is busy with more than work," said Sasuke, voice even.

To Sasuke's surprise, Naruto scoffed under his breath. His eyes narrowed on the blond.

"She's leashed. She already feels it," said Naruto, fingers tightening on his chopsticks. "Bastard, I think… I think her heart hurts. It is killing her, faking being happy. She's not. She wears her heart on her sleeve and now she's having to fake it all and she's exhausted."

Sasuke stared down at his cup of tea a moment before taking a sip.

It was silent between them before Naruto's face hardened and he took a breath.

Not looking at Sasuke, Naruto spoke to the counter.

"When she becomes your real sister, are you going to leave her out to dry like this? When she's under your roof, a puppet to the clan, are you going to turn your back on her then, too?"

Sasuke's grip on his cup tightened.

"What do you expect me to do?" bit out Sasuke, a muscle in his jaw jumping.

"I don't know! But it's your clan! Your brother. Our sister!" burst out Naruto, his hands clenching into fists in his lap, his blue eyes torn apart like his heart. "If this is how she's acting now, how much worse will it get when she's fully inducted and they start hounding on her for a kid? Or to retire?"

"The Hokage won't let that happen."

"They'll convince Sakura that it's what's best, and Sakura will do it because she doesn't want to upset things. Because she feels hopeless and powerless, and she is resigned, bastard! Resigned to this, since she was twelve. Your clan has been playing head games with her since she was a kid!"

At Sasuke's warning glare, Naruto hushed his voice but continued his rant.

"First she wasn't Uchiha, so she'd never be good enough. Then she wasn't from a clan, so she couldn't be worth anything. Now, after years of microaggressions, they're finally going to have to welcome her in because they have no other choice, and she's so stressed and anxious she's barely coming out of her home to get groceries, let alone socialize, because she feels ostracized and can't face being stuck inside the walls of your clan compound!" His eyes flashed red. "She's barely sleeping, her eyes have bags she isn't even bothering to hide, and she's losing weight. Yes, she is. I tried to hug her the other day and picked her up by accident." He shook his head, frustrated. "She didn't even hit me, just sighed and told me to put her down. Something's not right, Teme. There's something more happening. But she won't talk to me." His tanned, scarred hands tightened on his chopsticks before letting them go, falling to the sides of his bowl.

Sasuke watched Naruto's broad shoulders sag, felt his own weighing down heavier to match.

"She won't talk to me. She always talks to me," Naruto said, his voice softening. He lifted his hand as if to run through his hair before it dropped to his side, forgotten. "She won't talk to me about anything, anymore. It's like she sees me, but doesn't, you know? She isn't… engaged."

"The wedding isn't for a few months. She'll pick herself up," said Sasuke. "She's adjusting."

Naruto stilled on his stool, to Sasuke's surprise.

Then the blond dropped some money on the counter, stood up, and walked away leaving Sasuke by himself.

Teuchi rushed over, mumbling to himself and collecting Naruto's half-full bowl, wondering what was wrong and if he should have someone check on the boy, but Sasuke was only peripherally aware of his puttering.

The bell above the door jangled as Naruto walked out, not looking back at Sasuke.

The Uchiha swallowed his sigh.

Which was how he ended up walking the halls of Konoha's main hospital that evening, after finding Sakura's apartment empty.

He wasn't checking up on her. He had things to discuss. Things like… like… training.

He resisted the urge to shake his head at himself, but not by much.

He was getting sentimental.

Knocking on Sakura's office door, he entered after a moment and stopped in his tracks.

"Good evening, brother," murmured Itachi from behind Sakura's desk. He was surrounded by her piles of paperwork, patient files and folders. Lifting his dark head up, his ponytail slipped over his shoulders and he met Sasuke's eyes a moment before returning to the report he was drafting.

Sasuke nodded, looking around. There she was; sleeping on the sofa.

"She is resting," added Itachi in a quiet voice.

"Is that your work or hers?" he asked, curious.

"Irrelevant. Is there something I can help you with?"

"I came to see Sakura."

"Another med-nin can see you," said Itachi.

Sasuke looked more carefully at his brother.

"As a friend," he added.

"She is resting," repeated Itachi. He stopped writing.

Sasuke's attention flickered back to Sakura.

"Is she not feeling well?"

"She needs to rest, she is physically well."

And that leaves the door open for interpretation for others… Again Sasuke stifled the urge to shake his head.

"I came to invite her to dinner. She needs to eat," he said, taking a step closer to his former team mate.

And it was then that Sasuke realized he had unconsciously lowered his guard around his brother, for suddenly Itachi stood between him and Sakura and his chakra signature was low, but loud enough for Sasuke to feel, beating in time with his pulse. Sasuke's hackles rose as he slowed his pace, but continued approaching Sakura.

"Sasuke," said Itachi, his voice harbouring a strange inflection.

"Dinner, Itachi. She's still my friend, even if she's going to be your wife." A part of him he thought he'd outgrown reared its ugly head and he nearly rolled his eyes at his brother. "That isn't changing, no matter what happens."

It was then that Itachi's eyes bled to the first stage of his Sharingan.

"Leave her," commanded Itachi, straightening and facing off against his younger brother. This time, his tone brooked no reproach; it was the tone of clan leader. A tone Sasuke had been conditioned to obey since birth.

Sasuke's feet immediately halted.

"What's wrong with Sakura?" he asked, instincts tingling with heightened awareness. His own Sharingan woke and his eyes shot to his sister-to-be. Itachi was faster, though, and blocked him.

"She is no longer your concern."

* * *

Peeling away the cooling eye mask, Ino groaned and turned on her lamp at her bedside table. Sometimes she wondered why she'd ever moved out on her own. Sure, it was nice to have friends over whenever she wanted, but living with her parents had certainly kept the lesser riff-raff away during the _middle of the goddamn night in the middle of the work week_.

"This had better be good," she growled as she opened her window to let in Naruto… and Sasuke.

Well, her night had just perked up considerably. Now, to expel Naruto…

"Something's up," said Sasuke, brows creased.

"You need to be more specific," Ino deadpanned.

"Sakura. Itachi did something to Sakura. He's not even letting the bastard near her."

Ino's head whipped around to Naruto's.

"Explain."

"He's overprotective, he's around her all the time, he's not letting me or Teme talk to her, or get lunch together. Any of it. It's all stupid!" Naruto flung his arms out, frustrated.

Ino lifted a hand. "Hold on. Since when. And why."

"We thought Sakura had been a bit introverted. Because of the wedding. And… because of Kakashi leaving without saying goodbye," admitted Sasuke. "We gave her a bit of space after she didn't want to come training for a bit, but now we can't get close enough to her to invite her to meals."

"Because of Itachi," seethed Naruto. He stalked around Ino's room. "Something's not right. This… This doesn't sound like Itachi, either. Like, he's…" He gestured wildly. "Territorial. It doesn't make sense! Itachi may not have liked me much, but he never controlled Sakura like this before. Protective is one thing, but sequestering? And kicking Sasuke out?"

"He kicked you out?" Ino's eyes were huge as she looked at Sasuke. He nodded.

"I tried to see her this evening. He wouldn't let me near her."

Ino sat down on her bed, rubbing the side of her face. Then she stopped, her mouth falling open.

She scrambled to her desk, yanking open drawers until she found what she was looking for. When she smoothed out the wrinkled paper she'd received, she took a closer look at it. Suddenly, connections in her mind began re-arranging themselves and she swallowed.

"We need to speak to the Hokage," she said.

* * *

Tsunade listened before sending Ino and Naruto outside her office.

She folded her fingers together and looked outside the windows at the rising sun.

"I am not going to ask you to betray your clan, or its secrets. But this is something that isn't for Naruto or Ino's ears, is that understood?"

"Yes," he replied.

Tsunade nodded.

"How much of this, of Itachi's behaviour, is him, how much is the clan, and how much is the jutsu?"

Sasuke's eyes narrowed.

"I ask," continued Tsunade. "Because until now, his behaviour was, for the most part, above reproach. I need to know what changed. I need to differentiate between the behaviour of the shinobi, the behaviour of the man, and the behaviour of the clan. Because if I go to the clan, I need to act as Hokage; there can be no feelings involved. I can't act on someone's feelings. I can act only on behaviour as it negatively affects a citizen, in this case, the Hokage's apprentice. If I intervene, this becomes a village issue."

She turned back to Sasuke, planting her elbows on her desk.

"Think hard, Sasuke. Is there any other reason you can think of, relating to that jutsu, that would have triggered a change in Itachi's behaviour? Perhaps one he himself isn't aware of."

Standing in place, Sasuke's brow furrowed.

"I'm not familiar with all aspects of it… it wasn't for me to know," he admitted.

Tsunade huffed, though there was a gentle edge to it.

"Understood." She rested her chin on her hands, her elbows digging into the desk. "I can't interfere with clan business."

"Could you check on her physically?"

Tsunade's eyes darkened and Sasuke was quick to correct himself.

"Itachi would never harm her."

"I should think not," snapped Tsunade.

"But maybe something else is wrong with Sakura."

"That she couldn't fix herself?" Tsunade snorted. "I trained that girl from the time she was a genin, brat."

"Chakra-related?" he suggested. "Exhaustion? You could release her from duty, or reassign her to the Tower. Temporarily."

_Where Itachi can't sequester her,_ went unsaid.

Pinning him with her intelligent amber eyes, Tsunade weighed his request.

"I'll see what I can do. Dismissed."

Sasuke nodded and departed.

* * *

Bracing herself against the bathroom sink, Sakura forced her eyes to open. Her dreams the last several weeks at night had been uncommonly vivid and lucid.

A pair of strong arms circled her waist and she felt the soft tendrils of Itachi's hair brush her neck. He leaned over her, pressing a kiss into her shoulder.

"Good morning," he murmured into her skin.

"G'morning," she yawned. Her scarf loosened as she stretched up on her toes before settling again. It remained in place, as she knew it would. "Did you sleep well?"

"Hn. Not as well as you. Do you need more vitamins?"

Sakura shook her head.

"I'm fine."

His eyes softening in concern, Itachi lifted a hand to her cheek, turning Sakura's face to his. His focus dipped down to the scarf bundled around her face and throat. "Still necessary?"

"Yes," she said, tensing as his fingers stroked along its edge.

His eyelids lowered and he withdrew his fingers; Sakura swallowed her relief.

"Ah," he replied. He kissed the top of her head. "I will walk you to work."

"I can walk fine on my own—"

"I enjoy walking you to work," he said, sliding away from her, his hands trailing down to her hips. He turned and left her to her own devices, closing the bathroom door behind him.

As futile as it was, Sakura stubbornly locked it behind him.

Alone in her privacy once more, Sakura reached up and pulled the scarf down, rolling it into a small ball on the counter. With a trembling hand she reached up to touch the seal.

She swallowed again at her reflection.

_What was happening?_

* * *

_**Far, far away, on a rare clear night in Ame** _

Alone as the moon rose high above him in the clear night sky, Kakashi felt a soft flicker against his cheek, then another in his hair. Around him the night was muted in its gentle harmonies; insects humming, leaves rustling, fireflies lending their nocturnal glow to highlight shadows and shifts in the breeze.

Reaching up the hand that had been resting behind his head, Kakashi ran a hand through the silver mop that crowned him before pulling his hand back.

Sakura blossoms.

The uncanny echo of his heartbeat quickened as he let out a low breath, his callused fingers curling protectively around the delicate petals.

His head fell back against the splayed trunk and branches of the mature cherry tree he rested in, and he closed his eyes to breathe in the faint perfume around him.

A flick of his wrist and a hand-sign later…

With a light gust of wind he was showered in petals.

**TBC**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: You are wonderful people. Thank you so much for your comments and reflections on Ch 10! I'm so glad to hear you enjoyed it. A heads' up that Ch 12 is shorter than usual, and Ch 13 is also brief.
> 
> The epilogue is more than 17 pages, however, to make up for it. We're nearly to the end! Expect Ch 12 & 13 in November, and then we'll tie off this story in December as a holiday treat. Sound good?
> 
> Huge kudos to users AijoInu and sleetfallrain for their immeasurable help revising and improving this story!


	12. Age 18/19: ANBU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A decision is made and a journey begins.

**Chapter 12**

_**(Approx 4 months after Kakashi left)** _

A piece of art fit to hang in any gallery or private collection.

The sakura tree, sprouting from its roots, the branches detailed in glorious texture and shade, its buds reaching towards the sky. Graceful, elegant, romantic in its simplicity and care. And its roots, tendrils of sustenance formed the subtlest uchiwa fan, if one looked at it the right way. The image stretched from its roots across a young woman's breastbone, up the length of her throat to spread its branches across her soft cheek.

A man could become mesmerized by such beauty. Fixated on it. Obsessed by his need to possess it.

Looking at the sketch in his hands, sealed away in a false wall for over twenty years, Jiraiya let out a long, low breath, his brows furrowed as he sat in the Hokage's office. He offered it to Tsunade, who accepted it and studied it.

He looked up at Tsunade. "It could change, with time. I haven't dealt with this one before and this wasn't a clean cast from the get-go."

"What could cause it to change?"

"Age. Weather. Chakra. Hormone imbalances. The phase of the moon, a change in their platonic or romantic situation, we don't know for sure. I haven't been able to monitor it as much as I would have liked."

Tsunade's eyes narrowed as her fingernails dug into her desk. "The Clan forbid it."

Jiraiya gestured vaguely with his hand. "Well, that isn't helping them with their future matriarch."

He flinched at Tsunade's look.

"How bad is it?"

Tsunade huffed under her breath.

"According to her friends, she isn't herself behaviour-wise. And she looks terrible. Bags, listlessness, lack of appetite." She shook herself. "Depressive."

Jiraiya observed Tsunade a moment, before venturing, "Her back?"

Tsunade shook her head.

"No one mentioned anything about it."

He tapped his fingers, one hand over the other.

"Nausea?"

She snorted.

"The way she looked at her bento the other day…"

She looked up at Jiraiya, paling.

The sketch of Sakura's seal dropped onto the desk, Tsunade's fingers losing all their monstrous strength in an instant.

* * *

"Out of the way!"

Sakura looked up from the scroll she was translating and towards the corridor. Her office was just around the corner from Tsunade's in the Tower, where she'd been summoned to help the Hokage catch up with her paperwork backlog (again). It had been a solid two weeks now and she still fought her lethargy, but it was a relief to have a quieter workplace again.

Usually.

" _Sakura? Get your arse out here!"_

Tsunade stormed to Sakura's door, banging on it with such a force Sakura saw cracks splinter like lightning bolt fractures in the casing.

Stowing her scroll and tools quickly, Sakura hurried to the door that her mentor had already torn open in her haste.

"My office, now," seethed Tsunade, fire in her eyes.

Peeking behind the Hokage, Sakura saw a small army of assembled ANBU; she nodded at Tsunade and scurried to her office.

The door slammed shut behind them before Tsunade herself cast the silence and privacy jutsu to seal it against eavesdropping and interruptions.

To her surprise, she saw Jiraiya leaning against Tsunade's desk, a concerned look in his eyes.

Her eyes flicked back to Tsunade who stared at her, strong emotions flickering across her unnaturally youthful face too fast for Sakura to catch them. The Hokage took a moment to compose herself as she took a seat at her desk, indicating to Sakura to sit.

Sakura waited to be addressed, her heart thundering in her chest.

"How far along," came Tsunade's hollow voice.

Sakura's words dried up.

"How far!"

Sakura flinched, her fingers digging into her thighs to ground herself.

She swallowed behind her scarf.

"Three to four months," she breathed.

Tsunade glared at her. "Which is it?"

"Seventeen weeks."

Tsunade ripped open the drawer that contained the mission log, and threw it on her desk. Flipping through a few pages, she stilled. Her shoulders tightened, and her arms shook.

"Does Itachi know it isn't his?" she asked her apprentice, voice disquietingly even as she stared at the calendar.

"He has an idea," said Sakura, very quiet.

Tsunade's shoulders fell as her hand rose to cover her mouth. She swore under her breath.

Swallowing her nerves, Sakura's chin fell as she stared at the floor. Shame burned her ears and down the back of her neck.

"Sakura," said Jiraiya, speaking up for the first time with a gentle voice. "The seal."

Her eyes widened as her head shot up to meet his dark ones. She pressed her lips together.

"Has the seal changed?" he asked, taking over from Tsunade.

The tension so high Sakura felt light-headed, she reached up with hesitant fingers, untying the scarf that hid her face from view and let it drop to her lap.

She heard Jiraiya's quick intake of breath before Tsunade swore again, louder this time.

"It's been a while since I've seen that one," said Jiraiya, a touch of easy humour in his voice. He reached out to squeeze Sakura's shoulder tenderly. "What did he say when you told him?"

Behind him they both heard Tsunade cursing the clans and their 'gods-damned secret proprietary forbidden jutsu'.

Sakura's face fell and she turned away as warmth wet her eyes.

"Oh, child," sighed Jiraiya, pulling her into his arms and hugging her. For once, sex was the furthest thing from his mind.

* * *

It was late into the night before Jiraiya finally pried Tsunade's hands off the new legislation she was drafting, citing that any clan found dabbling in forbidden bonding jutsu would volunteer its members as test subjects for her fantastically poorly aimed castration jutsu.

"She's going to be fine," assured Jiraiya, steering Tsunade to the nearest bar.

"She never deserved this!" She shook her fist at him. _It's grounds for a civil war_ , she thought, desperate.

"She's going to find her way," sighed Jiraiya as they passed a window in the Tower stairwell. "Look on the bright side. You're getting grandbabies!"

Tsunade halted at the words.

"Grandbabies," she murmured. Her fingers caught at air.

Jiraiya nodded.

"We're getting grandbabies. Finally."

"Grandbabies."

Leaning forward, he peeked into her eyes.

A hint of softness touched her emotional face.

"She'll need a better place to live. One with a yard," said Tsunade, looking out across the village.

The wrinkles in Jiraiya's tattooed cheeks relaxed, his wide mouth curving. "Ah."

"He needs to know he isn't going to be the last of his clan anymore," she said suddenly. "The Hatake will be a recognized clan again."

"If she calls off the wedding, yes," said Jiraiya, turning serious. "Otherwise, Itachi will raise him as an Uchiha."

Tsunade turned on her heel to stare at Jiraiya.

"You know he'll do it," he said, voice low. "He has never relinquished his influence over Sakura."

"But to watch someone else raise your own child," murmured Tsunade, her voice heart sick.

Jiraiya sighed, nudging Tsunade along again. "Why do you think he left?"

Feeling so much older, Tsunade was quiet, thoughtful, as she and Jiraiya sat at the bar, long into the night.

* * *

_**Konoha, later that week** _

Ino brought fresh flowers to Sakura's office in the Tower.

Tsunade stepping in to order Sakura back to a desk job there had been exactly what they all needed. Sakura's friends visited her again. She was no longer exhausted or endangered by over exerting herself for hospital emergencies. Tsunade herself monitored Sakura's condition. It was an enormous upgrade to her previous near-captivity.

Not all were as thrilled by it, however.

The Uchiha had taken to sending assistants to aid Sakura in her duties and their constant presence and interference irritated not only Sakura, but those around her.

On some days, Sakura would redirect them to a non-essential duty, out of the way. Otherwise, when their nagging at Sakura wore her down, the Hokage herself intervened and sent them packing.

Either way, it often left Sakura exhausted from balancing their many demands and 'suggestions'.

Watching from the corner of her eye, Ino saw Sakura pull out a very familiar drawer open to peek inside. She calmed after a breath or three before returning to her work, renewed if with sad eyes.

Finished watering the many plants adorning the office, Ino nodded at Sakura, smiled and waved good bye.

"See you at your place tonight?"

"Oh, not tonight," said the latest Uchiha spy. "She must rest. This evening Master Itachi returns from the Clan meetings and she will be required to attend him."

Ino stared at the dark haired cretin. Another pile of BS to keep Sakura from her? Really? Well, good thing she and Sakura were thick as thieves, or—

"Ah, I had forgotten about that," yawned Sakura. She raised her brows, grimacing at Ino. "Sorry, rain check?"

Ino blinked.

"We've been planning a night in for ages. You can't back out, Forehead."

Oh, that got a good sniff out of the wizened Uchiha.

Settling her hands over her serene midsection, the Uchiha pontificated, "She cannot be gallivanting about with the likes of irresponsible shinobi when she in such a delicate condition. She is carrying the next heir to the Uchiha."

Ino stared at the irritance long and hard, before she blinked. Slowly.

"I'll be over by seven thirty," she said evenly to Sakura, waving goodbye and ignoring everything else.

"Less than two weeks to the wedding and she's so disrespectful to you! You need to choose better allies for the Clan, My Lady!"

Closing her eyes a moment and rubbing her aching neck, Sakura made a sound in her throat. "I'm no one's 'Lady'," she reminded her, stifling her yawn.

"Hmph! You will be, and it is high time you act like it!"

"Mmm-hmmm," said Sakura non-committally.

* * *

Little did Sakura know, Ino did not head straight home.

Rather, she made a quick stop, dithered there, and somehow found herself back at the Tower again just in time to drop off a small care package with the Hokage before Tsunade returned to her home for the evening.

' _Trusting you'll see this gets where it needs to go'_ \- was all Ino's note read.

Then off she went to join Sakura at her apartment. She prayed it would be Uchiha-free.

For her part, Tsunade took one look at the contents and immediately summoned her fastest messenger-nin.

* * *

Kakashi looked up from his report. He'd given in and begun writing it out of pure boredom that morning.

The ANBU at his window, however, was weeks early.

"You'll be getting the abridged version if you want it now," Kakashi said, turning to look at the man. As he'd come to expect, he felt the double-thump of his heart in his chest as he changed position. While uncomfortable and unsettling at first, he accepted the echoing heartbeat and cradled the sensation closer, treasuring it.

But the ANBU shook his head.

"This is from the Hokage. You are to open it immediately and respond."

Kakashi accepted it, unrolling it as he eyed the winded ANBU.

"If you want a drink, the kitchen's that way."

The ANBU wavered before nodding.

"It was a long run. Thank you."

"Anytime," said Kakashi, turning to look down at the scroll. With a quick hand sign he released its contents, only to find two envelopes dropped in his lap.

The first was a wedding invitation. His jaw clenched as he swallowed the lump in his throat. He coughed to clear it.

With a heavy wariness to his movements he unsealed the second envelope with a kunai—and felt his heart drop into his stomach.

"Your response?" asked the ANBU.

Kakashi couldn't form words; behind his mask his lips were parted, frozen, as his mind stalled.

"Hatake?" The ANBU tilted his head. "Do you wish to reply?"

Shaking his head, Kakashi looked at the ANBU and made his decision.

"I'll deliver it myself," he said. "Give me ten minutes to pack." He looked at the contents of the second envelope again. "Five."

The ANBU's shoulders slumped, just a bit, and he nodded.

"Pack water," he said.

Kakashi had already conjured several clones to ransack his abode and repack his essentials.

He could make it in time if he really pushed it.

* * *

The grueling run lasted days, but when asked later Kakashi couldn't recount a single moment of it. He was sure he must have slept at one time or another; it took more than a week and a half to get back to Konoha, after all. Yet he couldn't remember it; not inn or tree or camp. It was a blur of _faster, faster, faster_ , and _harder, harder, harder_ , and _please don't let me be too late_.

_Not again._

_**Never again.** _

It was the wee hours of the morning when he arrived at Konoha's tall gates, having abandoned the too-slow ANBU somewhere along the way. During his race against time his thoughts were consumed by Sakura; how she fared; how she felt; how she coped.

_Was_ she coping?

Lungs screaming and chest pounding, he ignored the pair of shinobi manning the gate, not slowing an iota as he hurled his mission scroll at them.

"Hokage!" he yelled at them, voice hoarse from his heavy endurance run, pressing on. Hopefully they delivered it at some point. He didn't care.

They must have fumbled the scroll for he heard a rustling and cawing of birds, disturbed from their sleep into flight. Lazy guards; but all the better for him, he thought as he continued on.

The Village was a blur as he took to the rooftops, shredding across them as he fixed on his target. Anticipation stretched wings across his back and his heart thumped in his chest when he lay eyes upon his final goal.

_There_.

Her windows were dark, but that was to be expected at that time in the morning.

What he hadn't expected was the rain of kunai that shot past him; a warning barrage.

In a split-second later he felt _them_ surround him.

Kakashi twisted, looking over his shoulder then back in front of him. His charcoal eye narrowed at what he saw.

A row of Uchiha military police blocked his path to Sakura's apartment. More fell in behind him and several paced him at his sides, blocking him in.

The one in the middle, in front of him, called to Kakashi.

"Hatake. We urge you to cease and desist your immediate course of action at the request of the Uchiha clan head. You are to report to the Hokage's office for debriefing first thing in the morning. Take this time to rest and avoid this quarter of Konohagakure. Head Medic Haruno is in a delicate condition; the Uchiha clan head has extended his protection over her personally. Disturbing her means to disturb him."

_Like fuck are you stopping me now, Itachi,_ Kakashi thought as he reached for his kunai.

Then and there, Kakashi made his decision.

There were twelve Uchiha surrounding him. They'd sent a dozen to subdue him.

_Only_ , he scoffed under his breath. _Time to teach them what a Hatake can do._

It would take many more than that, he resolved, tightening his grip; because he was there to take on the Uchiha head on and he wasn't backing down.

Kakashi adjusted his stance. Straightened his shoulders and lifted his chin.

Seeing Kakashi's shift, the Uchiha's eyes bled to crimson as they, as one, activated their Sharingan.

So did Kakashi.

_I've come to claim my wife._

_And I've come to claim our son._

"They're my Clan, now," he growled.

Then he charged.

**TBC**

* * *

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many thank yous to my betas sleetfallrain and aijoinu for their immeasurable help! All mistakes remain my own.
> 
> For those who asked me about commissions, the information is now available on my tumblr (beyondthemoor). I have limited spots available.
> 
> Expect one more update later this month for "Soulmates", and then the grand finale in December!


	13. Age 18/19: ANBU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The final confrontation

**Chapter 13**

Heaving, blood trickling from more scratches and tears than he'd like to admit, Kakashi swallowed and gasped to draw in more air.

His heart kept double-pounding and skipping.

He'd noticed it for weeks now, but had chalked it up to a virus.

That it continued now, during and after such a harsh battle, confirmed it was more than that; and it corresponded with the paper folded in his breast pocket. As he closed in on Sakura's apartment he felt it pound stronger, steadier; steadying him.

Wiping at the blood seeping from his exposed Sharingan, he straightened his shoulders and dropped the last Uchiha onto the rooftop at his feet.

He felt the awareness of the chakra in Sakura's apartment; hers even and fluttering in her sleep… and another's, wary, waiting, leaking through the apartment like a suffocating miasma.

Kakashi's eyes narrowed.

* * *

Perched on the ledge of Sakura's windowsill, Kakashi tapped on her bedroom window. Sakura would be exhausted, of course. But she had never denied him entrance.

He was reaching to let himself in when he noticed different traps from when he last visited.

His eyes narrowed.

These weren't Sakura's traps.

Yet her chakra signature slumbered away on the other side. Which meant someone had reset them after she'd gone to bed.

He recognized the trace signature lacing the genjutsu layered over the traps immediately, a sick feeling settling in his stomach. After that afternoon on the forest floor in Sakura's lap, he would never forget the feel of Itachi's genjutsu. It was something akin to a light poison as it rubbed up against Kakashi's own chakra. The Uchiha's possessiveness of Sakura twisted and knotted Kakashi's patience like a rope, shortening it with each new layer he discovered.

Narrowing his eyes, Kakashi breathed out low and hard and reached inside himself. Would it work? Memories of his father's softly spoken words drifted to the surface of his memory. _("Mama knows I'm safe. We share a heartbeat." "Can you feel hers?" "Yes, she's just waking up. She can feel I'm home and happy to see her."_ )

And if Itachi didn't know that they could reach each other like this, then all the better.

_Wake up,_ he coaxed, focusing on Sakura. _Wake up, love._

No matter what, Itachi would never risk hurting Sakura. It was something Kakashi took great relief and confidence in. Sakura could release the traps safely. How Itachi felt towards Kakashi was another matter entirely but he would cross that bridge when he came to it.

Kakashi waited another moment for Sakura to wake before gathering his chakra inside him and reaching out through his heart to her.

_I'm home._

It was tangible when he felt the stirring through their shared heartbeat. Then, a second later she was shoving aside her blinds, releasing the traps and staring at him with her emerald eyes wider than saucers. Her scarf that night was sage, matching the eyes that shone at him in adoration.

Something in Kakashi immediately began settling yet yearning for her all the more and he pressed his hands to the glass, unable to look away from her.

… _missed … you…_ he made out her sigh from his heart.

On the other side of the pane Sakura's palm matched his and she smiled sleepily at him from beneath her scarf.

The racing of his heartbeats soothed as she opened the window for him, dispelling the last of the genjutsu and traps with her touch. He stepped through to land in front of her. And when he finally laid eyes upon her in full, he swallowed.

She had a bump.

A little baby bump over her abdomen.

Kakashi reached out, hand trembling, only for Sakura to disappear in a puff of smoke, replaced with a slipper that dropped to the floor.

Instead, before him now appeared the simmering stygian gaze of Uchiha Itachi, blocking Kakashi's view of Sakura who stumbled onto her bed, another Itachi—likely a clone—standing guard over her.

"You are intruding," said Itachi, arms loose at his sides.

"My wife invited me in," countered Kakashi. "Ask her."

Itachi's eyes narrowed on him but Kakashi straightened and refused to be cowed.

Sakura tapped Itachi's clone, dispelling him.

"Itachi, I opened the win—"

"You need your rest," said Itachi at Sakura, his gaze fixed on Kakashi. "And Sakura is to be my wife. Perhaps you did not receive your invitation? The wedding is tomorrow."

Kakashi glared at Itachi with his dichromatic eyes still exposed from his fight with the Uchiha guards outside.

"Sakura and I are married. We're already expecting our first child. You will cancel your nuptials," said Kakashi evenly, standing his ground. "Unless you want to be stood up at the altar."

"Itachi, listen to—" Sakura broke in, anger rising as the men moved toe to toe. She approached him from behind, but his focus was on Kakashi.

"It is impossible for her to carry another man's child," said Itachi, cutting off Sakura.

"Your jutsu was flawed. It could be overridden if both parties wished it, as long as it was cast by another Sharingan user," said Kakashi. "I read the scrolls. The jutsu was not created or intended to control anyone," explained Kakashi. "It was meant to be a blessing of love to bind them together and… produce a child for a married couple seeking a family." He held Itachi's gaze. "The reason it never worked for you was because Sakura didn't love you the way you did her."

Itachi's eyes slipped from ink to crimson in a split-second and it was the only warning Kakashi received before Itachi's tanto crashed down upon Kakashi's own sword, slashed from its sheath on his back just in time to parry.

"The seal was meant to show the woman was to be protected by her husband's clan while she was carrying his child, or preparing to carry his child," continued Kakashi with a grunt. "It was never meant to be a brand of possession; it was meant to be a symbol of commitment and solidarity and pride, proof that she was loved and protected. She is not an object to be owned, but a person to be cherished!"

"Both of you, stop this!" yelled Sakura from her bed where she had backed away from the battle; with the close quarters, she dared not interfere. Her incredible strength would only risk taking down the apartment building at this time if it missed its mark and hit part of the structure.

Another clash of blades and Kakashi and Itachi flew at each other, racing across the ceiling before launching themselves once more.

"You know nothing of how she feels," snarled Itachi.

"I know exactly how she feels. We share a heartbeat," said Kakashi, shifting his feet. He felt a trickle of blood trail down his arm and knew he was in worse condition than he should be, exhaustion and battle fatigue setting in. But he refused to give up.

Sweat beading on Itachi's elegant temple, matting his wild raven hair, he adjusted his grip on his tanto.

"Lies! You're a child, Kakashi. Stop this embarrassment and leave."

"Ask her!" Snapped Kakashi, flipping to the side and taking another controlled slice at his former mentor. A man he'd admired since before his own father had passed. A man who had betrayed him. Publically humiliated him. Whose heart was no doubt bleeding and who was retaliating because he could not bear to lose the woman he loved more than anything or anyone else in the world.

"You love her! You want her happiness! You know she would die for you—and she loves you, too. But she isn't _in love_ with you, Itachi. All you're doing is hurting her!"

"There is no way to undo the jutsu, none!" said Itachi, his sword catching Kakashi's shoulder. Kakashi hissed and retreated, adrenaline starting to run thin. Another dodge a hair too late. He bit down on his tongue and tasted blood in his effort not to cry out as his shoulder was speared before Itachi yanked his tanto back again.

"A soulmate bond can only exist between soulmates," growled Kakashi, holding up his sword but no longer advancing on Itachi. "And the seal can be supplanted if the new individual is the initial one's true soulmate." He panted, gathering his breath. "You knew this. It's why you tried to push us apart."

Itachi's face turned to ice, his chest heaving as he stared at Kakashi.

Kakashi swallowed. "I can prove it," he said, voice calming.

Itachi's brow wavered as he swallowed in turn.

"Sakura," said Kakashi, his eyes never leaving Itachi. "Show him."

Wiping a frustrated tear from her face, Sakura nodded, stepping off her bed through the wreckage of her room to join them.

She looked first at Kakashi who nodded to her, then turned to face Itachi.

Lifting her arms, she reached behind her head.

Itachi's eyes widened as his lips fell open. He began shaking his head.

"No," he breathed. "Not until tomorrow. I'm not to see it until—" He reached a hand up but Sakura had already untied the knot and let the scarf fall away.

"No," cried Itachi, voice hoarse and wounded. His outstretched hand trembled as his heart shattered to pieces in front of them. " _No,"_ he repeated.

"Itachi, I'm sorry, but I can't marry you," whispered Sakura as her face was revealed.

His Sharingan flickering from active to sedated, crimson to ink and back again, Itachi shook his head.

"It can't be. I saw it. It was a beautiful sakura tree," the Uchiha murmured. "It was budding. The uchiwa fan was tangled in its roots, at its base… why… why is it gone?"

"It isn't gone," said Sakura. She pulled open her robe, exposing her throat and the top of her chest. "It shifted. Now it blooms," she said, absently tracing it with her fingers. "And…"

But they could see it, Itachi and Kakashi. They could see the change in its roots. Instead of the Uchiha fan nestled among knotted tree roots, now it was a cross-hatched diamond, the clan symbol of the Hatake.

"You're carrying his son," murmured Itachi, his voice breaking.

"You knew that already," tried Sakura, but Kakashi shook his head.

"He knew it but didn't want to accept it. He would have raised him as his own but supplanted him as soon as he could," said Kakashi. "But he wouldn't have been able to. Which is why he was willing to accept my son in place of his own."

Sakura stared at Kakashi first, then spun on her heel towards Itachi in horror.

"Your clan," she breathed. "Unless Sasuke had children, your main line would die out."

"Please give me another chance, Sakura," said Itachi. "I will… permit you and Kakashi to maintain relations, discreetly. As often as possible. But please reconsider this. Us. I beg you."

And it was then that Kakashi felt pity for Uchiha Itachi, in spite of all the man had done to him. He, a clan leader, was willing to cuckold himself, subordinate himself to a clanless man in order to grasp even a sliver of artificial happiness. There was no pride left in the man before him, Kakashi realized as Itachi's shoulders slumped with defeat. Itachi had known for years that Sakura did not return his feelings and had understood his time with her was limited. It was why he had pushed Kakashi further and further away. It was only delaying the inevitable.

"Itachi, you can't…" Sakura shook her head, trying to find the words while Kakashi lowered his sword.

"I've known he was your soulmate, longer than even you did," said Itachi to Sakura. "But I can give you everything you've ever wanted. I will."

He looked at her, his emotions breaking through his stoic mask.

"Kakashi is still a boy. He isn't ready for the responsibility of a family. You saw how he reacted to the genjutsu. He was completely thrown by it. He couldn't even break out of it."

Anger picked at Kakashi's heart but he took a deep breath, willing to admit a vulnerability to the Uchiha if it would de-escalate their conflict. For Sakura's sake.

"Because I didn't want to," said Kakashi tightly. "You showed me everything I wanted and didn't know how to voice. And it's everything you want, too, isn't it? Which is why the scene was so perfect. Because it's everything you've been dreaming of for twenty years. That's exactly what you want. But you can't have it. Why would I walk away from that dream?" His voice lowered. "You won't walk away from it, either, and you have no hope of it ever happening."

Okay, perhaps Kakashi wasn't entirely willing to let it go yet.

"Kakashi," snapped Sakura, disappointment clear in her eyes. But Kakashi didn't feel even a bit sorry. Not after what Itachi had done to drive a wedge between himself and Sakura.

"Sakura wants you to be part of her life," said Kakashi as he swallowed and looked at Itachi. Kakashi let out a small sigh as Itachi looked at them. _Do it for her._

Kakashi extended his hand.

"You were the only Uchiha I ever respected, Taichou. I… I also want you to remain a close part of our life together," he added, voice gentle. "You're right that I don't know much about being a father, but I intend to do my best. I could use some advice, once in awhile."

Itachi's eyes faded from red to black and remained dark, reassuring Kakashi that he'd regained control of himself once more.

Straightening his shoulders, Itachi reached out and clasped Kakashi's bruised, scraped hand.

"If you ever fail to make her happy—" began Itachi, but Kakashi chuckled and shook his head.

"She will put me out of my misery faster than anyone else could," he said, his familiar eye crease smile hinting behind his mask.

And to Kakashi's surprise, Itachi smirked. "That she will."

They let go of their handshake when they heard Sakura yawn.

"If you're both done, get out of my room. I need to sleep," she said a few minutes later after quickly healing Kakashi's worst wounds. Her arms crossed in front of her loosely with fatigue. Her scarf was wrapped around her wrist leaving her face open and beautiful, in the men's eyes.

"The wedding's still in the morning," said Kakashi, looking between Sakura—whom he just wanted to spoon and cuddle with—and Itachi—whom he had conflicted feelings about that he'd deal with later, because Sakura needed cuddling. There was a distinct lack of cuddling going on, Kakashi thought, aggrieved. This was to be rectified. But they did have a Big Problem looming on the horizon that would need dealing with.

But… cuddles...

Itachi arched a brow watching Kakashi scootching away an inch at a time to wrap his hand around Sakura and shuffle her back towards the bed.

"I believe I have a solution," said the Uchiha.

Then he shook his head. Kakashi had already tucked Sakura into bed and was trying to sneak in beside her.

With a sigh, Itachi's shoulders shrugged. He collared Kakashi and dragged him from Sakura's room behind him.

"Shower," drawled Itachi as Kakashi scrabbled under his grip.

"I've waited months—"

"And you'll wait one more night," said Itachi, shaking his head. "There is much to do before daybreak."

Slumping and letting Itachi drag him away, Kakashi pouted, crossing his arms over his chest like a child.

_So close._

**TBC**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many thank yous to my betas sleetfallrain and aijoinu for their immeasurable help! All mistakes remain my own, of course.
> 
> Commission information is available on my tumblr, beyondthemoor.
> 
> Finally, the last chapter (epilogue) will be posted around Christmas (Dec 10-25 or so, 2016). I'm hoping to hear from EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU what you thought of it, hahahaha!


	14. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The big finale

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: HUGE kudos to all of you for sticking around to the end.
> 
> AN: Many, many thanks to aijoinu and sleetfallrain for all their help with this story, and aijoinu especially with this final chapter.
> 
> Thank you all for reading, and I hope you've enjoyed the ride.

 

 

_**The Big Day** _

In the spring-blooming gardens, beneath the rose-trellised gazebo, the mid-morning birdsong chimed sweetly with the string quartet, welcoming the guests and officiant, the Hokage herself. Light refreshments were offered to the more established attendees and sweets to the children in the bow-backed seats. The scene couldn't have been better orchestrated, even by Yamanaka Ino herself.

Which was a good thing, because the ceremony itself was now twenty minutes late in starting.

"Do I need to make an announcement about the bar opening early, Uchiha?" asked Tsunade, leaning sideways to murmur to Itachi.

Calm and serene, Itachi shook his head. "No, Hokage-sama. She is coming."

Tsunade watched him a moment longer before straightening and standing at patient attention once more. It wasn't the first time she'd had to wait for someone, after all. So she remained quiet and kept her thoughts about her delayed protégée to herself.

* * *

"You're certainly making an effort, my valued friend," said Gai as he propped his foot on the door frame.

Tuxedoed and bent over with his hands bracing himself on the same doorframe, Kakashi grunted from beneath his mask.

"But this may be a bit late for such a show of devotional grooming," huffed Gai as he yanked. "Is this your first time enjoying the benefits of hair products?"

Trying not to scuff his freshly polished borrowed shoes as he braced his footing, Kakashi gave Gai a dirty look.

"Just put more your back into it. That comb has to come loose one of these days," grunted Kakashi, the tendons in his throat standing out. "Again."

"I abhor capitulation, but I feel scissors, or even kunai, may not be out of the question at this point," said Gai. "There is only so much leave-in conditioner and detangler that one's hair can absorb before it—"

The door behind them flew open sending Gai toppling backward, while in marched an absolutely livid Yamanaka Ino in flowing purple bridesmaids dress and Hell-burning eyes.

"Did I just hear you say leave-in conditioner? Is that why we're twenty minutes late starting my _Best. Friend's. Wedding?!_ "

This was quickly followed by a wailed,

"Oh My God, what did you do to your hair? It was bad enough before~!"

There was a moment, however brief, that Kakashi wondered if he was about to be subjected to some of the Torture and Interrogation Department's choicer techniques for naughty nuke nin before he decided discretion was the better part of valour.

"Save me, Yamanaka-san, you're my only hope," he said without preamble.

"Damn straight I am," she muttered before brandishing a pair of razor-sharp garden shears.

Kakashi's eyes widened.

Where she conjured them from, he had no idea, but she was good friends with TenTen and he did not want to pursue that avenue any further.

Ino tossed her immaculately styled curls over her shoulder before giving him a Look.

"Now," she said, giving her weapons of hedge destruction a preliminary _snip-snip_ , "sit still and don't flinch."

* * *

"Thirty-five minutes, Uchiha," began Tsunade, only for the first strains of the wedding march to filter through the open air. "Ah, never mind. Here we go."

Tsunade didn't miss the subtle swallow Itachi made, however, and the tension return to his shoulders.

Not that she could blame him, she thought with a smile as she saw Sakura, the closest person to a daughter she'd ever allowed herself, appear at the end of the long navy carpet that led up to the gazebo. The veil hid her face, but not her bare shoulders and svelte silhouette which were cast in simple, graceful folds of silk and lace overlay along the hem and bust, the strategic ruching around her middle camouflaging her baby bump. To her left stood Naruto, to her right, Sasuke, standing in for her departed father. The three walked down the aisle together

For once, they did not look like a team of ninja but rather like the family they truly were.

"Breathe, Uchiha," murmured Tsunade under her breath.

To her surprise, Itachi nodded and did.

The music swelled as Sakura continued down the aisle to the altar and Sasuke passed her to Itachi, everything under control until—

" _DYNAMIC ENTRYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!"_

* * *

_I am going to pay for that once this blows over_ , thought Kakashi, poofing into existence on the dais beside Sakura while Gai kept the rest of the wedding distracted.

"Yo," he said, lifting a hand and smiling at Itachi.

The music ran off-course before going quiet, but the assembled guests more than made up for it. Yelling. Excited babbling. Loudly voiced questions.

By now Gai's posing was not helping matters. Kakashi had been noticed and the cat was out of the bag.

"A-HEM!" shouted the Hokage, slamming her hand down on the altar and losing her patience.

The wedding party fell silent, leaving Itachi and Kakashi staring each other down, Gai being shuffled off between Sasuke and Naruto, Sakura's hand still tightly clutched in Itachi's, and Tsunade glaring between Itachi and Kakashi, quite fed up with their theatrics.

"Thank you for saving my spot," said Kakashi, hair freshly cropped and tidy.

Even Itachi couldn't stop his eyes from lifting to look at Kakashi's hair before meeting Kakashi's eyes and smirking, knowing full well that was what had kept him.

Kakashi held out his right hand to Itachi.

Sakura's quick intake of breath as Itachi slowly, achingly slowly, turned Sakura around to face Kakashi, did not pass either man's notice. Kakashi also saw the subtle working of Itachi's throat as the Uchiha presented Sakura's hand to Kakashi to take.

"Thank you," he murmured, only loud enough for Itachi to hear.

Itachi nodded.

Clasping their fingers together, Kakashi's heart swelled in his chest as he looked at his bride.

"Sorry I'm late."

She shook her head, and he could hear her amused smile.

"Kakashi, you're always late."

A few of the guests near the front heard her and laughed. Itachi smiled before stepping away, facing the direction of the exit.

"Wait," called Kakashi, still holding Sakura's hand.

He reached for Itachi and grabbed his tuxedo sleeve. Lifting a brow, Itachi glared at him.

"Be my best man," said Kakashi.

Itachi froze.

"I'd feel a lot better knowing you had my back, Taichou," said Kakashi, seeing Itachi's brow furrow. "You helped make me the man I am today. You only want the best for her. It would mean everything to us."

To Kakashi's surprise, he recognized pain in Itachi's inky eyes, and the hoarse quality to his voice betrayed his agony.

"Kakashi," he began, "Think about what you're asking."

And Kakashi did. He knew what he was asking. He had been planning it since the night before, since months before when he learned about the seal.

Now that the Uchiha's seal had been supplanted by Kakashi's, Itachi's uncompromising compulsion towards Sakura would have evaporated. Any feelings Itachi held towards Sakura would be his own genuine ones. And Kakashi saw Itachi's eyes, when he watched Sakura walk down the aisle towards him. He'd even held Gai back a moment because he'd been so struck by the open love in the Uchiha's body language. There was nothing Itachi wouldn't have done for Sakura, in that moment.

Seal or no seal, Uchiha Itachi was heart-stoppingly in love with Haruno Sakura.

And he was handing her over to another man.

Kakashi could see the emotions warring within Itachi. The way Itachi's fingers twitched at his sides, the way his feet still pointed towards the exit showed Kakashi that Itachi wanted nothing more than to run and take Sakura away with him. But he didn't. Because that wasn't what she wanted.

She wanted Kakashi.

And Itachi was trying to walk away to save himself the heartbreak of actually seeing the ceremony that would make her Kakashi's wife.

Kakashi was not being deliberately cruel, however. He respected Itachi and understood why the man had tried to push him away for so long. He knew Itachi had only wanted the best for Sakura, and hadn't felt Kakashi was up to the job. And then, when Kakashi was, Itachi had panicked and tried to shove Kakashi away because he knew Sakura had feelings for him and his position as her best opportunity was slipping. Everything Itachi had worked for within the clan, from getting Sakura accepted as a potential matriarch to praising her abilities and raising her standing as a kunoichi, was about to be stolen out from under him because she was falling in love with another man. Kakashi had threatened everything Itachi had worked for, just by being the shinobi and person he was.

"Stay and be part of the happiest day of our life together, Itachi," said Sakura quietly.

Itachi's brows dipped as he looked longingly at Sakura.

"Please," she added.

Itachi's shoulders slumped—for him; for anyone else, it would have been negligible—and he gave a subtle nod, taking his place as best man.

"Gai, you can knock it off," called Kakashi. He nodded to Tsunade. "Ready," he said with an eye-crease smile.

Tsunade looked at him, brow raised.

"Are we still holding a wedding today, or can I go straight to the bar?"

Beneath the veil, Sakura blushed and nodded.

"Yes, Tsunade-Shishou," she said, voice happy and light.

Tsunade nodded, her internal thoughts carefully masked as she watched Kakashi smile at Sakura.

This kid had somehow arranged to have an entire wedding party organized and catered… on his love-rival's dime.

_Definitely Hokage material_ , she thought to herself, mentally bookmarking him for future promotion.

* * *

Tsunade lifted her hands and indicated the couple before her.

"And now, ladies and gentlemen, what you've all been waiting for!" She called. "Kakashi, you may kiss the bride."

The hooting and hollering of the crowd drowned out anything further the Hokage may have added as Kakashi and Sakura looked at each other.

A bit embarrassed, Kakashi realised he hadn't planned quite this far ahead.

"With or without?" whispered Sakura, giggling nervously.

"Lady's choice," he said smoothly, avoiding the decision.

"... without," she breathed, and he could tell by how her words were clipped that she was biting her lip.

More gently than he'd known he could be, he reached up to cradle her jaw beneath the veil.

Then, to the crowd's excitement, he angled his head, and dipped Sakura, her veil buffeted by the movement as he kissed her to raucous applause—

—applause which crescendoed as Sakura's seal was revealed, turning into gasps of awe as the cherry blossom tree was revealed, traveling from her cheek down her throat to nestle at her collarbone… its roots shaped in the cross-hatched Hatake-clan symbol.

They disappeared in a poof of cherry blossoms and smoke, thunderous applause, and Sasuke witnessing the heartbreaking loss in his brother's spinning Sharingan eyes.

* * *

"Smooth move, Kakashi, smooth move," Genma congratulated Kakashi that night at the reception.

Genma lifted his beer and nodded at Kakashi, who lifted his glass of champagne in return.

Completely unwilling to be separated from Sakura for even a moment after so many months apart, Kakashi refused to remove his warm, possessive arm from around her waist until she laughed, kissed his cheek, and reminded him she needed to pee (again).

With a mournful sigh, he relented. Which was how he ended up with his friends Iruka and Genma, Sakura's friends and teammates nearby.

"So, where are you two headed after this?" asked Iruka.

Kakashi shrugged, not paying much attention. His visible eye was glued to the ladies' room door.

Genma guffawed, nudging Kakashi.

"Your place or hers… wait, do you still have a place? I thought you put all your stuff in storage?"

"Yeah, and wasn't Sakura's place damaged in that freak accident last night?" asked Iruka.

Their words finally registered with Kakashi.

… oh. They had a point.

From several meters away, Sasuke glanced at his miserable-but-trying-to-hide-it brother and found him mid-eye-conversation with the Hokage. She gave him a Look and they made their way to a quieter section of the room, casting a privacy jutsu. Sasuke's brow furrowed.

Sakura reappeared and Kakashi made a beeline to her, in spite of his friend's deliberate attempts to get in his way and delay him.

Then, when they finally joined each other's side, everyone was chiming their spoons against their glasses, or stomping on the floor, or clapping and chanting, "Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!" again, and, well, as newlyweds it was their job to oblige…

(This time, Sakura dipped him to hide his face.)

* * *

The night wore on and as the newlyweds hadn't had much sleep the night before—or for days prior to, in Kakashi's case—they were getting punch-drunk from fatigue.

Taking pity on them, and on Kakashi's growing anxiety—she'd heard him speaking to Sasuke and Naruto asking if there had been prior honeymoon plans he was supposed to have been advised about—Tsunade drew Sakura and Kakashi away to the gardens outside.

"Say your goodbyes," she advised, and they did. "Follow me."

With that they entered a carriage, obviously the Hokage's personal one for official functions, and rode through the Village to the outskirts before debarking.

"This way," she said and led them through the woods along a freshly cleared path.

The torchlight through the forest was their first indication that they were approaching a large, very well maintained, traditional estate. The training grounds to the left stretched for acres, and to the right, the gardens glowed softly with dragonflies reflecting in pools and short, craggy waterfalls.

Sakura gasped as the main structure of the house itself came into view, and even Kakashi found himself swallowing a breath.

"Congratulations, Sakura and Kakashi," said Tsunade, her tone softer than usual at the awe in their faces.

"Shishou," breathed Sakura. "Is this for our honeymoon stay?"

Tsunade laughed.

"It's your wedding present. Lots of room for the ninken to run around, lots of training space for your earth-shattering strength and to teach your little ones, as they come," she said, smiling.

"It's too much," insisted Sakura, and Kakashi was inclined to agree. This… this was an estate fit for a…

A clan head.

He was a clan head.

"Meh, it was land outsourced to the Village years ago but we forgot to actually map it, yada yada yada, it's yours and you have to take it so stop argui—ooph!"

Sakura cut off Tsunade's words when she grabbed her Shishou around the middle in a crushing embrace.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you so much!" squealed Sakura.

Kakashi watched as Tsunade's entire countenance relaxed and she wrapped her hands around Sakura and returned the hug, stroking her hair.

"It's given with love," said Tsunade, smiling fondly down at Sakura.

Swallowing and feeling out of his depth, Kakashi stepped forward and reached out to shake Tsunade's hand.

With an exasperated sigh, the Hokage rolled her eyes and drew Kakashi into the group hug.

She shook her head and sighed.

"I'd say go and enjoy your honeymoon, but it looks like you already did," she teased, gesturing to Sakura's baby bump. "Go, have a nice bath, relax, and sleep as long as you need. Breakfast will be delivered whenever you ring the bell. You'll know it when you see it," Tsunade said with a wink.

"Servants?" asked Kakashi.

Tsunade winked. "Better. Ninken. Pakkun took charge of things."

Kakashi grinned. "They'll be thrilled at the new grounds," he admitted.

With a nod, Tsunade released them and handed them the key to Sakura.

"Now, young man, it is time to sweep your wife off her feet and carry her across the threshold."

And so he did.

("Don't you dare drop me," threatened Sakura. "That would involve letting you go, and so no," replied Kakashi.)

* * *

_**A few months later** _

The baby shower was held in Sakura and Kakashi's new home.

Ino organized it, though Naruto insisted on being heavily involved, which meant Sasuke became involved by proxy to assist and also firefight any fires inadvertently ignited. Both figuratively and literally.

Even Kakashi got into the swing of things when his pups insisted on being part of things.

"Thank you, Bull," said Sakura as the gentle giant brought her a blanket to put across her middle when she felt a little chilled.

The dog gave her a sloppy kiss and a happy woof when she scratched him behind the ears, and she laughed. The ninken had become part of their family.

The party wound down and Kakashi was settling some of the diapers out on the changing table—Sasuke, of all people, had explained to him what it was and what it was for—when the diapers slid to the side and off, falling to the floor.

Exhausted but not wanting to leave a mess—he'd dutifully re-arranged the furniture four times during Sakura's 'nesting' phase—he pulled the changing table away from where Sasuke had set it up against the wall, reached down… and felt something brush against the back of his hand when he pulled the spilled diaper out of the way.

The baseboard along the wall was uneven, Kakashi realised, pulling the changing table out of the way.

A tactile memory nearly a year old surfaced, and Kakashi was casting hand signs before he thought further.

The panel in the wall opened, revealing a secret panel, which, when Kakashi pressed further in, lead to a secret room. A room decorated in uchiwa fans along the baseboard, with an exit further along…

And then Kakashi remembered where, when, and why he'd learned the jutsu to reveal the secret panel.

Sasuke had taught him the release so he could infiltrate the Uchiha shrine and break into their hidden rooms to discover the secrets behind the seal.

Sasuke had set up the change table in this spot to conceal the secret panel.

Sasuke helped build this house, Kakashi realized.

But how?...

And then it hit Kakashi.

This was the house Itachi built for Sakura.

This house was Itachi's wedding gift to Sakura.

A house away from the Uchiha clan.

Tsunade wasn't the one who gave them this house. Itachi was.

… Itachi had been preparing to leave the clan to be with Sakura.

Kakashi felt like he'd been punched.

Once more Kakashi realized just how selfless Itachi had been.

Being his best man at the wedding had been Itachi conceding defeat like a gentleman; his gifting of his physical labour, his own house, to them conveyed to Kakashi his acceptance. His acceptance of not only Kakashi and Sakura's relationship, but his acceptance of his role as clan head.

Itachi blessed their union.

Profoundly grateful, Kakashi knew what he had to do.

* * *

_**The following day** _

Jiraiya answered the knock at his apartment door, his wide lips breaking into a smile as he recognized his visitor.

"Kakashi! Come on in!"

Settled in on Jiraiya's couch with fresh tea, Kakashi set out his terms.

"You want the photos back?" asked Jiraiya, scratching his jaw.

Kakashi nodded.

"And I'd prefer if you not publish any stories about Uchiha Itachi, even ones where he is mentioned in passing," added Kakashi.

Jiraiya's brow arched.

"Anything you'd care to elaborate on?"

"No," grinned Kakashi. "Only that Sakura won't be around the hospital for a year or so to help patch up anyone who tries to replicate anything, which will leave your publisher on the line for any attempted scenic recreations that end badly…"

Kakashi shook his head, tutting under his breath.

"Imagine the overabundance of hospital admissions and the wrath of the other medics…"

Jiraiya blinked.

"... that's a very good point," grumbled Jiraiya before he stood and went to get the folder Kakashi requested. "How's Sakura doing these days?" he asked, flipping through his files.

Kakashi's resulting grin—hidden as it was behind his mask—was stupidly happy, which was all the answer Jiraiya needed.

The older man chuckled under his breath.

* * *

_**At the Academy, several weeks later** _

"Like this, Hatake-sensei?" asked a young voice.

"If you want," said Kakashi, not looking up from his yellow-jacketed Icha Icha.

Out on the training grounds, high up in the branches of a deciduous tree, Kakashi was supposed to be supervising the younger students and helping them refine their kunai-throwing technique.

Unfortunately, he'd lost interest quickly.

Any day now, Sakura would have their son. It was past their due date. The Hokage had said all was well, and first babies were often late, and everything was healthy and fine and would he stop interrupting her sleep every time Sakura asked him for ice cream because he was her husband, not her, and no she wasn't coming by to check up on things they were fine and getthehelloutbeforesheremindshimwhyshewasHokage.

Hmph.

"Boss, Sakura's water just broke," announced Pakkun from beside Kakashi. Several ninken stayed with Sakura throughout the day to assist her, and they reported back to him periodically.

This update was a little more exciting than he'd been ready for, though.

Dropping out of his tree—completely controlled, he hadn't fallen, really, it was planned—Kakashi took off at lightning speed to the hospital.

"She's still at home. She says it'll still be a while," said Pakkun, trying to catch up to Kakashi.

Kakashi changed direction mid-leap.

* * *

Somehow they managed to get Sakura to the hospital, and Kakashi thought he was showing immense restraint when he sent only seven bunshin to collect the Hokage to deliver his precious son.

(The Hokage thought otherwise, but Kakashi was too panicked to really take direction at that point.)

The aforementioned precious son was now being cuddled by his proud papa and shown off to his friends.

"Say anything negative and I will castrate you," said Kakashi, unable to stop smiling from behind his mask as he introduced Genma and Iruka to his bundle of joy.

"He's very handsome and strong," said Iruka dutifully. "However, we will be having a chat later about you abandoning an entire class of seven-year-olds during weapons training. Leaving Pakkun in charge does not count as adequate supervision."

"Pakkun is a responsible, mature ninken," argued Kakashi, rocking on his feet to calm his son, who happened to be rooting around Kakashi's chest looking for something to eat. "And the lesson in tracking will no doubt be useful in the future. If you'll excuse me, it's time for lunch for the best little shinobi who ever lived. Yes, he is. Yes, he is..."

Genma chuckled while Iruka sighed.

* * *

_**A few years later…** _

"Hi Mama!" called Souma, waving from atop Bull's back a sunny afternoon as they passed the training grounds on their way home from the market. Steady as always, Bull paced himself to ensure the active three-year-old did not risk falling from his broad back.

With her new genin team sweating and laid out on the ground around her, Sakura laughed and approached Souma, Bull, Pakkun, Kakashi and their daughter, Suzumu.

With her tiny fist waving, Suzumu grabbed Sakura's finger when Sakura reached for her daughter to sweep her messy bangs out of her infant daughter's sweet face.

"Someone's being a good girl and keeping her hat on today," grinned Sakura, kissing Suzumu on the nose before giving Kakashi a peck on the cheek. He carried their fourteen-month-old on his front in the baby carrier while his hands were full of grocery bags.

"New jutsu!" called Souma, bouncing on Bull's back.

Sakura looked at Kakashi, who shrugged.

"It won't come off until I release it," he said, grinning beneath his mask.

Only wearing her own mask while on missions now, Sakura's open face revealed her amusement clearly. Kakashi never tired of drinking in her daily expressions. Every time he saw her emotions he fell more and more in love with her and the trust she'd placed in him.

"How're they doing?" he asked, gesturing his chin towards her 'team'. They were a mishmash of the Academy's most troubled and troublesome students, neatly packaged into Sakura's Responsibility because they scared Iruka too much. Apparently, she was designated the 'Fixer' after working her magic on some other hopeless waste case…

What few knew was that once Sakura got through to her students, they'd turned into model shinobi and kunoichi.

And they would lay down their lives to protect Souma and Suzumu, treating them like their own little siblings.

"We're working on chakra control today. A bit of a struggle, but they'll get there," said Sakura confidently.

Kakashi chuckled and nodded.

"Well, I don't know what to do with all the extra food I'm making for supper. We're having stir fry, roast pork and plenty of sides tonight," he said loudly enough to carry before winking at Sakura, who grinned at him. Her back was to her students, but they both knew they'd heard.

"Sakura-sensei…" began one student, her kunoichi, making both Kakashi and Sakura grin.

Her students were always welcome at their home. At least one of them would be joining them that night, if not all.

… the free babysitting was also a nice perk.

* * *

That night, after they'd put their children to bed, Kakashi lay on the couch with his head in Sakura's lap as she finger-combed his hair.

His eyes closed, he hummed peacefully in the back of his throat, content with everything in his lot in life.

"Time for another trim?" asked Sakura, tugging gently as she massaged his scalp.

He rolled onto his side, wrapping his arms around her and burying his face in her stomach.

"Ngh," he mumbled, rubbing his face in her shirt and nudging it upwards.

She chuckled.

"I really liked it short at our wedding reception," she needled him.

"Would you believe it was accidental?" he said, laying a trail of kisses across the soft skin of her belly.

"What happened? I never did get the full story…"

"I fought valiantly against a comb," he began solemnly.

There was a pause.

"... the comb won," he admitted, smiling as he felt Sakura laughing.

He kissed her belly again and tickled her sides, sighing happily as she giggled and gasped for air.

She stroked his hair, scratching her nails lightly across his scalp and he moaned in pleasure, closing his eyes.

"Hmmmm," he sighed.

Some time later, when their clothes lay discarded around the room and Kakashi panted, shuddering from his release beneath Sakura as she finished riding out her third orgasm, he wrapped his arms around her still-trembling shoulders and held her against his naked chest, heart to heart.

"So, how do you feel about three?" she asked him with a satisfied sigh.

She traced the outline of his sculpted pectoral muscles, occasionally causing them to jump beneath her fingers.

"Three?" he murmured, half-asleep.

"Well, three and four, actually," she admitted.

And Kakashi recognized her lip-biting voice and cracked his charcoal eye open, lifting his head to look at her.

It took a moment for her words to sink in but when they did, both his eyes were wide.

He blinked.

"Three… and four…?"

She nodded.

Kakashi's head dropped down to the couch again.

"Damn, I'm potent," he joked, laughing when Sakura lightly smacked him in the chest.

"Pervert," she muttered, though she was laughing, too.

"How far?" he asked, cuddling her closer.

"Three months, give or take a week," she said, curling her body around his.

He nodded.

"Also, Tsunade says that if you send one more bunshin team to get her for the birth, she's going to snip you," said Sakura.

Kakashi chuckled before clearing his throat.

"She wouldn't. She loves her grandbabies."

"Snip snip."

"Don't say things like that," said Kakashi.

"Snip."

"Oy."

"Sn—"

"I'm a young man in my prime, I'll have you know."

"Sn—hahahahah!"

With a quick shift, Kakashi had flipped them over and buried his face in Sakura's throat, kissing her while tickling her sides with his long, nimble fingers.

"Stop it, you'll wake the kids!"

"Good, they should know how lucky they are to have such loving parents."

Still laughing, Sakura wrapped her arms around Kakashi again and wrapped her leg around his hip before kissing him, long and slow, and immediately getting his attention.

"I love you, Hatake Kakashi," she said when she eventually pulled away. "You make me feel like a very lucky woman."

His heart pounding in his chest, Kakashi knew he was the lucky one.

"I love you, too, Hatake Sakura."

They moved against each other, soon falling into a familiar, heady, sensual routine.

* * *

_**A year later** _

Kakashi regarded his genin team. It was his turn since Sakura was still on maternity leave, and he needed more babysitters now that Sakura's old team had graduated to chunin and were on more away missions.

With one of the twins in a baby sling on his chest, he wondered how Sakura had made it seem so easy. She'd had her team eating out of the palm of her hand.

His own team regarded him as an enemy.

Well, he'd teach them teamwork. Whether they liked it or not.

"Your first test of the day is this: you must take the candy from the baby."

The genin stared at him, unimpressed.

"That's easy," snorted one particularly entitled shithead. Student. Oops.

Behind his mask, Kakashi grinned. It didn't reach his eyes.

"Ah, you see, the baby's pacifier is her 'candy'. And you must take it from her without waking her," he explained. "You have until she gets hungry."

"When's that?"

Kakashi shrugged.

"You'll figure it out."

Yep. He was nailing this teaching thing.

He'd be the best genin teacher ever, he decided, pulling out his favourite edition of _Icha Icha Tactics_...

… and promptly forgot about his students.

(Some things never change.)

* * *

**THE END**

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many thanks to everyone who joined us on the KakaSaku ride, and especially those reviewers who took a moment to let me know what they thought of this story. ^_^Y
> 
>  
> 
> Once again, I want to express my heartfelt gratitude to my amazing betas, sleetfallrain and AijoInu, for all their constructive criticism through this story. You two made this story so much stronger and better; I couldn't have done it without you!
> 
> # # # # #
> 
> I'll take a moment here to explain (?) perhaps a few questions / criticisms I received:
> 
> Q: Why did Kakashi leave after his night with Sakura?
> 
> A: Because there was no way for him to know if what he did was enough to sever her bond with Itachi. If it didn't, he couldn't stand to live in the Village anymore, seeing them together. He also didn't have the confidence or determination, yet, to challenge the Uchiha as a clan.
> 
> Q: Why did Sakura stay with Itachi after that? When she sort of knew?
> 
> A: Because she was between a rock and a hard place. She knew Itachi / The Uchiha had the Village in their pocket, and what they said goes as gospel. There was no way out of the situation without her losing face, without cuckolding Itachi and making him lose face, without the Uchiha losing face.
> 
> Q: What did Ino send Kakashi that made him change his mind?
> 
> A: Two things: the invitation to the wedding and a drawing of Sakura's seal (changed, showing the Hatake cross-hatch clan symbol at its root instead of the Uchiha fan clan symbol). This showed Kakashi that he broke Itachi's seal and supplanted it with his own.
> 
> Q: You didn't show the big-ass fight between Kakashi and the Uchiha, or between Kakashi and Itachi! You had Itachi back down way too easily!
> 
> A: The conflict between Itachi and Kakashi would never have been solved with a physical fight, and I wasn't going to waste words on one.
> 
> There's more to all of this, of course, but... You're a smart bunch so I have no doubt you'll figure things out.
> 
> Cheers, and happy holidays!

**Author's Note:**

> AN: No update schedule set for this one yet; I'm writing the last chapter and finishing up the edits, though. Please let me know what you think!


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